NARRATOR: WE DID NOT IN FACT GET IT TOGETHER IN TIME

The hungry red panda at the Prospect Park Zoo? Adorable. The HungryPanda delivery app scamming small businesses? Not adorable. So they will be paying $580,000 back. We'll keep pursuing companies that take advantage of New Yorkers, and we'll keep asking if we can pet a red panda just for a second.

Rather than a suspension for fighting, Reynaldo Lopez and Jorge Soler should have to play with the Bananas for a game

It'd be much easier to be indignant about the club's pursuit of Roberto De Zerbi if @tottenhamhotspur.com were actually active on this platform the way they used to be. #NoToDeZerbi

Bottom of the UEFA rankings, top of the "places that look cool as hell when you google image search them" rankings

KITKAT HEIST

Most often, people hire me to draw clean, grayscale maps of real places. Sometimes, though, people hire me to draw fantasy maps for decoration, or for gaming. And every once in a while, someone will hire me to draw a fantasy-style map of a real places! #maps #fantasymaps

Even the weather knows that it's Opening Day

This is (I think) a Greater Blue-Eared Starling (Lamprotornis chalybaeus) & the amazing chrome job is their super-power. They've evolved to manipulate light in VERY specific ways, attracting mates, intimidating rivals. Let's look at the nanostructures that bring this bling into being.

Just play baseball. I miss the baseball. #MLB

Trojan horseable | adjective Describing a non-dating app that is effective for finding dates. Usage: “Zillow” is extremely Trojan horseable.

don't forget to leave a hot dog out on the counter tonight, or baseball won't leave you any presents

You forgot: historian/nerd who hyper focuses on a single subject.

But they were all deceived for a 5th loco was made

Paging @elliface.com

well this made me cry

please deposit $200B

I have a trans joke but I need two therapist letters to tell it

I am enjoying every part of Belfast except the food, which has so far ranged from acceptable to possibly a hate crime.

And Afroman won the case. 😁 Good, fuck the cops.

I feel…seen

This picture fills me with hope. Everything in the world sucks right now but seeing Lewis get his first #F1 podium and get to share it with Bono…I am hopeful. There are good things in this world.

wut

the girls!

we dare you to find a museum more ready

making a metal horse just to name it RoboClop

WiFi Burrito is the name of my Jonathan Colton cover band.

the reporter laughing is the icing on top

This is amazing; am watching on C-SPAN3. If she had a staff member who liked her, that person would've walked up to her 15 minutes ago to whisper in her ear to get out of there. But no one is protecting her. Any one of these attendees can break the news to her on live tv.

Marrying the concept of noodles.

A massive bloom of rimu berries in New Zealand fueled a mating surge among the critically endangered Kākāpō. spklr.io/6044E87xp 📸: New Zealand Department of Conservation

Scott Pilgrim creator Bryan Lee O’Malley on taking ‘another run’ with new game

alternatively their gender affirming strategic petroleum reserve

good advice whether about life and politics or about Tottenham Hotspur

bluesky: the headline

Battle of Fishguard day, lads!

Happy 40th old friend.

It was lost to the internet but once I got to cover a strip mall shutting down and it had Giant Supermarkets as an anchor so the hed was Giant, Dick's, Party City To Close

they should invent a cost of living that goes down

It is my birthday weekend and my spouse helped me achieve a dream. To squish and fold over an angel food cake into a single slice.

2026 basically

have you ever read one of my Discworld QOTDs and thought, hey, I should really get around to reading those books? good news! the full series is back on Humble Bundle - it’s Kobo but it’s pretty easily to transfer those to your preferred e-reader you won’t regret it

@elliface.com every day at work with customers

lol they aren’t letting people walk by the front of the White House on Presidents’ Day??