How can you not be romantic about baseball?

Everybody thinks 'https://' stands for 'hypertext transfer protocol secure' but it actually stands for 'head to this place, sucka' followed by a colon and two laser sounds

World getting you down? Can’t blame you. So why not take a few seconds to watch Vladdy massacre a baseball into the second deck. It’s good for the soul.

Someone explain this to me like I’m really really dumb: if I’m Kyle Tucker, why would I want to reenter free agency when I’m 32 or 33? How much short-term money would I need to take on the risk of injury/aging/CBA changes depressing the value of my next (and possibly final) contract?

On any other continent this would be called ethnic cleansing

One of the worst things on the internet is when someone does something weird and interesting seemingly out of a sense of whimsy/love/mild obsessiveness but a few months in it turns out there had always been a monetization strategy and it was all in the hopes of going viral and hitting the jackpot.

1. That Ford worker is a goddamn hero 2. Hit dogs holler

Can’t believe he said this, seems somewhat disrespectful

eyes emoji

Okay I solved the mystery it’s that not a single character they introduced since Endgame has landed, so they’re having to reach back as far as a quarter century to give audiences a reason to give a shit

lol owned

Dogbert Will Return In Avengers: Doomsday

When music streaming services started doing year-end reviews it was kinda fun and interesting, but this is taking it way way way too far

lol it's up to six now

anyway if you work at the syndicate get in touch

Well!

Dilberitos (1999-2003): A line of licensed vegan microwave burritos tied-in with the comic strip "Dilbert". Available in Mexican, Indian, Barbecue, and Garlic & Herb. Noted for it's poor taste and food engineering that packed all 23 essential vitamins and minerals into each one

He is survived by his husband and cousin, Eric Adams.

Hahaha People Mag comes out blasting

Really can’t get over this video of more than a half dozen ICE agents forming a tactical perimeter at a suburban Minnesota Target so their commander can use the bathroom, cosplaying like they’re in Fallujah. What an absurd waste of taxpayer dollars.

She strikes me as the kind of functionary who is a little too far down the org chart to get a prophylactic pardon on the way out, but high enough up to be held accountable for all manner of malfeasance in the aftermath.

I’m not sure if these are photos of something or nothing but I really like them

This is a very good analysis but it completely misses the underlying reason the Celtics lost: the Basketball Gods punishing Boston for those heinous white and gold uniforms

babybel implies the existence of scarybel, sportybel, gingerbel and poshbel

the replay really makes this one

It’s kinda amazing how the Packers have had two consecutive generational god-tier quarterbacks, both of whom have managed to alienate literally every single person even remotely aware of them in the back end of their career/retirement

OVER EVERYTHING

this scam is funny enough I think he should get to keep the money

The really scary thing is that making your bomber look like a Cessna or shooting at shipwrecked survivors aren’t hard cases: they’re the first entries in a textbook on war crimes, as well as patently dishonourable. So you have to wonder: what other obviously illegal orders will US troops obey?

Damn right he is

Who decided to call them radicalized wine moms and not Chiantifa?

These are great. In particular, there are a few songs that might not have been the most obvious choice from a band, but they’re still bangers. And, no two people will agree about each and every one of over 100 songs, but even the choices I don’t love capture the feeling of the moment circa then.

Ben Shapiro said the Christmas Adventurer plot line in One Battle After Another was ridiculous

Found some ice they shouldn’t abolish

Sean Penn at the Golden Globes reminding me that he looks like Wile E. Coyote after a TNT mishap

Maybe the most fascinating belief among the billionaire class, especially the Silicon Valley set, has been their confidence that if they blow up the specific conditions and institutions that put them on top, they will certainly come out even higher on top

Here is a funny video of Sir Alec Guinness in a frankly unconvincing wig. Quoted post unrelated. www.youtube.com/watch?v=RzDA...

ICQ was way ahead of its time, at least in the sense that it predicted an era in which every new development warrants an “Uh-Oh!”

Really easy to convince yourself you're wisely communicating where people are when you're really just indulging the vanity of holding onto a six- or seven-digit follower count

"Powell should protect the Fed's independence by bending to Trump's pressure, stepping down and letting him appoint a fourth vote who will definitely scrupulously observe the norms of independence and ethics that have characterized this administration's relations with notionally arms-length bodies."

How do you not give continuation on that?

Gotta say I like the cut of that Murray-Boyles lad's jib

When I get an urgent file dumped on me two days before I’m scheduled to go on leave

I have so many things I could say about Canada’ Government, its Minister of AI, and Elon’s Nazi BBS and CSAM machine but

Imagine being so hated that even Minnesotans wouldn’t give your stuck vehicle a push.

I'm not sure who first called TCW "Waluigi Coates" but I think of it whenever I see his name and it never fails to make me chuckle a bit.

The Virgin Democratic Party Establishment Candidate: "ICE isn't coordinating with local police. This is no way to bring down prices!" The Chad Episcopalian Bishop: "I have instructed my priests to prepare for martyrdom."

Marx remarked "Hegel remarks somewhere that all great world-historic facts and personages appear, so to speak, twice. He forgot to add: the first time as tragedy, the second time as farce." What they didn't know, but the 21st Century teaches, is things appear a 3rd time, just really fucking stupid.