His mother was mummified just like Norman Bates’ mum The UK Sun hopefully used a play on “mummified mum” in their headline As far as frauds go, this one is pretty interesting. Ah Italy, you give the world so much people.com/man-dresses-...

🚨mini rant incoming🚨 if you ever swim laps at a municipal pool, and it’s busy so you’ll need to share a lane ALWAYS ASK IF IT’S OK BEFORE ENTERING SOMEONE’S LANE BECAUSE THAT’S POLITE, AND IF THE PERSON ALREADY IN THE LANE IS SWIMMING BACKSTROKE, ANOTHER PERSON SUDDENLY THERE IS JARRING++

By accepting the pardon those turkeys are admitting to culpability

the sleepiest sausage

istfg these schmucks have learned NOTHING

JD Vance fucks the turkey on Thanksgiving

everyone is a pedophile now, donald trump normalization process underway

Partner was just showing me a clip from our fave UK mathematician & science celeb Hannah Fry. In the clip, she was offering a simple explanation of worm holes and time bending. Then I proceeded to tell S/O that the same explanation was provided in A Wrinkle In Time, and I’d known it since 7th grade

why would turkeys eat beef

Hegseth seems to be having difficulty demonizing the astronaut whose wife was shot in the face

Just a friendly reminder as we go into the holidays: Folks don't have to explain to you why they don't drink. If you offer them a drink and they decline, don't ask them why. It's not your business. Just offer them something without alcohol to drink instead. And move on.

I love Christmas and normally I'd be getting so excited right about now, but this year I'm a little down because it's our first holiday since we lost Fergus. I'm hoping I can spread some cheer and regain a little spirit myself by raising some funds for our local shelter! givebutter.com/n5l31M

Perfect semicircle achieved.

Damn. Was fortunate enough to work on a couple of shoots with Udo, and chat with him at a couple different festivals. He was kind, patient, weird, profane and all kinds of interesting but definitely one of a kind. Pouring one out for a real one.

Democrats when they want people to vote for them: HERE IS A BUNCH OF PROMISES WE WON'T KEEP! Democrats when people still voted for them, but Democrats lost, and then something bad happens in their state: HAHA GET FUCKED LOSER THAT IS WHAT YOU GET

UNITED HEALTH: All these seniors we’re dropping should invest in our stock so we can deliver shareholder dividends to them and they can shop for a better Medicare Advantage plan TRUMP ADMINISTRATION: Hey, that’s a great idea!

How does he manage to look even more frightening when he smiles?

getting older means you have to plan when and how much you can drink of any liquid before venturing out into the world of few bathrooms, because your bladder is toast

United Health wants its ‘swagger back’. How? By dropping a million seniors from Medicare Advantage Why? America's largest insurer wants to improve its profit margins, medical costs are skyrocketing because the GOP cut Medicaid and ACA subsidies.

Top 5 "Star Wars" Movies, Definitive List: 5. "A New Coma" 4. "The Wisdom of Space Muppet" 3. "Revenge of the Return" 2. "Space Bikini" 1. "I Am Your Father"

I hope there's an editor's note informing readers that Amazon sells tons of paper towels

Me: All done with my boundaries! Therapist: okay those are walls

To be fair, she had the day she deserved

give this man a little house and he IMMEDIATELY turns into a "get off my lawn" guy

Destroying Blue Sky for good with a 'still posts on Twitter' labeller.

If Bluesky won’t let us lock accounts then we should be able to opt out of being on the discover tab Bluesky: we changed the icon

Amessage from mydear friend Ghadeer:The burden living under genocide unbearable.Ifeel like crying all time.Depression destroying me,Ican't help myfamily get back on their feet.No matter what Ido,Ican barely breathe.Ghazal needs your support: milk,diapers,warm clothes tinyurl.com/save-my-baby...

Seven years ago today, I live tweeted my proposal to my wife! In honor of that, I’m going to repost the proposal so it’s here on Bluesky 🫶🏻

my problem with gyoza is that they normally come in an order of about 6, but what I really need is 100 of them

We got like five years until this is also a slot machine

Joining the war on Christmas on the side of drugs

How To Read A Book: 1: Buy a Good Book 2: Keep It Handy 3: When You Want To Look At Your Phone For No Reason, Read The Book Instead #TheMoreYouKnow

sir. what happened

How does he manage to look even more frightening when he smiles?

As we speedrun toward a future that leaves food safety to chance, re-live the national crisis that was the cranberryless Thanksgiving of 1959.

getting older means you have to plan when and how much you can drink of any liquid before venturing out into the world of few bathrooms, because your bladder is toast

Never get involved in a land war in Asia, Charlie Brown.

Someday, a real rain will come and wash all this scum off the streets, Charlie Brown.

on my way to gobble your girl

this is exactly the required stance for doin’ the Time Warp but somebody should tell RFK Jr’s Brain Worm that a Steak n Shake isn’t a Rocky Horror midnight movie

"You'll be visited by three spirits." The three spirits;

The editors at The Atlantic opened their mouths to RFK Jr's harvest. He issued an on-the-record statement: "Drink from me, Love." And they did, offering him a rosary bead as a prop for his dreamy cover photo.

The holiday sucks but the episodes are good! Bob's Burger's Thanksgiving Episodes ranked! the-undead-library.ghost.io/ranking-the-... (if you like this please consider signing up, I will try to have a better more consistent schedule next year)

TFW you realize you aren’t in the group text

Retrospect, Keith Haring 1989

Maybe I’m a simpleton, but I’m enjoying seeing all the Charlie Brown content today on “Trending” Important to fall back on the classics when the week ahead is hard

Here's my strip for the @peanutscollab.bsky.social redraw project! Happy 75th anniversary, Charlie Brown! This is the strip that originally ran on February 15th 1991 - my birthday! Shouts out to @waggtoon.bsky.social for putting this together! I had a blast with the lettering.

The real and true story of why Police Squad (the TV series Naked Gun was based on and easily the funniest tv show of its time) was canceled is legitimately insane and one of the most egregious examples of TV malpractice I’ve ever heard:

when i was a kid i attended a lot of martial arts classes, honestly because i loved action movies so much and i remember the best guy i ever saw at doing that whole business was this sorta short ugly rat man with 0 charisma. wish someone would make an action movie centered around him