Misread these creme eggs (3rd January too early for easter eggs btw) as saying "WHITE EGG - SAME GOD" and was momentarily stopped in my tracks.

Due to my epic procrastination skills I still have this book Radical Technologies by Adam Greenfield. Completely unread on my shelf. Published 2017. Smartphones, algorithms, bitcoin. But the glossary does not even have an entry for the term "AI." That's how new this whole thing is. #popthatbubble

Your power bill has tripled and you can't afford new PC parts just to create this.

Twenty years ago spent great effort in rescuing a loved one from a cult. Social services and the courts were involved. I see how society has become brainwashed by social media. The similarities are stark except there will be no one to rescue us.

The only mountain most people who wear North Face see is when they eat a Toblerone.

Spending Christmas day ill!

six months ago Reader’s Digest asked if they could purchase the publishing rights for this elaborate shitpost I wrote a year ago now wherein I pretended to be the elf equivalent of David Brooks at the North Pole. Thought it was maybe a phishing scam but it’s real LMAOO

One sec...

I am declaring war on 82% of bluesky with this

Four years ago I was recovering from surgery and the shock of losing my dream job, sitting in the Cube Houses in Rotterdam reading @thefence.bsky.social . The COVID-edition hotel breakfast was some very weird processed foods in a paper bag.

remember, the holiday season primer is context dependent! if you have cool lib parents you can treat yellow and maybe even orange as blue. if you've got psycho evangelical parents seek supplemental material that covers Tulsa King and Yellowstone

Let's make it 1,000,001 tonight (@ing my mam n dad)

Why I've begun to carry a dictaphone on a daily basis and why this is not just mad hipster shit but an important tool in reclaiming attention spans from Big Tech. Thanks to @parismarx.com for his "anti big tech christmas guide" which I think is what got me started open.substack.com/pub/fairplay...

FFS, just go ahead and ban ALL the best people, why don't you.

*eyes being prized open* I LOVE THE NATIONAL CYCLE NETWORK I LOVE THE NATIONAL CYCLE NETWORK

Enjoying this MAMMOTH sitcom.

It was only posted to Twitter, so I grabbed it before it (hopefully) gets deleted.

I witnessed a miracle on my way to work this morning

Ian McEwan talked recently about the statistic that the number of people reading for pleasure has dropped by 40% over the last decade. But let's not focus on the negative side and instead try to remember that over the same period the number of people reading for displeasure has almost quadrupled.

Great example of motonormativity

First time getting a cheap bus Cardiff-London and back for a good while, I guess there's nothing anyone can do to stop the vape addicts vaping all the way and sharing that shite with the rest of us on here. This is just buses now. Sucks for the driver most of all.

Everyone is getting upset about the data centers. They pollute a lot and use a lot of energy and will eventually be very ugly/huge vacant buildings. And I understand being mad about that. Until you consider the state of the lazer tag industry at this moment, and how much help that sector needs.

Nights at Osip, lunches at Mountain, ludicrously expensive handbags and cases of delicious wine – we've got some amazing prizes to be won in our festive prizedraw. Enter now, and help us turbocharge our growth for 2026. www.crowdfunder.co.uk/p/fences-fig...

Does it show you how far eBay has strayed from its original mission when it's advertising Black Friday Deals? Shouldn't everything always be cheaper second hand?

JK Rowling got a full *decade* of press as a martyr for being "cancelled" (declared passe by people online) and meanwhile nobody considers it very interesting that a prominent left wing author is basically banned from entering or publishing in the United Kingdom for her politics

The good thing about meditation jokes is you just repeat them until they reveal themselves to you.

A radio programme like the Shipping Forecast but it’s called Bin Day and it just reads out every single council in the country’s bin schedule

I can only imagine how the invention of the e-bike must feel like a little bit of time travelling, for a lot of seniors, who thought that cycling was going to have to exist only as a memory. If only more politicians would support infrastructure to make it safe for them! #HamOnt

Very disappointed Nintendo has not optioned my concepts for the new mario movie.

Bravo! This is my favourite footpath signage

Pointless task of the day, clearing out endless @pocketcasts.com queue... Over 600 hours. If I add about 4 a week, listen to 2 a day... Then 60 wks to reach the bottom. So have to kill ones darlings a bit

not kidding: she deserves a nobel prize in literature for posts

Taking Heads, Fear of Music. 1979

Brilliant new ad campaign I just spotted at the Southwark tube station in London.

This is quite the graph and reinforces my view that Bluesky is actually quite revolutionary.

I’d always wondered why no one had ever published a full, detailed map of the 1960s plan to turn London into a giant web of US-style urban motorways…. It turns even the politicians and designers didn’t make one at the time. It just didn’t exist. Until now.

I'm in bits, kids are crying, "but daddy who's going to do the Is The Escaped Prisoner An Immigrant all-day live feeds now?" and I don't know what to tell them.

So true. Just log off lads.

Surely, "Show me your War Gays" would be a better headline www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

Facebook tells me that I posted this comment 10 years ago and it’s still the best “being caught bunking off school” story I’ve heard. Apologies for any minor factual inaccuracies in my retelling

I went to the opening of this exhibition last week It features a cool Bellingcat display, showing the work we (primarily Ollie Ballinger @yoruk.bsky.social, Bridget Diakun @godin.bsky.social & Youri van der Weide) produced to track Russian ships surreptitiously exporting grain from occupied Crimea

the health problems are bad. but the causes? the causes are very good

Congratulations to @catherinegalway.bsky.social! I know that she will represent Ireland with compassion and integrity. A special thanks to Michael D. Higgins for his inspirational leadership, he represents the very best of Ireland ☘️

Hahahaha @letterboxd.social added the reviews back to the scrolling view hahahaha

Listening to that aleister crowley documentary on radio 4 right now

Dream Diary Excerpt, July 29, 2018: Had this dream where this Chinese student was filming a student film, and I was in a field lolling around with a couple others so he asked us to do a few bleep test style runs up and down the little field and he was filming it.

I'm German and I adore reading Fesshole and AnonOpin. My Fess: Afterwards I always talk to myself and the cat with a, possibly incorrect, British accent. "Havin' a bit of a nap on the comfy chair, are we? Tha's alroight then."

The Doctor is real. Lux (including its encore) proves that the Doctor is not fictional. It's us. We are made up. If you accept this simple truth and pay close attention, you can even tell if today was written by Steven Moffat or Chris Chibnall.