(Walks into a marriage ceremony) I see wed people

I am publishing soon something we were scooped on @theonion.com beat us to it I am not joking

BREAKING: Donald Trump Says Conclave Election Was Rigged, Claims He Received More Votes For Pope Than Anyone Else

classic Loony Tunes have much to teach us about class solidarity

I have a goal for y’all this coming year that I wish I had before my brother died: Take videos of the people you love. Silly ones, serious ones, candid ones, short ones. You’ll be very happy you have these little snippets if you ever have to live without them ❤️

They used to say there was no such thing as gay kids. That it was a choice that could be beaten or tortured out of them through conversion therapy

Give a man a fish and he eats for a day. Teach a man to be a fish and they shut down your hypnotherapy business

"the hawk tuah girl has been milkshake ducked by her memecoin”

Update: Mr. Beast torn apart by ancient cursed mummies

Please tell your kids, every damn day if necessary, that chatGPT is not a goddamn search engine and you shouldn’t believe a word it says. Tell the adults too, but it’s especially imperative to inoculate kids against this

God i love @propublica.org so much

just from a folklore point of view, "attractive hooded man kills billionaire head of hated business with bullets inscribed with political slogans and then vanishes" is narratively breathtaking

oh now you don't like people using other people's stuff huh?

This is lovely and true but it's wild how many posts here are now "wow! I had no idea a social network could help me socialise digitally". We are beaten dogs, barely used to being treated with dignity online

Oh wow you guys I'm starting to think it might be a bad idea to vote for the man most responsible for these numbers

I know who I'm voting for... #ge24

Merry Black Friday to those who celebrate.

team posts

[shakes fist up at our cruel God]

Always 💖 Don't make me tap the sign

Personal message to my dear friends who I love very much

I don’t think it can be emphasized enough that large language models were never intended to do math or know facts; literally all they do is attempt to sound like the text they’re given, which may or may not include math or facts. They don’t do logic or fact checking — they’re just not built for that

Our servers have crashed apnews.com/article/mcdo...

He's not the Lisan al Gaib. He's a very naughty boy!

You can put googly eyes on anything. No one can stop you.

Now, anyone can create an image of Jesus at an NPμ game.

grow a third arm, got it

I...thought this was about something else... 🍉

Petition to honor Michael Shannon every Jan. 6

When I was growing up it was hard to convince older people you couldn't just show up and apply for a job anymore. They just couldn't wrap their heads around it. Now we tell younger people to "just Google it" without appreciating that all the search engines are broken.

christ. I was digging through my archives and found this. FROM 2014.

just got my hands on the Epstein list and I’m shook

Gotta say I’m worried that just like leaded gasoline was ultimately found to be toxic, we’ll eventually learn that drinking unleaded gasoline is also bad for you in some way

"Did you have an Elf on the Shelf growing up too?" "No, my parents loved me."

Anyway take this with you into the holiday season

vaxxed?

Because I think about this too much: prior to the rise of Facebook, and Twitter, the Internet was almost inherently nomadic. Forums and boards and groups had a shelf life. The critical mass of big social media sold people on the idea of a terminal hub. Inimical to good internet practices, imo! 1/2

As evidenced by the events of today, Bluesky isn't a whole new app. It's not even a spin-off. It's a Twitter commentary track

"I'm unvetted Greg, would you deport me?"