Before social media, you could just completely forget that certain people existed. I miss that.

28 years of cyclosporiasis testing Screwworms eradicated in the US in 1966. Measles eradicated in the US in 2000. All are back because of this science denying administration.

Robert Adderall

Interviewer: What are your top three strengths? Me: Aggressively questioning leadership, being breathtakingly sanctimonious, and having an elite ability to prioritise going home.

Extreme heat warning in my pants

I love the way the dentist gives you sunglasses to wear now they got me feeling like Bob Dylan up in this bitch

Read this 🔥

In Bluey’s society, would dingos be the criminals and murderers?

Mainstream Respectable opinion is that people joking about a bad person's death represents a culture of cruelty, but really it represents a culture of impunity. It's a coping mechanism for watching someone do evil their whole life and never seeing consequences

At a time when contraceptives could be banned, it can feel like there are only two camps: those who champion birth control and those who criticize it with hopes of making it go away. But there is a third camp: People scrutinizing birth control not to get rid of it, but to make it better.

THE MCCONNELL SITUATION MADE ONE THING CRYSTAL CLEAR, THE REPUBLICAN PARTY WOULD HIDE IT FROM THE AMERICAN PEOPLE IF TRUMP DIED 🤷 Post anything here: interactink.vercel.app

Have you noticed that some of the most effective ads for the Dems are written by the GOP? I love when they say the quiet part out loud! #AccountabilityIsComingNovember3rd

Me (Gen-x): *responding to a question of how I have been surviving the apocalypse*...it's really simple, I just always saw The Terminator as a documentary

Brooklyn craft beer packaging goes hard

Of course Lola Ebola isn’t my real name. It’s actually Lola Pussypoo. But that’s also not technically my “real” name because my grandfather changed it when he came to America. It used to be Vaginadung.

Not a single person has lost money on a Kamala Harris crypto scam.

Iranian negotiators just concluded a 20 minute phone call with Senator Mitch McConnell, and they’re ready to make a deal.

GOP Rep. French Hill has to explain the Constitution to a confused Maria Bartiromo

Here’s a compilation of Senile Satan’s imaginary Iran deals.

Phantom of the outback steakhouse

If these parents are actively refusing a vaccine, then they are actively engaging in the “after birth abortion” they’re bitching about. Where are the pro-life folks?!

*meredith brooks voice* im a mitch im mcconnell i help trump comma donald ive a turtle for a head im probably really dead

I believe that a working-class-coded progressive white dude with no problematic tattoos and who also is not a rapist both exists and could make a great senate candidate. But just to be safe, maybe we shouldn't let men run at all. shootmenintospace.com

♫ Islands in the stream ♫ That is what we are

It’s so odd that the United States is OK with *some* rapists in office, but not others. Shouldn’t we have a “NO RAPISTS” policy? Seems a rather low standard.

Called in sick to work because I’ve got a lot of work to do around the bed.

A hookup app for gay horses called stabl.

Somewhere out there, there is a little girl who was born during Covid named Ivy and it’s short for ivermectin.

Have an enema. Treat yo self.

I just saved a bunch of money on my car insurance by switching to arson.

Me: [dog dies in a movie] *crying* [human dies in a movie] Me: *still crying* Why did they have to kill that dog earlier?

"Now as I see my two beautiful sons sitting there, I think I'm going to give one to myself, one to them, and we'll have a threesome, okay?" ~ Donald Trump "My two beautiful sons"... sorry, Eric.

They are arresting U.S. Air Force Officers for free speech and U.S. Olympians for curiosity—but not rich men for raping children with Jeffrey Epstein.

Day off agenda: 1. Have two mimosas at brunch ✅ 2. Go get new photo for drivers license at DMV ✅ 3. Give crazy eyes in the photo ✅ DAMMIT

🎶so come on, come on, come onnnnnn and TAKE IT! Take another little piso mojado baby🎶

EYE OPENER 1943 U.S. Army film, Don’t Be a Sucker, was supposed to be a warning from history. Instead, the Trump administration has been treating it like an instruction manual.

Nobody showed up to my party so it was postponed until attendees could be paid to attend.

The Magic School Bus (Series, 1994 - 1997)

Reminder for Americans ~ Pedophilia: bad Laughing at the President who shits the bed every day: good

My husband took the kid to see Toy Story 5 and then he came home and mansplained the plot to me like I wouldn’t understand it otherwise.

You have to be a real cult member to believe this crap.

Crazy thoughts

What is this shit?!

If you see this, post a pic from your device with no explanation.

The company they hired to do the reflecting pool is called Greenwater Services. Incredible. Like dropping your pet off at Dogmurder Pet Boarding

the strait of hormuz needs to have regular, predictable open hours or frankly they are going to lose me as a customer

Future generations won’t ask what happened. They’ll ask who allowed this.

You're out of your fucking mind.

Just a reminder, the company you work for does not care about you. You could drop dead today while working and they will replace you in a short amount of time. I say this only because we collectively need to stop giving these companies all of our energy even when we’re off the clock.