Oh I would fuck these SO hard. I need them CARNALLY.

Looking for a Hootie bar while I'm in town

Yo @gvaughnjoy.bsky.social, have you looked into post-Christmas movie watching traditions? It seems like the LOTR series is the go-to for some. What does it meeeean?

Dang Zootopia 2 is about urban renewal

I go to get in bed at night and this heaux is like

these are my emotional support 20 different shampoos and conditioners that i hate

Do other countries have this weird notion that you’re not a “real” representative of the nation if you live in an urban center? Like do the French say Parisians aren’t really French? Are you considered not a real German if you live in Berlin? Or is this mainly a weird American thing?

The Little Engine That Fucks

BREAKING: Explosions felt across New York City as full socialism begins

sneak peek of my new 2026 look and attitude

My position has been quite consistent over time. The Urals are little more than a speed bump

Yo but wtf are we talking about "Because of his height, once he passes his exam, he will need not only a custom car but a custom uniform and a special-order gun to fit his hands." Now I'm gonna have to spend the next hour researching how they make guns for giants

I, @bzooty.bsky.social, being of sound mind, willfully and voluntarily make this declaration to be followed if I become incompetent. This declaration reflects my firm and settled commitment to get sleepy on the couch tonight.

This really shows how much one of the intended effects of a cathedral was to make it look like a forest

grinDING

Your own Conical Santa

𝒀𝒖𝒆𝒏𝒈-𝒂-𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑯𝒆𝒂𝒓 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎 𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈

Y’all might not appreciate it, but it took him 87 moves and 14 hours to get here

Bong Island Iced Tea

Scizzor Zone is a beauty salon 😞 not a scissor store

TWELVE… THOUSAND DAYS

christ mas... TWELVE DAYS

Someday I will move back to Harrisonburg, so all of my friends need to prepare accordingly.

Twin Lakes Polka? Daj Mi Buzi Polka, AKA Kiss Me Polka? Polka Twist?

Polka King of the Midwest?

One of my favourite little tidbits in all this is that many people learned this line from the Muppet Christmas Carol because of Gonzo's amazing line-read, but don't know he's literally quoting the original story:

The subject of my sermon at Midnight Mass tonight is the animals of the stable, often overlooked by preachers in my experience

Automatic bzooty, zero to tutti-frutti 𝘥𝘶𝘩

🎄In sin and error pining 🫦

When they ask me what radicalized me

Visiting Greensboro

A mobile shrine for pilgrimage has been built. A tabernacle for the chosen to worship, perhaps? Where is the reliquary? Anyway, hire more religion reporters.

The best place to find an ancient labyrinth? It’s India, not Crete. “A classical 15-circuit labyrinth — the largest such circular maze-like structure discovered in India… — has been found” dating to ca. the 1st century & revealing the many trade & cultural links w/ Ancient Rome #GlobalAntiquity

genuinely love that time of year when getting a beer is a whole festive spectacle

A friend told me he'd been clearing out his gran’s house. One thing he found there was this knitted effigy of the man who had run off and abandoned my friend’s pregnant aunt. Into the effigy had been stuck one knitting needle for every year since the man had vanished. I wonder how he is doing.

Bobby "Boris" Hill

Whatever make it 10 factor authentication.. I don't want to be able to sign into anything ever again

The man, himself.

Pleasanton, Kansas Pop: 1,162 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pleasanton,_Kansas Images: https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=89114441 https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=17982814

gochujang hexapede

Oh fuck yeah, that's the stuff

I thought of you as my mountaintop I thought of you as my peak I thought of you as everything I had but couldn't meep

for the boys