Ayatollah Killed In U.S. Airstrike https://theonion.com/ayatollah-killed-in-u-s-airstrike/

You never have to engage with anybody who can be described as “the Strega Nona of bad takes.”

i’m going to turn into one of those guys who kvetches about the lack of tom bombadil in the movie but instead i’m gonna whine about the lack of barrow-wight all the time. i’m going to have an objectively unimportant complaint in the realm of jackson’s sins that is more niche and original than yours

Our country is revealing itself to be a cruel place and lots of us are on edge, but it’s important not to get mad at or be mean to one another over petty online things. Let’s focus our anger on Steve, my mom’s friend’s son who is apparently the perfect child. Fuck that guy.

This War Will Destabilize The Entire Mideast Region And Set Off A Global Shockwave Of Anti-Americanism vs. No It Won’t

Every generation is told this time the threat is uniquely urgent, diplomacy has uniquely failed. And every time, it's civilians who pay the price while the imperialists who launched the strikes call it liberation. It should go without saying that you do not liberate people by bombing their schools.

This is what gaming is all about

Netanyahu Calls Iran Strikes Necessary To Prevent War He Just Started

my researcher told me the anomaly kept killing D-Classes and MTFs so I asked her how many she has and she said she applies for more whenever she loses some so I said it sounds like she's just feeding D-Classes and MTFs to the human-killing anomaly and the other researchers started crying

Love the glimpse into the beautiful mind that notated this used copy of Moby Dick I got

Watch this episode and witness The Longest Cheth.

Love a good internet deep cut modernized for today's game.

Reminds me of this happy creature (from @phantomarine.bsky.social ):

DEMON WALKS!!!! Esther animated by Lindsey @fantasygundam.bsky.social and Leah @frostxstar.bsky.social and Jes @maskii.bsky.social 😈🔥🎉 #unDivine #gamedev

GET OUT was released 9 years ago today. The debut of director Jordan Peele, and acclaimed as one of the best horrors of the 21st century, the tale of how it came to be might make you sink into the floor… 1/46

silly stream doodles

you know how people into femboys will just draw A Girl and then put a male symbol next to them and now that's a boy. can i do that but still give him a pussy. i've been very good. i think i deserve one pussy femboy to shake around in my teeth. as a treat.

Robot waiter had the day off but scored sambal to go

the snoofing

I GOT TO DRAW THE PERCY JACKSON COVERS!!!!! Finally revealed! I can finally talk about this!!!! AHHHHHH

for my next stunt i will be joining the gog agog hivemind #ksbd

BREAKING: The Department of Education has ended its directive that attempted to restrict diversity, equity, and inclusion efforts in schools nationwide. This is a victory for academic freedom and education equity.

ONLY REAL ONES REMEMBER!!!

a neighbor set up this werewolf for halloween and instead of taking it down they just update it with seasonal outfit changes. now it’s dressed for valentine’s day and holding a sign with a picture of bad bunny and his super bowl slogan. i love him.

i mean i always trust the process (except for the first chapter LMAO) but its funny how often a chapter will end and fans will complain about the series possibly going in a bad direction, only for it to not do that and deliver something else that's incredible

me: how come when i look up at the sky it’s blue but then when i’m in outer space it’s all black? the priest giving me communion: you see, the thing about excommunication is that you’re not supposed to come back.

imsorryimsorryimsorry

One of my proudest online moments

Don’t talk to me about “activism”. I’m the biggest activist you’ve ever met. I’m the guy who convinced Jeffrey Epstein to kill himself.

You can read it here if you want to lux-magazine.com/article/tom-...

The article I wrote for LUX about the Tom of Finland Foundation is mentioned in this episode, I'm very honored 🙏

We've been looking forward to sharing this news for a long time. We're making a graphic novel! The Owl House: The Long-Lived King Written by me and the amazing @mikkicrisostomo.bsky.social Illustrated by the incomparable @dindu99.bsky.social We're so excited to tell a brand new story.

Gwen??!!

My Runaway to the Stars book is coming out this year by the way 👀

judgment

always so funny to me when people are like “how am I supposed to explain Gay to my kids?” my kid asks me way harder shit all the time. “why did they build the road this way? why are some people bad?” I don’t know. please ask me about Gay

my dream job is being the moth that flies out of ppl’s wallets when they’re broke

:^)

i don't think christians should be allowed to vibe advertise in commercial breaks like they're selling coca cola. no more shots of the night sky and vague cursive text about finding purpose. show your weird-ass mega pastor asking for money and telling people cholera is caused by loose morals

what conservatives angry about Bad Bunny look like

Saved you a click: curse of the pizza mummy

thanks obama

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Bad Bunny https://theonion.com/the-onions-exclusive-interview-with-bad-bunny/

the stupid twink experience

The Onion’s Exclusive Interview With Pete Hegseth https://theonion.com/the-onions-exclusive-interview-with-pete-hegseth/