Happy birthday to one of my favourite haters, Charles Darwin

had a nostalgic '90s experience today (laid on the floor and cried because i was too tired)

Chadwick Boseman and James van der Beek both died in their 40s of an illness that's treatable if a colonoscopy catches it but almost no insurer covers them for people under 45, this is what Engels meant by "social murder"

Found an additional graphic that gets even more of these quotes together. I've kept "I hate myself, I hate clover, and I hate bees" pinned above my desk since I first started studying evolutionary biology as an undergraduate. So relatable to get extremely frustrated with your study system.

well i for one couldn’t be more excited for the possibilities of AI. finally a technology that answers the age old question ‘what if clippy was wormtongue’

I hear a lot of people saying that ai makes art accessible.. well I personally think that's bullshit- so I made this to drive my point home. #regalsart #illustration #fuckai #digitalart

i think about this constantly. tradwife culture absolutely is a kink and no one will acknowledge that it's basically a 24/7 BDSM arrangement but done in an extremely unsafe and dangerous way.

"Fight against being ass" is a message that more people need to receive, tbh

Our product can show you what's outside the window that's right next to you, perform a Google search slower than you can yourself, and misinform your surgeon mid-procedure, causing a catastrophic failure that will injure you for life. The entire economy is propped up on it

GOOOOOOOD MMMMORNING 🌞🆙💖 NIGHT CITYYYY 🏙️🏙️🏙️ yesterday's body count lottery ☠️☠️☠️ rounded out at a 💪💪💪 solid and STURDY THIRTY 💪💪💪 ten outta heywood 😌😌😌 thanks to unabated gang wars 🔫🔪🩸 one officer down 🐷☠️🚨 so i guess that means you're all scuh-rewed! 😱😱😱

BLOATED CORPSE OF A DRUNK - You really dropped the ball, Harry. Four point six billion people -- and you failed every single one of them. You really *fucked up*.

While many of you are likely yelling "GO PATRIOTS" or "GO SEAHAWKS!" I'm yelling "GO ROBERT MUELLER and the rule of law!"

“Mr. Beast Salesforce ad” - they’re calling it the least appealing phrase ever assembled in any language. They finally did it

two queens maximizing their joint slay

listen to me. listen. i don't have much time. you have to get weirder and more esoteric. hornier too if possible. you have to become a bigger freak with nicher interests so nothing you love will ever end up in a super bowl commercial.

two years left until this happens to all of us

okay. so. fuck everything. if this is still in stock on payday, it’s mine.

okay so unfortunately you do all need to send me good vibes for my root canal tomorrow morning.

E

the human body should shed all its teeth and regrow a completely new set every 15 years. i should not have to live with the consequences of little sarah's rock candy addiction.

i am a professional editor. i come highly recommended. mind if i step inside your comments-on google doc for the NEOPETS RPG

It's been 15 years since the viral exchange between the mayor of Detroit and a "random dude in Massachussets" which ultimately led to this 11-foot tall bronze RoboCop statue that finally debuted two months ago!

I sincerely hope that JD Vance gets this reaction every single place he goes.

Cillian Murphy stuns in the “Opalite” music video by Taylor Swift.

guess who’s getting a root canal

[ swiftie tweeting. i'm allowed bc i'm very ill and pathetic rn. ] obviously showgirl is not a top-tier album and i agree with every political criticism of tswift etc etc. but the opalite video made me smile SOOOOO big today. i really do feel quite affectionate toward her lame ass.

Might and Magic VII: For Blood and Honor (1999)

everyone please send me good vibes for my emergency dentist appointment in the morning. 🙏 🙏 🙏 either my crown is dislodged or something underneath it is inflamed. either way i have never experienced pain like this lmao.

I used to love computer it was my friend. Now I have hate in my heart

The pivot to video is a tax on women's time and dignity, I will die on this hill.

But it can buy rope!

All Elon ever wanted was for people to think he was funny. He tried to buy that by buying Twitter. It didn't work. He made some half-arsed memes. That didn't work either. He went onstage with Dave Chapelle. People booed so much he had a breakdown. Elon is sad because he isn't funny.

do you ever go back to a game with romance options and get massive ick from the character you adored the first time around

too much of fiction is dedicated to trying to convince everyone that being a immortal vampire with a huge rack would be sad actually

Journalism is a great industry to go into if you want to become speedrun becoming a Marxist.

My college roommate, who has been reporting on the Ukraine-Russia conflict for WaPo, was laid off in an active war zone.

THATS WHAT YOURE CALLING IT? ARE YOU SURE?

hi this is a shout-out to the 70-year-old woman who did my taxes today. annie got me a $200 refund when turbotax was trying to convince me i owed $1,500. her office is h&r&GOAT block to me.

Get worse soon, you chinless dust mummy

my dream princess dress is back in stock and i need you to PLEASE tell me not to buy it

This. And also "just start a paid newsletter" requires that you, yourself, are a BRAND that other people want to pay for! It's a possible niche for op-ed writers or culture. Most reporters are not that. Most reporters are names at the top of a news story you skip right past.

"rich dipshit owner doesn't understand the industry he's bought into and clumsily destroys what made it good" feels less like a narrative unique to the washington post and more like the music that's been playing in the background of all our lives for at least 40 years

One of the classic Westminster Dog Show bits for me is when the in-arena announcer describes the dogs as like "a courageous little clown and an ideal companion" while they're trotting around. More athletic competitions need that kind of real-time commentary.

If anybody thinks this is a joke

I'm worried that the broader public isn't really understanding the Epstein Files. The problem isn't that everyone in the files is a secret pedophile, it's that all the people are corresponding with him because they *don't care that he's a pedophile*. It's a story of elite impunity.

alternatively if these people won't admit their horniness and insist on shaping mainstream culture around their repressed fetishes, we need to get other kinks represented. elect hypo freaks to congress. forcefemme the navy.

i actually think that perverts who don't know they're perverts are among the major social problems of the 21st century. we got breeding kink guys sublimating their kink into christian nationalism instead of getting on nhentai and normies who become true crime addicts instead of just reading eroguro.

So many Epstein conspiracists are just chronic masturbators — in that they are not abusers, but they read about abuse for pleasure. They only "care" to the extent that uncovering or inventing increasingly salacious details stimulates their burnt-out, sensation-seeking brain with horror or outrage.