Congrats to Spain. A generational ham country. Ham as a fingerfood, ham as a meal. They earned that trophy in my book. The ham book, in this instance.

me & the bad bitches I pulled by being gay & annoying

no reasonable offer refused

If you live in a small town where “there are no politics“ but when you go to the city “everyone is going crazy” you do have politics and they are right wing politics - notes on explaining reality outside of the town of 1500 people your elderly relatives live in.

Shadow Force undefeated

okay i would like to apologize to the girl reading this. apparently i misunderstood the question and i will do better going forward

the worst movie i’ve ever watched in a theater? probably the girl reading this

Finally - let’s wrap this thing up and get out of here

All superbowl outcomes are rigged

You’re here to gaze upon my collection again?

The Sixteen Woke Men of Tain Devil Take the Wokest Woke Games Letters of Woke

just realized the central twist of The Prestige is the same as the tweet about feeding kittens to coyotes

Oh they’re MAD mad

calling pissing “peeing off”

both of these teams look like shit

This is the “I see London, I see France” and the loser gets depantsed

🎶I’m meeeeeeat Meatbaaaalllin’🎶

how your email finds me

Mamdani is turning out to be a great example of what a politician can achieve when they don't view their entire electorate with haughty derision

Riker would never

Sorry eBay seller… a private offer of 43 cents off is not enough of an inducement for me to pull the trigger on this item

Cultivating a studied attitude of mayonnaise apathy

supply chain issues leading to less calorie dense hamburgers? get real. like give me a fucking break. yank my fucking doodle. sure. fucking pepper me with gay little kisses on My tummy while precum dribbles out of my worthless little cock .spank me in a wedding dress ooooooookay sure pal be my guest

Ever since I was a young boy I wanted to dabble in being a fucking dick.

When I was in fifth grade I got my first guitar and my dad would make me play Supernaut on command. This messed my life up but also made me awesome

name this famous figure

I fell off a ladder working for a company with multiple OSHA violations and when I woke up I realized it was my own fault and workers should not have mandated protections

Hit in the head, sociopathy, but mostly raw selfishness. It’s not that complicated

every single aspect of israel is an affront to life www.middleeasteye.net/news/israel-...

sometimes i feel like i need to lock myself in a chamber

oh you’re an @orbgazer.bsky.social fan? name his worst take

some of y’all need to be put in here

The Taco Bell uprising is just beginning

my horny ❤️😉

either history of the world part 1 the Blues Brothers

are your kids texting about choogling????

The era of jute begins anew

it’s time for macrofibers

game day deals near me

If you say “gringx” your prejudice is showing THE END

I usually try to explain it like this: picture Tyler "Ninja" Blevins as Andrew Yang. Now imagine they're Klingon. Doesn't look so much like Evo Moment 37 was caused by chads wanging chung now, does it?

I talk to a lot of people, strangers, friends, colleagues etc. one thing that is largely consistent: I ask all the questions. rare is the moment that anyone asks me a single thing. conclusion: people really are mostly comfortable talking about themselves

Queen Romana wwuld have defeated Iran by now

I am Smooth Coke’s strongest soldier

new Hemingway short story just dropped

tired: "Jack Off Instructions" wired: "Special Topics in Jacking Off: Phenomenology and the Nature of Self"

Diarrhea (Taylor’s Version)