Are we sure he wasn't murdered? 'Cos I'm not inflating a bunch of balloons for nothing again.

It's taken a little while but our Ray Harryhausen Top Ten is our first review to reach a million views. www.youtube.com/watch?v=exs-...

Hang on, zoom in... enhance...

Count Binface is actually very serious.

OMG, you guys, I had like no idea murder was bad until I read it here fifteen thousand times. Social media teaches and improves us.

Watched 'Fantastic Four: I'm Ganna Eat Ya Baby' last night. I think. Hard to tell, it left next to no impression. Looked nice, but was weirdly joyless and just dull. Maybe I was in a bad mood, we'll never know. Don't forget to like and subscribe and follow me on Letterboxd.

Z-CARS - "A QUESTION OF STORAGE" Newtown Eye 190264

Well, that just makes me suspect maybe he did it.

"No, you're right, civilians are not valid targets, my bad. Let's try the operation again."

Current mood

Felt bad about a joke, so deleted. Feel even worse now, 'cos it was a good'n. Damn my impossibly high moral standards.

I didn't agree with all of Freddy Krueger's views, but he never tried to kill me, so I'm sorry he's gone.

Been reminded that Bertram Millhauser (screenwriter of several excellent Sherlock Holmes films and much besides) looked like a young Moriarty.

apropos of me clearing out old photos on my phone, here is my favourite ever author photograph (Raymond Chandler)

'A Man For All Seasons' remake looks brilliant.

Vox pops? Vox prats, more like. *waits for HIGNFY to ring*

'Beat The Devil' (1953) was directed by John Huston, but I swear he was channelling Orson Welles. It has that slightly off kilter, deadpan comic, eccentric, edited then re-edited by 3 different people, feel of a 'Mr. Arkadin' or 'Touch Of Evil', only not as disorientating or visually inventive.

I turned down the knighthood, it would sound like a stutter.

The Michael Palins have spoken.

Count Binface / Bin cunt face #YouGottaHaveASystem

Who funds bins?!

My sweat has sweat.

ACHTUALY THE BIN IS HIS HOLE HEAD NOT JUST HIS FACE. WHOT ELSS IS HE LIEYING ABOUT???!!!???!!!

Bloody warm out. Here's a little something I made earlier... #DoctorWho youtube.com/watch?v=QpOv...

... to be humiliating and hilarious.

The Spy Who Loved Me Silly Walk (dir. Lewis Gilbert, 1977).

Amazing, never seen these photos of the Abbot of Amboise before. Now we know!

Did newsnight ever try and unmask Alexander DePfeffel Johnson from his ridiculous "Boris" character?

Another Mitch McConnell sighting

Personally, I think Binface crossing the picket line and standing in Clacton proves he's a wrong'n, but whatever.

Really hate this remake of Secret Army.

"Hilda! Hilda! He says he will let the people of Clacton decide if eating the crew is anybody's business but his own!"

Treating illness with medicine is 'yesterday's model', says my new GP.

Not quite.

Someone's done a Call My Bluff "natsubate", right? Cos I can't be bothered.

This is not my day. Weather's killing me, people are peopling all around me, I don't understand any of the various discourses, and YouTube just recommended a Jonathan Pie video.

We're a failed species.

One of the Whoiest seasons of DW. Some runs just have a magic touch, so that even the stuff that doesn't work can't bring it down. The Pertwee/Manning partnership is at peak charm, the productions are ambitious and the writing is frequently smart, imaginative & witty. A template season.

Where's the BBC's famed translation services when we need them? After = during Finance = fraud Row = National Crime Agency investigation

Losing my mind at this Murder, She Wrote promo

“What you listening to?” “Elgar, Nimrod.” “I only bloody asked!”

Ow. The heat now hurts.

Nobody wants to hear me complain about the heat, which is why I'm writing it down instead. Phew, what a scorcher.

“This will be a people who take massive, massive bribes versus the established rule of law by-election. A chance to stick two fingers up to decency.”

"I like this episode of a TV show." "Well, I don't!" "Me neither!" Sorry, you're right, I should've checked with the nearest couple of cunts if it was OK to publicly like something.