the easter bunny is my alter ego i use to infiltrate the hedgehogs friend group why do you think they call me the eggman

Metal and Sage started playing cops and robbers and now half the fucing egg carrier is on lockdown they've commandeered the deck guns sonic help

glad i never got sent to prison. grandad wrote a whole doomsday plan i wouldve drawn my own calvin and hobbes

scratch was programmed with openAI never again man

i made a new robot called the Egg Fucker

rouge said i have a bubble butt. its not a bubble you idiot. its a fucking egg.

i used grounders processor to program Sonic Free Riders worst mistake of my life.

they dont tell you this but in most of the games im flying around in the back holding the camera like lakitu

every day i build a new guy to get mad at

i fucking hate when my minions capture tails he just installed Doom on the Roboticizer

"i bet your favorite pokemon is exeggcute" its fucking magnemite which you'd know if yuo ever bothered to ask me about my life

just saw knuckles crush and snort a master emerald shard. he said the great emeralds powder allows him to feel. What the fuck

snively thinks he's funny calling it the "chaos gem-erald" i need to put him up for adoption

lost in the fucking special zone tripping over thes fucking orbs im never getting weed from Rouge again

"Don't put people in robot shells" and then they stay up all night watching Gundam suck off my balls

everyones like "why do you name your stuff after eggs" i don't know why do birds fly why does a bee be bees i went to college you idiot

somet times i go to the sonic drive in to get pissed off

i wont be told im "ruining the environment" by mother fuckers who do not own a toilet

why was it called Sonic Adventure. i was in there. I want things ffrom this life too.

ive infiltrated the knothole discord server.

pissed off that sally acorn is a princess. shes a chipmunk. im a grown man.

happy pride coconuts

this is my robots Scratch and Gronder i made them wrong on purpose as a joke