I’ve hated mayonnaise since the first time I never tried it.

Great advice from one of the best.

My husband - who is a historian - said something last night that has been in my mind ever since. He said, "the epilogue of 1984 is written in English - not Newspeak. It's meant to let you know that this story is over and in the end, we won."

Everyone hates James Comey. If you’re going to start indicting your enemies, he’s a pretty smart one to start with.

🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨 JAMES COMEY NOT IN EPSTEIN FILES

Autism isn’t something you “have” like a disease or injury. It’s something you ARE, like your eye color or height. Next time you hear RFK Jr. speak, replace “autism” with “brown eyes” and see how it sounds. The only way to “cure autism” is to eradicate autistic people. Our lives are worth living.

The thundergod gets it.

We need to quit wasting time finding a scapegoat for autism, and instead focus all of our efforts on finding a cure for Dunning-Kruger.

Yes!!! If you’re a healthcare worker, or if healthcare is important to you, please consider attending! And give @physiciandemocracy.medsky.social a follow to be kept up to date on details. November 5th. Washington, DC. #HealthcareMarchOnWashington

MAGA: The left is the party of violent extremism!! Also MAGA: If an escalator stops we will SHOOT PEOPLE!!!!

Is there any place worse than a dystopia. I need to fill in my home address on a form.

COMING SOON:

BREAKING NEWS: TYLENOL RESEARCHERS FIND DISTURBING LINK BETWEEN DONALD TRUMP AND JEFFREY EPSTEIN

APPLAUD YOU COWARDS!!!

You guys. I think the rapture may have happened in 2016, but no one was actually worthy of rapturing.

HOUR 9: President Trump remains stuck on escalator, now yelling something about ending seven wars.

Soooo, the toughest and strongest leader in the world got stuck on an escalator? Sounds like something Eric would do.

Well that escalatored quickly.

People with autism are loved and valued. They are sons and daughters, fathers and mothers. They live with challenges and overcome hardships most of us can’t imagine. They are not an abomination in need of a scapegoat. And fuck every single person who would make them feel like they are. #YouAreLoved

Aw fuck. Does anyone know what time the rapture’s supposed to start. I figured it would be early so I slept in. Fuck I’m so late for work.

Never, in all his years practicing medicine.

He can’t. Fucking. Read.

So we have antivaxxers, now what are we calling these tylenol people? Antylenollers? Anticetominopheners? Or do we just stick with “morons”?

🚨BREAKING NEWS🚨: TRUMP TELLS TRUTH

The hell of it is that no matter how stupid this whole Tylenol thing is, Trump is going to claim he “cured autism”. Mark my words.

I can’t believe this needs saying, but don’t listen to these people. They are idiots. Tylenol is fine. Just take it as directed. Fucking idiots, all of them. #TylenolIsFine

Who is, MAGA?

If the rapture does happen tomorrow, those assholes better not expect us to pick up after them after they’re raptured out of their clothes up to naked Christian heaven. Do us heathens a solid and just stay home.

Trump. Dude. You wear a LOT of hairspray. Easy on the pyrotechnics, Michael Jackson. Or not. You do you.

Debates have rules. Debates allow time for questions, answers, and rebuttals. Debates are moderated in order to make sure the rules are followed. Charlie Kirk didn’t debate. Charlie Kirk argued. Children. For clicks.

Charlie Kirk’s quote about empathy, taken out of context, makes him look like an asshole. In context, it makes him look like an asshole AND a moron. It’s important that we take these things in context.

BREAKING NEWS: TRUMP ENDS WAR BETWEEN VULCAN AND TATTOOINE.

The only ones asking people to change their gender are the ones who oppose transgender care.

NEW: In a rare public appearance, Jack Smith spoke at length this week issuing a dire warning about Trump's weaponization of the Department of Justice. My latest: www.muellershewrote.com/p/new-jack-s...

If this were discovered in a leaked email and published in the New York Times, it might get more attention. But Trump just tweets it out, and most people move on with their day. This is blatant corruption. Blatant weaponization. It is undeniably an impeachable offense.

Justice is a dish best served through a slot in the door. #Felon47

There is no world in which it is normal for the president to publicly call upon his attorney general to hurry up and prosecute his political foes. It’s like the Watergate tapes but posted on social media. Let’s get a grip on what’s happening here.

Not a single honest person in this entire administration. Not one. Prove me wrong.

Star Wars - Antifa since 1977. #FuckDisney

Punishing college students for protesting him. Pressuring TV networks to fire late night talk show hosts for criticizing him. Suing newspapers for reporting he doesn’t like. If this were happening in another country, what would you call it?

Kirk is not a modern day St. Paul, despite what Cardinal Dolan says. The only thing that such myth-making achieves is fomenting resentment, curtailing dialogue, and stifling action to otherwise prevent this tragedy from happening again, says John Grosso.

If not for Antifa, this would be the current map of Europe.

Just curious, what’s the minimum amount of boat bombings you need for a Nobel peace prize. More than three? Asking for a fascist.