Stop posting censored screenshots of social media posts. If you're afraid Big Daddy Algorithm is going to spank you for posting a picture of the word "shit," you need to find a new virtual hangout.

Hibernation season came early this year

gonna start a podcast where i just sigh a lot

What? This life isn't cancelled yet? There's not even a plot anymore. Smh.

It makes me mad when I can’t like your pets’ photo because of your stupid comments above it.

Irrationally distraught that I don’t have a cool raven reminding me to do shit throughout the day.

*going in to donate blood* just take it all

So we agree that what they've really created here is the unhinged poster detector, right?

Everything was already possible, modern times doesn't even need itselves. I asked the muses if it was okay to say it that way and they hired a muse of red underlining

the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world there was a happily ever after

I wish I was that guy on YouTube that digs in the mud in total silence. I don’t want to be in Avatar 3-6

Suddenly empowered to really focus on ruining more things. Game changer.

Most potential pet owners consider things like breeding, size, coat, intelligence, trainability, and temperament. Often overlooked is the crucially important element of aerodynamics, which can greatly affect your gas mileage, raising the overall cost of ownership significantly.

Time to cash in all of my winnings in my spam folder.

Moody with the hint of don't look at me.

Art teacher: I think you've misunderstood. It's the models who will be nude. Me: Well this is awkward.

Looks like the magats would rather go woke than go broke.

going to start jumping into every random convo i see on my tl and make it about horses

Mamdani: "New York will remain a city of immigrants, a city built by immigrants, powered by immigrants, and as of tonight, led by an immigrant." SAY. THAT. SHIT!

America is course correcting.

What the heck is a beaver moon? I thought those were two different things. I’m terrible with female anatomy, tho.

that’s my mayor (i live in texas)

Those Etsy witches sacrificed Dick Cheney today and it fucking worked

BREAKING: All three PA Supreme Court Justices will RETAIN their seats!! www.nbcnews.com/news/amp/rcn...

New Jersey, it is the honor of my life to earn your trust to become this great state’s 57th Governor. I promise to listen, lead with courage, and never forget who I serve.

How do y'all have enough energy to have alt accounts? I can barely keep up with one

charging my beaver under the supermoon as the old Gods intended

😂 I guess they do not like the VP

This account will be equal parts hopeful and gloating for the rest of the evening. To that end: Pour one out for the pile of NYC billionaire money that was utterly incinerated tonight!

Normal People Don’t Want This Shit is running away with the vote tonight

Voters tonight said fuck this fascist shit. With Mamdani, they showed incredible courage to believe in change and a better future. The work doesn’t end here, but everything begins with courage and if we are going to get out of this mess it’s going to take courage to believe in better.

Trump has made his own bed and he can shit his pants in it.

Cuomo has received a late endorsement from RFK's brainworm

I’ll unlike a post before I’ll go back and read a long one that I accidentally liked.

yes I’m talking to myself in public guess what it’s legal move along

ME: wow it gets dark so early now MY UBER PASSENGER: please open your eyes

It was a scene right out of a time standing still, you asking me to pause it, me having already paused it as I'll never want any of our moments to end and actually I hit play again in the eternity it took you to ask, but it's over. We miss fighting in blockbuster

Now seems like a good time to eat the rich.

We are being ruled by absolute losers

We need a snappy term, like the Streisand Effect, for Bluesky's passion for turning dipshits into minor online celebrities.

Terrorists have taken over a building. You get to select one song to blast from speakers on a continuous loop to try to get them to surrender. Copy and quote-post with the name of the song. I choose: "Barbie Girl" by Aqua