Yeah, yeah. OK.

Today I heard a Geordie saying “FYI”. That has been the highlight of my day.

Engraving two bullets with "this bullet only lies" and "this bullet only tells the truth" to really stump the FBI

I never knew that the light of ages Breaks the way before us Sail away. sail away

In the UK, we are guaranteed the world's most indoor gym. But in a separate Scotland, we would potentially lose access to chocolate. The pointlessness of nationalism is plain for all to see. We simply can't risk this.

Cuma nach ghabh thu am bristeadh Latha ligheadh na fala A hi eile fe o hiri si bho horo hu Fal eile bho hiri si bho ho fal eile bho How were you not broken On the day of the blood-letting?

Across the waves From Sellafield you came in unseen wonder A life begun, a chain undone

Have been wondering for a while what the best feeling in life is, and happy to finally confirm that it’s the feeling of going to bed after a huge hillwalk.

Holy mother of god, I needed a hillwalk this week more than I’ve ever needed a hillwalk in the history of the world.

Maria Steen not getting enough nominations to be in the Irish presidential election, and Robyn having a new album announced on the same day? Some gay is using their wishes all up at once.

*once again, points at sign*

The First 1/3 Is The Steepest! (1/3 of the way through the Munros at long last. That’s a wrap for 2025, unless any smaller hills present themselves.) @walkhighlands.co.uk #BinneinMor #NaGruagaichean #Mamores #MunroBagging #FridayNight🥳

Guth nan eun gar dùsgadh bho chadal, àillidh, ciùin Moch is deiseil 'son an t-slighe The voice of the birds Awakening us from the sleep of peace Early and prepared for the journey

Alex Cole-Hamilton has promised Scotland a fortnight in Magaluf, but separation would risk this. Broad shoulders.

My darling, my darling, who knew? My darling, I miss you My darling, who knew? Who knew?

There’s bluebells growing under the trees And I will be there in June I will walk back down the river To some unknown salvation

Madainn Di-haoine 's an dùthaich fo sgòth 'S mi sgìth le cuid smalan, mi-mhisneachd is bròn Friday morning and the country is under a cloud But I am tired of sorrow, pessimism, and gloom

Rapture's off. Sorry.

“World Champions” not having the best week eh.

I hope he knows he's getting voted out next time like all these miserable party liners who are clinging desperately to the ghost of New Labour and refusing to admit they are in a right wing party

My MP replied to my email about free speech/Gaza and conveniently now that Palestine has been recognised as a state by the UK he DOES think it's bad to genocide it. Unfortunately due to secret reasons he can't tell me Palestine Action IS definitely v dangerous, just like Keir Starmer says.

Happy 30th Anniversary Of Tony Yeboah At Selhurst Park to all who celebrate x 🥳

Weird how this keeps happening.

Glasgow office just emailed me like, "does this belong to anyone in here?" #AccidentalPartridge

Scones. Yeah you can get them in Tesco 4 for £1 now, but a proper scone should be served as part of a pretend-posh afternoon cream tea, like I had as a kid in Guernsey (actually yeah - just “Guernsey”).

the rapture is in beta testing right now so you’ll need an invite code from someone who’s already there

Hold my soul Let it carry me

CONFIRMED: An independent Scotland will have no Clattenburg. UK OK.

“I voted No. My step-brother voted No, and their mother‘s sons before them. When will Lorna Slater listen?” Searing stuff as Wes Streeting berates Andy Murray over the sneaky Nat plot to cancel DAB radio signal.

Do you think of me? Do you wish that I would slow down? Are there some things that you've seen That feel like home now? Are you up there climbing trees Singing brand new melodies? I hope you are, I know you are

With the eyes of a child The wonder of it all I used to search the stars at night And I felt so safe and small

Nuair a thuiteas oidhche orm 'S e 'n t-àm as miosa a th' ann When night falls It is the worst time of all

Retrospectively removing indefinite leave to remain would be immoral and economically damaging. It would tear families apart. Attacking it as ‘potentially illegal’ is completely beside the point. Argue with the (awful) idea. Don’t try ’well, actually you can’t do that’.

Today my child fell ill again, my wife’s work announced voluntary redundancies and a N***l F*****g F****e launched plans to deport my family for no reason. Antidepressants: what antidepressants?

it is unreal how much can actually be accomplished by clearing *literally the lowest bar of engagement* instead of just going full deer in headlights. there’s power in that and it’s a muscle you flex. and once you’re bored of clearing the lowest bar, clear the next, then the next, then the next.

In the last 20 years, the greatest improvement in sport has been the growth of the women’s game in football, cricket and rugby. Long may it continue.

I love how Chris Mason's picture on his Wikipedia page looks like he's watching an illegal cockfight in a barn in Essex. Horrified, but slightly aroused and unable to stop looking.

Me on the way to the rapture. #FFSAlly

BREAKING: France recognizes a Palestinian state at a United Nations meeting to revive the Mideast peace process.

I cannot emphasize this enough: The regime has overextended itself. It is vulnerable to protest and dissent. They have not consolidated power and we are entirely capable of keeping them from doing so. Doomers are not realists.

The official statement from Disney says that they've had "thoughtful conversations with Jimmy" and don't even vaguely mention that he's sorry for anything which is a giggle.

"I'm cancelling your show ... for a week!"

Never mind

Delighted that I can revert to having no interest in Jimmy Kimmel.

The Walt Disney / ABC Company. funny

“I say nothing. I prefer simply not to speak. If I speak I will be in big trouble, big trouble, and I don’t want to be in trouble.” - Jose Mourinho, 2014.

I feel like a madman pointing this out but the plausible, real world explanation for the marked uptick in work visas after 2019 is quite simply that in the previous year, the UK blew up its entire labour market by getting rid of FOM, on which it was intrinsically and inherently dependent.

ITV4 have saved me from my Challenge TV Nigel Havers WFH Lunchtime Hell by showing the British Open snooker from Cheltenham. 🥹

we have gone from a world in which we were told not to cite wikipedia because it was unreliable to a world where wikipedia might be the only reliable source left on the internet and we all owe a lot to the pedantic nerds who got us there