I've just remembered I had a dream last night where I looked in a mirror at my back and it was covered in coarse ginger hair and there was a huge grey bracket fungus growing out of it. What am I becoming?

Misread these creme eggs (3rd January too early for easter eggs btw) as saying "WHITE EGG - SAME GOD" and was momentarily stopped in my tracks.

The joke about masculinity is that it’s always in crisis, I never expected that particular insight from my gender studies minor field to define global politics in my middle age

I read this in my native celcius and recoiled; "THERE IS SOMETHING VERY WRONG WITH YOUR CAT, ITS BOTTOM IS ABOUT TO BOIL"

Have always loved these little barcode guys

oh man an errant bee has invaded the stage of the world darts championship final

This WASN'T me but I do think it every single time I walk past one, which is usually at least twice a day.

TRAITOR ON TRAITOR ACTION AT THE SECOND ROUNDTABLE!!! #TheTraitors

Busily googling "Rumpole of the Old Bailey" #TheTraitors

Because we brits are so passive aggressive & conflict avoidant, saying "I'm speaking" when someone interrupts you is basically like shivving them, and I appreciate that the sound cues on #TheTraitors recognise this.

I was predisposed to be Team Harriet as we have at least two mutual friends, but now that she's taking Hugo down I am ABSOLUTELY Team Harriet. #TheTraitors

"3 males" I am calling it, Rachel is an ACOTAR reader. #TheTraitors

[starmer at home, curtains drawn, riverdancing expressionlessly as the phone rings off the hook]

Misread these creme eggs (3rd January too early for easter eggs btw) as saying "WHITE EGG - SAME GOD" and was momentarily stopped in my tracks.

Keir Starmer's approach to Trump reminds me of Stewart Lee's description of Richard Hammond laughing at Jeremy Clarkson's racist jokes while trying to look disapproving. "A cowardly man trapped between two forms of cowardice".

Seems like the moon was just showing off this afternoon.

So it's appropriate to arrest a world leader if you consider them criminal? You can just go get them? Just asking questions here.

Oh, that IS a super moon.

If anyone in/near London wants to do a read Twelfth Night thing tomorrow, Bankside has a mummer's play for you: thelionspart.co.uk/twelfthnight/

I've just remembered I had a dream last night where I looked in a mirror at my back and it was covered in coarse ginger hair and there was a huge grey bracket fungus growing out of it. What am I becoming?

We don't hear nearly enough about Shakespeare's other sons, Macneth and The Nerchant of Venice.

Do I dare to skeet "impeach"?

"international law must be followed" is european for "thoughts and prayers"

But who will lead HIM through the pearly gates of heaven?

I feel like I haven’t even been properly lied to about the purposes of this war

Nice to see a resurgence in the Wassailing tradition: bbc.com/news/article...

Same reason we aren't stopping companies peddling AI that takes the clothes off unconsenting women and children.... that's rape culture baybeeeee and we're still living in it!

Tonight the Waning Gibbous Moon will appear close to Jupiter with Castor and Pollux. 🔭 🧪

I wish I’d finished my O-Level Geopolitics like all the others on here.

It's a big day for those fluent in the good grammar of civility looking to deploy decorum to mask agendas of cruelty

My new year's resolution is to take up the german practice of luften - opening all your windows and airing out your house for half an hour every morning. I'm really happy to have taken this up in a week when it is heading down into the minus degrees.

In bed with cramps. A hot water bottle and some codeine have been applied to the situation.

Too bad, slopguy

oh yeah? well, could a dying sex criminal do THIS? [bombs venezuela]

[Townes Van Zandt voice] the butter mines are closing and grandpaw's got nothin for his years of toil but popcorn lung and a foreclosure notice on his gingerbread shack

the only thing more frustrating than realizing all the 90s linux guys were right is the knowledge that they realize it too.

An AI chatbot does not have PERSONHOOD. It has no agency. It cannot meaningfully apologise. It cannot speak on behalf of another. It cannot speak for itself; it has no self. Stop asking it for quotes for articles. Stop printing its quotes.

We've been working with @metoffice.gov.uk to analyse 10 years of #NewYearPlantHunt data. The analysis provides the clearest evidence yet of how rising temperatures are impacting the British & Irish flora, with knock-on effects for all our wildlife. www.theguardian.com/environment/...

Oh I discovered the secret to liking life more! Being awake less.

I always forget how dark the "Mull Of Kintyre" video gets.

there are endless headlines about "grok apologizes" or "grok says it will be fixed" after it generated CSAM using pictures of minors and zero headlines about "grok being shut down" or "musk and xAI in big legal trouble" and I think something fundamental has broken here

Can magnetic fridge poetry show contrition. Do dice feel pain. Is this calculator my friend.

"average person takes 1 dementia test per year" factoid actualy just statistical error. average person takes zero dementia tests per year. Alzheimers Georg, who lives in white house & takes over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

If Hugo has one thousand haters I am one. If Hugo has one hater I am her and she is me. #thetraitors

the fact that journalists keep asking chatbots to comment on responses they gave to a different user in a different context window on a different computer is so weird. it's like booting up mario and asking mario why he fell in a pit on your friend's nintendo in 1998

Grok can't apologize. Grok can, when prompted, generate a word sequence that is statistically similar to the colloquial phrases we think of as "apologies," but Grok cannot actually apologize because Grok isn't sentient. But we all have a lot of trouble with this because we assume sentience IS speech

Add “AI is not a person” to all newspaper style guides asap

An AI chatbot does not have PERSONHOOD. It has no agency. It cannot meaningfully apologise. It cannot speak on behalf of another. It cannot speak for itself; it has no self. Stop asking it for quotes for articles. Stop printing its quotes.