You know what tho

ooooh temu figured out it's now shorthand for "cheap off-brand garbage" and is not happy about it

i am going to assassinate tilly norwood

Oh my God they announced it like when John Lennon got shot during Monday Night Football

estrogen is magic 🩷

I honestly hope proponents of AI keep fuckin proponing it. I think a huge reason why it's so unpopular is because every person who likes it is either the most racist burnout from your highschool or your boss who sold his mortal soul for 150k/yr

Paradise - what a pilot! Wow! - Ryan

I believe I am going to go insane

Oh, cool! It looks like fucking shit. Thanks 👍

solidarity with all the children out there throwing tantrums. stay strong. you WILL get what you want

Look I love The Pitt but if I had a coworker who mentioned his upcoming vacation every fucking hour of his last shift he wouldn’t survive to see it

Kristi Noem’s face on a beautician’s mannequin like that lady’s wig in Weapons

one of us should really become a motorcycle person and say “yeah… decided to ride the bike in today…” to nobody every single week

Look I love The Pitt but if I had a coworker who mentioned his upcoming vacation every fucking hour of his last shift he wouldn’t survive to see it

Kristi Noem’s face on a beautician’s mannequin like that lady’s wig in Weapons

I can't be the only one who at this point would be more interested in the White Lotus corporate offices, following a harried PR staff trying to paper over three high-profile and grisly deaths at their resorts in as many years

@brenthor.bsky.social my wife and I are currently doing a BSG rewatch and last night we got to your avi's big episode so every time I see him today I give ol' Tigh a little wink

[peter gibbons voice] I wouldn't exactly say I've been "worrying," Bob www.thedailybeast.com/trump-79-dis...

A visibly tired woman opens her door to find a Marine in full dress. "No," she says through tears. "Ma'am..." "No... is it my son? Is it my boy??" He removes his hat. "There will likely be more. That's the way it is," he says as he draws air through his teeth. "Likely be more."

Becoming a drag king called Gary Bussy

Just remembered I got really stoned and made exactly one TikTok video over a year ago and then never logged in again lol

This clip of the lad Josh Rocks throwing a piping hot 9-darter on his premiere league debut in front of an absolute raving mad home town Belfast crowd goes so hard. My wife asked if I was okay after I watched this

you cannot expect me to take any story about Anthropic seriously when this man is clearly Phil Jennings running some sort of covert russian op

"Ooh honey it says we're staying in the 'E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial' suite... why are you making that face?"

in video game parlance we'd call this a re-spec. hell i'd do it. hell you'd do it too

thinkin about thos pencils

'Yo Donnie thanks for doing that. Random thought: if you're ever thirsty you should try having a couple of those caffeinated Panera lemonades. Trust me'

with all respect to anyone who died on one, i believe the very first few seconds of beyond tortured on a rack would feel pretty good! again, with all respect

Lots of good options - gotta go with “Let me grab my toolbox - AKA WALLET”

Just remembered I got really stoned and made exactly one TikTok video over a year ago and then never logged in again lol

you know Stan Kasten? The super-rich, super-successful president of the super-rich, super-successful LA Dodgers? Wanna know how he got into sports management? It's gonna piss you off a little. www.patreon.com/posts/stan-k...

in this post I explain the thing @ryansimmons.bsky.social and I are making which I am very very excited about

olympic hockey overtime rules - three skaters per side - first goal wins - rink shrinks by 20% every two minutes

working on a @secretbase.bsky.social piece with @sethrosenthal.bsky.social that heavily features Ted Turner -- here's an archival clip w/ a british reporter who reminds him he doesnt have the money to buy CBS and ted basically responds "well yall got your ass kicked in dunkirk and bounced back" lol

Getting taken to the blue tent in a Bellagio ballroom. Giving the thumbs up while I get carted past the Wheel of Fortune slots

working on a @secretbase.bsky.social piece with @sethrosenthal.bsky.social that heavily features Ted Turner -- here's an archival clip w/ a british reporter who reminds him he doesnt have the money to buy CBS and ted basically responds "well yall got your ass kicked in dunkirk and bounced back" lol

the youtube equivalent of "UGH -- you gotta smell this"

oh you think white people don't have culture? what about this sickly family of incestuous warlords from a book i didn't read?

Due to equal time rules Masturbating Bear must immediately be followed by a human cranking it as well

Me: I mean, why are there so many lights? And so noisy? Why are the doors so complicated? Look I’m not trying to be rude here but everything is wet. Everything. I’m just trying to understand why it’s like this. Alien whose ship I’m on: toss this one back

DIRECTOR: Now for the last bit, did you add a “WHOLE MILK” graphic to clarify that the milk they’re drinking together in the indoor grotto is whole? EDITOR: sure did boss, real fuckin cummy just like you asked DIRECTOR: good. I wanted it cummy

did a think youtu.be/z19Bzjqxeb8?...

Smoking on that shit that made god say "I'm gonna make a whole family of american royalty whose thing is violent public tragedies, except for the grossest guy, who is immortal"

introducing my column about resistance in fiction for @aftermath.site. I’m calling it THE WORK aftermath.site/oscars-revol...

Spending some time in the lab working on what I'm calling the Epstein Index. Basically you take the number of leaders in a business/institution with JE connections and divide by the total size. Helpful for job searches, school applications etc. Tesla's Epstein Index: moderate. Harvard's: sky high

a big thank you to helldivers' anti-cheat for borking windows so badly i had to do a clean install. modern gaming is 15% gaming and 85% feeling like samuel l. jackson in jurassic park, and frankly, i love it!!!

It's somewhere around :18

Can’t believe they let me in the Criterion Closet!