I always thought this summed it up best theonion.com/tubi-ceo-com...

Tubi is such a crazy streaming service. It’s like if the Criterion Closet was in a gas station

"Look, I know you don’t understand how I’m suddenly the guy making decisions about everybody’s kids when I look and talk like a guy who should never be around a kid ever again, but you need to know that I’m doing what’s best for your children."

'Warmth is for Sorry! This is not a hug. This is a chess clock in a stranger’s living room telling you your parents are getting divorced. The invitation is “Are you smart enough to sit at this table?”' As a childhood fan of this game, this is pure gold.

"To receive results as ten-second videos that present a sponsored product as the only possible answer to your question."

*youth pastor voice* Let me tell you kids about another carpenter who wasn’t very popular with the authorities

Lizza in Part 7: "So, it turns out she banged the drone"

I’m about 55% shitposting with this but I think there’s a pretty striking echo of history here: what is “local control” but “states rights” about a different sort of property? In this essay I will discuss the how the omnicause of John Brown the first YIMBY is still marching on…

Come for . . . whatever we're reading these installments for, and stick around for the #BookSky reference to a 1943 edition of BRENDA STARR, GIRL REPORTER!

not to put too fine a point on it but every one of these people—lizza and nuzzi, obviously, but also sundberg herself—are symptoms of the same problem, which is that larping as a journalist is orders of magnitude more lucrative than actually practicing journalism

Somehow this is the worst part. Yet again I'd like to thank the publishing industry, Hollywood, and Yale Law School for ensuring this bigot's rise to prominence.

ATTN: Warriors. Are you man enough to take the fall for Pete Hegseth?

“Christ did not die for the good and beautiful. It is easy enough to die for the good and beautiful; the hard thing is to die for the miserable and corrupt.” ― Shūsaku Endō, Silence

This is all true but 1) under no definition are we currently at war with Venezuela under domestic US law 2) since we aren’t, the initial strike was just as much a murder as the follow up The failure to understand this by a huge range of actors is really driving me up the wall.

So I don't think I have been posting as a healthy person since 2014 or thereabouts, so I regret to inform you that, when I am feeling good, I am very much Like This.

it’s so weird to look around and realize like, tech and media are materially worse than a decade ago

The White House’s new anti-media website includes denunciations of: -ABC, which bribed the president -CBS, which bribed the president and moved away from fact-based journalism trying to appeal to him and his fans -WaPo, which spiked a Harris endorsement and tilts coverage in Trump’s favor Fools.

Everyone stop, this is important

Here are the ones I've done since (1/5)

AI is in a race to find a revenue stream before people get bored and/or catch on. I actually would welcome automation for certain tedious tasks but formatting a spreadsheet isn’t sexy to investors. Making a movie from thin air* is. *slurry of plagiarized content

The crow king demands obsequiounce from his flock. His subject bows in genuflection before her king. She too had plucked a humble offering direct from the frame in hopes of having her petition heard. See more of the story in my feed #crows #crowking #art #artsky #bskyart #painting #animalart

RUN DON’T WALK - to #WakeUpDeadMan now in theaters! See my pinned post for a theater finder link 🎟️💀⏰🥰

wHy aREn'T PeOpLE sEeinG moVIeS aNyMORe?? I dunno, man, maybe because the last two movies I *really* wanted to see in the theater are only playing in, like, 5 theaters in a 50 mile radius and they all stink? Neither Frankenstein nor Wake Up, Dead Man are coming to my CITY, and I hate it.

My immediate thoughts on Wake Up, Dead Man: Holy fucking shit, Josh O'Connor really out-Hot Priested the Hot Priest

The Benoit Blanc trilogy might end up as one of the best artistic statements on the diseased conservatism of our era, and l think Wake Up Dead Man is my favorite of the trilogy, largely because it’s Rian Johnson trying to understand Christianity and its adherents more than having a definitive take.

i know WHY this is but that just makes it even more of a kick in the pants lmao

What I really want is Muppet Pride and Prejudice with Miss Piggy as Mrs Bennet.

rian you don't owe us anything as an artist and you should be true to yourself and only put out the work that you want the world to see i genuinely believe this having said that what the fuck dude

Am I a hypocrite for wanting this after giving a hard no to muppet knives out

He is risen

when trying on pants, do this in the store. then tell the sales associate "the menswear guy told me to do this." IG mr.funkys0ul

Stuck on this new poem I'm writing.

"We have zero strong evidence that they do but we now have to leave the door open because our former addict, uneducated, brain worm boss needs to continue his grift"

I would not, could not, in my docs Please get out of Firefox I would not, could not, on the phone Please just leave my calls alone I will not, will not, even free LLMs, just leave me be!

Good one for this

I cannot express how much the team of @crabitha.slutmo.de and @musicalhistorian.bsky.social have improved my day. #yassifiedsquidward Thank you.

The only guarantee of peace in Europe is a Ukrainian victory over russia.

VACCINES DO NOT CAUSE AUTISM, YOU FLAMING SHITBIRDS. THE LAST TIME HHS, AS CURRENTLY OCCUPIED BY RFK JR., CONDUCTED A “COMPREHENSIVE ASSESSMENT” OF THE CAUSES OF AUTISM THEY BLAMED TYLENOL AND THEN, BECAUSE IT WAS BULLSHIT, HAD TO WALK IT BACK.

“Baby, it’s worm inside.”

I feel it’s important that people remember the “worm in my brain” thing was used in divorce proceedings as an attempt to lower the amount of money he would give his wife and, after she killed herself, suddenly wasn’t a worm.

reposting this a lot

"I hated the idea of an intruder therein" is the worst sentence in the entire language.

i—