me (bursting open my apartment window like ebenezer scrooge): you there, boy! did it happen? boy (gloomily): no sir

Even if It doesn't happen tonight this is good practice. Gotta be ready any time

You used to be able to "inspect element" in this country. You used to be able to download video

Getting reports that JD vances forces have squadwiped Miller's troops on the steps of the capitol. But what's this? Nancy Pelosi is in a mech suit?

donald trump has died

I just woke up from a nap and somehow while I was asleep, everyone on the bus has figured out we are not going to the right place

“Since you didn’t give me a peace prize I declare war on you” is the ultimate “you called me racist too many times, now I am racist”

Holy shit. Simon Rosenberg, the longtime Dem lobbyist for Silicon Valley, has been trying to edit his own Wikipedia page under the user handle SimonWDC. Specifically, on March 13, 2025, he tried to delete this politically damaging paragraph from his biography:

I went on Substack to suggest to Simon Rosenberg that there might be some valid reasons for Minneapolis activists to be suspicious of Dem party fundraising. Ooof.

Oh yeah. You should check out his other movie, Synechdoche New York .... oh seriously? That's not how you pronounce it? I guess I've only read it. So it's like... Yerk? Yawrk? Oh thanks

If a Minnesotan says to you, "I don't plan to let you do that," run.

Evil

alright look I’ve added Garfield

haha

me (recording front facing video on my phone): the internet asked and we delivered! welcome to whiskey fridays with tony dookie pill tony dokoupil (gagged and tied up in my basement dressed as a yellow pikmin): nrt hrw ifs prnounced me: no talking tony. pick up that soda can

This is quite a post www.planetearthandbeyond.co/p/reality-is...

I was trying to buy happiness with the power of cold hard cash and just really getting my ass handed to me. A total bloodbath.

Castle doctrine applies to Raised up pickups with superbright LEDs

Does anyone feel like ishowspeed has one Final Mission to complete? And that he would have a clear line of sight from the DC Rockefeller Hotel roof?

X has stopped working

We made it

Sorry I had some good weed

I did not know these guys were smart

been staring at this image on and off all day

That's just clothmotherslop. You just chose her because you crave warmth and connection

They’re calling it the most divorced anyone has ever been

Political Profile: Gregory Bovino https://theonion.com/political-profile-gregory-bovino/

keep fighting

r/AITA Hey reddit. I got the ick when I found out my husband's undercover ICE vehicle was seized by protesters and they got his phone number and keep calling him and posted videos of him running away tagged "little bitch boy" and "whiny scaredy pig." AITA?

That's just enrichmentslop bro. You only enjoy your enclosure because it's been made engaging

These neighborhood signal chats are absolutely crazy right now. You’ve got young activists in there with the most normie folks alive who all just absolutely fucking hate ICE so much. And they are all willing to put their bodies on the line for their communities.

Not right now kitten. They've seized daddy's squad car and figured out where daddy lives. Daddy can hear them surrounding daddy's home

We are at the “Minnesotans are spray painting their broiler pans for body armor” stage of the fight

They're literally taking hostages

Wow. Scott Adams just got to 24 hours without AI-hypnogooning. A new record

my friend was maced by ICE agents outside of the coffee shop where I do my homework. she was just standing there filming them and they maced her directly in the eyes and fled the scene. our communities are being terrorized.

the problem with an untrained secret police squad that shoots people in their cars isn’t that they’re untrained

Non-protesting dad just trying to hustle his kids, as young as 6mo, out of the neighborhood. ICE threw a flash-bang INTO HIS car, all 6 kids in the hospital now. If anyone wondered how things turn against occupying armies there's a case study playing out in front of you.

Between B*rnie, my ex-wife, the tenant from hell, and general chumpfuckery, this has been a cromulent fuckcrustable of a day. Tony Dokoupil needy Whiskey Friday

After ICE agents shot people in Minneapolis tonight, a crowd faced them down and eventually chased them away, despite federal mercenaries and police shooting a tremendous amount of tear gas. ICE agents abandoned vehicles in the area, containing IDs, paperwork, license plates, and operational plans.

lootboxed them lmao