Finally watching Pillion, a movie made instantly relatable by the fact that I do not believe a human being alive says no when Alexander Skarskard is staring directly at them.

I think it should be illegal to dump musicians while they’re in the middle of recording an album. You can dump them before, you can dump them after, dumping them while they’re still writing just makes it confusing for all of us.

Here’s how I realized I had long covid. I got sick but improved. A month later was Christmas. I did all my usual activities - baking, hosting, good solid walks. On New Year’s Day I collapsed getting out of bed, couldn’t get up for a week, and never, ever got that level of energy back.

Has he been ousted or did he just teleport away

You think we’ve done nothing?? Buddy, you won’t even BELIEVE how little we’re about to do!

Do you ever try to look for a specific item of clothing online - in this case a mustard sleeveless cotton gauze dress that I keep seeing in an ad - and end up feeling that maybe mustard doesn’t exist and maybe dresses don’t exist and maybe you should just run naked into the woods screaming

This is like if you lost a fight to every domestic cat in America and decided the next logical step was to attack a pack of lionesses.

I really, really hate this take. First of all, it’s set in 14th century Italy, when marriages at those ages were common, in fact if you did *actually read it*, you’d know a subplot is Juliet’s parents marrying her off to Paris. Secondly, if you don’t buy the romance, the tragedy doesn’t work.

James Carville got so confused by democrats winning that he quit.

imagining a grizzled hardboiled detective saying this while gripping some guy's lapels at a shady bar

Wil E Coyote demands Road Runner apologizes for not being eaten AND for not warning him Acme’s rockets are unreliable

If I catch you being like “but who will use this? No one cares about Covid” I will hurl my shoe through the Internet. This is not a perfect drug but can be hugely helpful to high risk people (who have to still care about Covid) when we get those “oops, remember I told you I had allergies?” Calls.

Whew the centrists are being *embarrassing.*

Do these people ever look in a mirror and try saying aloud “WANTING A CITY RUN GROCERY STORE IS THE SAME AS WHITE NATIONALISM” because I think they should try it, as a wee exercise to see if mirrors can laugh.

A tent big enough for everyone but the left, eh.

Sexual harassers, things of that nature

Honest to god, from a screenwriter, it’s because there’s one single unmistakable visual element that goes with it.

Look from my experience with nature as an entity it’s entirely possible it was actually trying to give trees camouflage to look like owls. Why? Who knows, have you seen a blobfish? Why anything.

This is true In principle, but unfortunately basic science class as I remember it was less an education on critical thinking and the scientific method and more “oh god oh god you all have to pass standardized testing so we get money from the state so please memorize these 300 things.”

Isaac Chotiner: can you list some examples of systemic oppression green creatures face? Kermit the Frog: I’m sorry? Isaac Chotiner: well you do mention the difficulty quite a lot

FUCCCCCKKK THIS.

Why is it always the fault of feminism and never men being live-action trash can fires?

John Oliver is talking about the feral hog problem, and there is an article about wolves spreading out of control in Florida after being brought in to get rid of pythons, the obvious answer is to drive the hogs and wolves into the same area and see who wins.

The millennial urge to get a daschund and name it Mom.

The president of the United States is having bystanders arrested by outside state police because he cannot admit he doesn’t know how to fill a pool, it is absolutely not minor.

Do you ever see a movie and think “I’m so glad this came out while Ebert was alive?” Well that was THE FALL for me.

I’m going absolutely insane trying to remember a Sesame Street sketch or something I’m pretty sure is animated where a clam says “claaaaaaam!” In an excited voice. Help me.

This is the most beautifully petty thing I’ve ever seen

There’s something truly amazing to me that there’s still a country where people can say “no you’re doing a very bad job, you’re a bad boy” and the PRIME MINISTER will go “my gosh! So sorry! I’ll leave at once!”

I’m watching FOOTLOOSE for the first time, which appears to be about a Chicago teen who moves to a rural Utah town where there’s a law that plots only happen offscreen

Oh no, no no no. Bush and Cheney used 9/11 to spearhead making Islamophobia the centerpiece of the Republican Party and tested the waters on authoritarianism. There is no MAGA power surge without “if you’re not with us you’re against us” and the Iraq war.

I found out about an egret rookery today and if you know me, you know I’m going to see an egret rookery, and it was not disappointing!

Sometimes I wish the democrats were as smart as trump thinks

There's a case to be made that nobody has had more influence on the modern era of the television medium than James Burrows. His mastery of the half-hour comedy especially is unmatched & always will be. A master of what he did and incredibly beloved. RIP to a great 💚 people.com/james-burrow...

Look misogyny aside we really gotta ask why this guy thinks infants eat frozen yogurt.

Somehow i had no idea there were enslaved people in New Jersey

Watching EXPLORERS, a movie about young Ethan Hawke, young River Phoenix, and a third boy whose every line is the saddest thing you’ve ever heard in your life.

This man has not existed since 1983

There are solutions to a lot of our problems but the one I cannot even begin to figure out is what we do about the fact that we randomly decided a guy - one of our worst guys - couldn’t be held to a single legal standard and could do anything he wanted and take all our money.

The thing about Hilary Clinton is she DID face misogyny and unfair characterization because of her husband and she is very smart - AND ALSO, she is a big piece of shit.

I can only echo fucking what?? By who????

Great by someone with a PhD in knowing water stuff, and the tldr is there is a way to fix the reflecting pool and if they don’t there’s a risk of toxic growths that could kill pets and wildlife and hurt people. Although “kill pets and wildlife and hurt people” is basically the trump motto.

I saw an article that says “Fans Turn On Nate Bargatze After White House UFC Fight Attendance” and going by the box office for The Breadwinner, I assumed they already had

Ok I normally don’t believe in gender essentialism but I just saw an ad where a WOMAN ate a CLIF BAR and I’M SORRY, we were expressly told those were not for us!! WE WERE GIVEN LUNA BARS, DID THE GRANOLA INDUSTRY NOT DO ENOUGH??

Isaac Chotiner interviews are the closest thing we have to Monty Python in the 21st century

This is such a weirdly meanspirited article that gets one of the details of the finale wrong (it was a koala-tee, not a “cool tea”) and another contestant had “claimed” fun wordplay for the series and was annoyed when Kumail did it, which is absolute projection. Taskmaster doesn’t need this.

Also: letting them go to those places with their friends and not you, their parents.

Why are we trying to, um, “nuke” one of the most accessible forms of creative expression and gateway to artistic careers that’s ever been invented? Seems like banning Nazis would be a bit simpler!

Honestly pretty incredible to watch the women on The View call out JD Vance’s lies more times in two minutes than I’ve seen White House press do in several years

And as we all know this is an administration that regards poem writing with the highest respect.