I’ve watched enough mafia movies to know that if you’re gonna shakedown a pillar of the community, you do it in private, you make it clear they’re not to tell anyone, maybe you put a couple of your goons on the front door so no one comes in. Because it’s shameful. You don’t do it on live television

Not my home, but I know my way around.

“Have you said thank you once? Just say thank you” is what abusers say.

Rage, Riot, Resist I'mma make a wooden sign for my new cabin. Right above the front door. And, I'm going to make it huge.

i made it. i didn’t buy anything today. i saved america [reading headlines] ah fuck

Today, my home address changed from Indianapolis, IN, USA to a plot in a Russian colony. And I didn’t even have to move.

Super stoked for the ides of March this year for some reason idk 👉👈

THEM: you look tired ME: I am tired THEM: oh right because of the… ME: the horrors yeah THEM: right right, that’s right

So, AP & Reuters were excluded but, TASS was there. Tell me again it's not ruzzia ruzzia ruzzia.

Alexa release the Kracken

So FauxNews gets the last of silent gen and boomers in an uproar, feeding them fear, changing it to hate, and these fuckers who won't be cannon fodder cheer them on. War! We'll MAKE other countries do our bidding. Meanwhile it's my sons and daughters who could be called up to be blown apart.

When calling your reps, make sure they know we're okay to primary the shit out of them. Those who squall "We won't have the numbers! We'll lose.", what have we won?! Our reps are doing the bare minimum, and their reps are doing all to please their king.

I've spent years learning old home remedies. Mostly because for most of my adult life, I was uninsured. I had to figure it out. RFK is embarrassing, and I'm hesitant to mention tinctures and herbs because I don't want to be lumped in with his ilk. But, now I'm glad of this knowledge. I may survive.

aint no way we cut medicaid and housing assistance so jeff bezos could buy this shirt

this is the face of a man who is about to end the bird flu epidemic by eating every infected bird

I'm so glad I'm not on the side where I have to think national parks are bad to stay on the team.

MSNBC left casual racism behind and went competitive.

It seems there was a dinner at the WH where a military choir serenaded the orange turd and his guest with a rendition of One Day More from Les Miserables, and the ignorant fools loved it. This is what happens when you don’t read. People mock you to your face. 😹

Grimly fascinating read. Sadists R Us leading the US federal govt.

Stop normalizing the grind and normalize whatever this is

suspiciously, our cats and dogs are both refusing to respond to the all household email How Many Naps Did You Take Last Week

Roads? Where we're going, we don't need roads. *picks you up on a lawn mower*

When Jesus Christ came upon the Earth, you killed Him. The son of your own God. And only after He was dead did you worship Him and start killing those who would not. — Tecumseh, Shawnee #NativeAmericanWisdom

Serious post: I'm at my son's tonight. He asked because his long time girlfriend took their 2 kids out of state to be with an online guy. I'm so proud he asked me to help his dark thoughts not overwhelm him. If you ask for help, you are SO not a burden. Please ask.

Hey, hey! I found our next FAA director.

Dear Manager, this week 1) I walked 500 miles 2) and then I walked 500 more 3) I did it just to be the one who walked 1000 miles 4) then fall down 5) was it at your door? I feel like it was at your door

DOGE is like if Fyre Festival was a government agency.

But has anyone seen them together? I think not.

The new Legislation Nursing Wing is nearly ready. No more finding dementia patients of Congress out in the wild.

*rides off into the sunset* *returns to get an iced coffee*

Carmen Sandiego got Waldo a new sweater for Christmas, and now they're living in peaceful anonymity in Bognor Regis.

Reminder: Zelenskyy refused to leave Kyiv as bombs fell. Donold hid in a bunker from protesters with cardboard signs.

I don't want to hope for a brighter tomorrow, I want to be the reason tomorrow's already on fire

Day 2 of the sweat-inducing, gut churning, razor blades in my belly. Diverticulitis is just rude.

Oh that moment when I realized I'm tossing one-liners back and forth, cackling like a loon because I'm being cheeky and this guy is the straight man... it's great... Um, he's been serious. He's a Jesus Junkie. Not just religious, uber-religious. And, I've been poking him! 😬 Sorry, dude.

Video showed an "elegant sink plug". I was waiting for the elegant pink slug. I'm not okay.

PSA: I've had so much rice lately, I'm fighting a diverticulitis flare. 😭 So far, my method has averted a full flare twice. I'm trying again. Take 4 charcoal capsules, then a full serving of metamucil (I usually take half dose if needed). Seems to tone down and remove the junk causing inflammation.

Being in law school this semester must be so surreal lol

By age 45 you should have: • A favorite chair • Dangerously high cholesterol • Shirts older than some of your coworkers • Constant but manageable despair • Reported a scrolling “Select Your Birth Year” wheel as a hate crime • Lost the ability to recognize that 1999 wasn’t, like, last year

"Chips and salsa while you wait" should be a thing everywhere, not just Mexican restaurants. Trip to the bank? Chips and salsa. Oil change? Chips and salsa. Therapy session? CHIPS. AND. SALSA. You can't tell me we don't deserve this after the last few years.

Darth Vader storming through the Death Star turning off lights mumbling about we ain't lighting the universe

remember how during lockdown, we declared 7pm was “we all scream out our windows all at once” time can we bring that back, I am getting really tired holding all this screaming in my heart

Pita bread made. It's delicious but still didn't puff. Oh, well. Spicy Butter Chicken, jasmine rice, and Indian stir fried veggies for supper. May do a spice cake for dessert if there's time. Should be since I prefer it warm. Still dying inside while they watch FauxNews, but headphones are nice.