That is not the face of a man embracing the tech lol

If this year was a YouTube video I’d be tapping the screen to see how much longer is left every like 7 seconds rn

Terrifying how far down this is on my list of things to worry about

No harsher reminder that you bought the cheap winter coat instead of the expensive winter coat than when it gets COLD cold out

There are just so so many ways to get in touch with me these days and yet

Awww thank you for thinking of us but we’re good

5 under-the-radar Christmas movies: Better off dead The Ref Gremlins Batman Returns In Bruges

Well things are finally looking up wait no that’s just the child mortality rate my bad

Remember: if you surround yourself with people who don’t like cherry cordials then you can totally have their cherry cordials

The everything bagel is the nature valley bar of the bread world

8:30: leave for work 8:32:

Screenshotting so many recipes I’m never gonna make right now you guys

Well it's Sunday. And you know what happens on Sunday? Show-and-tell happens on Sunday! So show us something you made or found, somewhere you've been, something you're proud of, family, pets... anything neat, really! Go on Show us!

It is somehow both the first day of winter and also the 10,000th day in a row that I haven’t felt the warmth of the sun

I hate when one of my pets shows up wet for some reason and then I’m all “gross why are you wet” and they’re just like “idk bro that’s a you problem now, could be a lot of things”

This is so important

Would like to redact this whole goddamn year tbh

Do you know how many fucking printer refills it would take to print all of that

🦅

Nobody is more surprised to be sneezing than my husband who is allergic to cats and also owns two cats

This. This is the post. My god.

Sorry you lost me at “you better not cry”

Somebody said the U.S. has big “dying mall” energy right now and I can’t stop thinking about his accurate that feels

It doesn’t take much to radicalize me like I would literally burn it all down just to stop bean bunny from shivering

“AI used as much water as the water industry this year” is fucking wild

This is your yearly reminder that today (December 20th) is the last night most of us can drink and not be hungover on Christmas morning

Well now every Christmas I’m gonna want to watch Jake Paul get his jaw broken. I love creating new traditions.

This but both the toddler and his mom are just my autistic ass

Please take that dog home he just wants to finish his book

Never meet your heroes

Does anyone have a good gif of Jake Paul getting knocked out yet because it might just fix me

The truly great writers have a way of explaining your own feelings to you:

One man’s bug is another woman’s feature

2025 came in like a lion and is going out like a toddler making up the rules to a boardgame they’re forcing you to play

Not sure how I’m supposed to be expected to get any work done in these conditions

In closing, I fw you for real and appreciate being considered for this opportunity

Having introvert friends is great because even if you make plans by accident you can always be all "hey I checked the forecast and it's supposed to be really late out tonight" and then they'll be like "yeah you shouldn't be out in weather like that" and then nobody has to leave their blanket cocoons

If somebody could tell 2025 it’s supposed to be winding down that would be great

He walked so baby yoda could run

"Think not of the books you've bought as a "to be read" pile. Instead, think of your bookcase as a wine cellar. You collect books to be read at the right time, the right place, and the right mood." - Luc van Donkersgoed

The way this would fix me

More of this energy in the news cycle thx

Everybody calm down I’m sure nothing weird is gonna go down here

Getting excited super early for Christmas and getting excited super early for Halloween stem from two very different kinds of childhood baggage and some of us have both

Parents are amazing because if somebody asked me for help with their math homework right now and I looked down and saw long division I’d just cry

If you don’t want kids PLEASE don’t go using some baby’s fat little foot as a pretend telephone, that’s like the parent gateway drug

Hey guy, telling your computer to tell my computer to tell me to touch more grass probably isn’t the W you were hoping for

This is what’s known as a generation gap

I need just like one day where things don’t cost money