You may find it comforting to believe that somewhere in the ravages of space, perhaps billions of years ago, a civilisation embarked on an experiment so wildly dangerous that it destroyed them; & that the resulting shock wave is moving inexorably across the universe wiping out everything in its path

Called two gym bros 'swolemates' today so I'm posting this from inside a locker.

Entering my Michael Sheen phase of personal grooming.

This is the best shot I got of the two Bigfoot that stole my sammiches. The one on the left is Debbie. She punched me in my face. Twice.

send me your favorite songs, the ones you feel in your soul. highlight the lines that bruise you, the ones that glow. tell me how it feels in your body, in the pause after the chorus or the build to the bridge. just two people passing headphones back and forth, like a confession

help me early retirement you're my only hope

hey so does anybody know how to like, function

another day full of hope potential disappointment caffeine and cheese

I insult my enemies in condescending order.

Started reading an archeological thriller. Is it aliens? I hope it's aliens.

If I'm honest, my favourite fame song and montage was actually high fidelity. Bruno getting his synth on in the music shop.

he’s a 10 but his train of thought lacks locomotion

I wonder if I should hide Flashdance lyrics as dialogue in a pastiche on the Matrix.

Coffee's not enough, I need a fight to the death on the roof of a runaway train.

Anti-aging creams should be called “hot sauce” too.

I'm taking my meds, please respond

I have received some tremendously large trousers

Dearest gentle reader.. the revolution will be served at the first ball of the season.

it's just me and my laughable lack of sleep against the world

My Onlyfans would be called GrannieFans and it would just be me sharing anecdotes from my teens in the 80’s.

"One trick is to tell 'em stories that don't go anywhere, like the time I caught the ferry over to Shelbyville. I needed a new heel for my shoe, so, I decided to go to Morganville, which is what they called Shelbyville in those days. So I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time..."

celebrating what is rather than mourning what never was

*maintains eye contact with February while slowly pushing January off the table*

i’d rather be taken out in the wastes of space than take the rubbish out

carbs are like that naughty friend who calls after you’ve gotten your life together

the periodical son has returned

The sky above my garden right now is pretty noish.

Every few days, Hicks gets bored of his regular food. He’s always done this, and just stops eating. So, what we do now is change his breakfast and dinner every few days. Apples, watermelon, cucumber, red pepper, blueberries, carrots, and strawberries are favourites..

now that dry January is over, I can get back to posting while drinking at work

The pizza is out of the oven. Repeat: The pizza is out of the oven. Over. Krrskkpt.

*clears throat, taps mic* Attention all, uhh, most. We made it. January is over.

he’s a 10 but he says dwindleded

if you see a sorcerer in the park then you’re in the right park.

Carefully and painstakingly organizing my shopping cart so all the cold food, all the dry food, and all the non-food items are organized just right so my brain isn't tangled

Happy weekend

I could go on and on and on! I blog about all of my paper mache / sculpture / mask-making projects here.

I could make mirrors. Yeah that’s a job I could see myself doing.

Sleeping Beauty (2026)

All of my work is authentically generated with a squishy brain and a creaky left hand.

The worst thing a species can be is delicious.

live laugh leave it all behind

Morning BlueSky. It’s still January… Ugh.

Me (scrolling): I've seen all of these posts... where is everyone? It's not that late?! Also me: Oh... this is my page.

Life is mostly about getting kind of itchy

was no one going to tell me it's #goblinweek??

Rainy day

Saw this adorable French animation ad and I had to share it over here! The style looks familiar but I can’t my finger on what group it is. Any ideas?

Somewhere there’s an Art English who’s only good at Math and Science.

I want you to stroke my hair while telling me the definition of various words I vaguely understand