Soupcan Steffans
@soupcansteffans.bsky.social
📤 1824
📥 158
📝 11575
Unofficial fan account He/him
pinned post!
People like to shit on reply guys, but like, I was raised on MST3K. It's this or mediocre prop comedy
over 1 year ago
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ceej
about 7 hours ago
LAWYER: The shooter shared your post: “Bugs Bunny is a two-pump chump. I’d show Lola how to smash ‘Animal Style!’” What did you mean by that? ME: That Bugs Bunny cums fast. LAWYER: He lacks sexual prowess? ME: Yes. LAWYER: Did you consider that posting something this inflammatory might be dangerous?
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If you need to get rid of glue you want subhesive
about 2 hours ago
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Who called it a blowjob and not nodding off
about 3 hours ago
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FROVO
about 5 hours ago
ME: how are your circus jobs going TIGHTROPE WALKER: i got suspended HUMAN CANNONBALL: i was fired TRAPEZE ARTIST: they let me go ME: is… is that good or bad
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jesse
about 12 hours ago
An already unacceptably right-leaning press corps is gearing up to go further right because a bad thing almost happened near them; they were in that position to begin with because they decided access to fascism is more important that accurately describing it
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Shiv Ramdas Mens Rice Activist
about 10 hours ago
shoutout to one of the greatest tweets of all time
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How many times do you need to almost be murdered before you think "maybe its me"
about 8 hours ago
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more mr. nice guy
about 14 hours ago
yeah shaken their fists at yet another weak effort
add a skeleton here at some point
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DNR that says "man i didnt even want to be suscitated to begin with"
about 11 hours ago
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🚨 BREAKING: Attempted assassination at the White House Correspondents Dinner. Suspect sprinted at alarming speeds through security before being subdued
about 17 hours ago
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Metamora
about 19 hours ago
This is the most terrified I've ever been in my life and you assholes should be ashamed. We're doing the same event next month btw
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captain bleach
about 23 hours ago
BREAKING: room full of journalists waiting to be told what happened
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🚨 BREAKING: Attempted assassination at the White House Correspondents Dinner. Suspect sprinted at alarming speeds through security before being subdued
about 17 hours ago
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Matt Novak
about 21 hours ago
It’s going to be really funny if the guy’s actual target was like the mentalist made him feel foolish at a show years ago
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Frances Meh
about 22 hours ago
the highest gun ownership rate in the world and nobody can fucking aim
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Jerry Chen
about 21 hours ago
when replies are locked, but quotes are allowed
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Skip, the Online Raccoon
about 21 hours ago
hahahahahah what a chud thing to say
add a skeleton here at some point
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Cat Manning
9 months ago
every new doohickey guy in 2025: all right. I'll do it. AI waifu Jodie Foster with H cups: I love you, onii-san
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Hold on. Let me write a 5 thousand word piece on how the journalist were No Angels There's footage of them making threatening gestures that critics say is AI but who can say. Not my job
add a skeleton here at some point
about 20 hours ago
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worm
about 22 hours ago
add a skeleton here at some point
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toast naturals
about 22 hours ago
Credit where credit is due that's a hell of a lot better way to express your displeasure than a fuckin pocket square
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Nobody takes millenials seriously becaude we don't follow through on our commitments
about 21 hours ago
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Sridhar Ramesh
about 22 hours ago
It is too soon for jokes about Trump's assassination. It hasn't happened yet.
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Matt Novak
1 day ago
Let’s just have a look at the library’s book sale,,,,,,, oh no
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Who would like to bring me drugs
about 24 hours ago
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"Here's the bingo card that will be passed out to attendees at the WHCA dinner to track President Trump's anti-speech rhetoric during his address. " Hey guys thats not really how bingo works. Everyone needs a different card otherwise everyone wins/loses together and it's not really a game
1 day ago
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The preferred method of payment in hyrule is zelle, duh
1 day ago
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Better Things Are Possible
1 day ago
add a skeleton here at some point
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Sometimes you're the Tommy and sometimes you're the drinky
1 day ago
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Basil 🌱
1 day ago
Inflation
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A game where all the architecture is extremely boxy except for one incredibly elaborate sphere with so many polygons it crashes your whole system if you see it and it's called "DO NOT RENDER THE SPHERE"
1 day ago
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Glazed pork roast & fried rice
1 day ago
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Making t shirts out of the last sentence and never explaining when people ask
add a skeleton here at some point
1 day ago
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key
2 days ago
on the drive home from work, i watched a man on a motorcycle making hand motions at the passenger of a RAM truck and get handed a beer on the freeway. what a life.
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gwen pepperoni 🏳️⚧️🤘🏼🍕
1 day ago
Newton should have used gravy instead of an apple to make his point. it's right there in the name. wtf, why didn't he do wordplay like a shit poster?
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Bad dreams? Better sleep it off
1 day ago
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"Have you been eating grass?" "No." "You're sure?" "I would never do that." "What's that green thing on your tongue?" ".......... gangrene."
2 days ago
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muscular baby jeb lund
2 days ago
skyrockets in flight don't email my wife
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sweetie π
1 day ago
“nature abhors a vacuum” would be a great marketing campaign for brooms
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Chris Ingraham
1 day ago
incroyable
add a skeleton here at some point
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Thinking about how my step dad used to say "can't come out, my wife's home!" every time a car would honk outside ha ha And then later they divorced because he cheated on her
1 day ago
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more mr. nice guy
1 day ago
sorry but if you say you hate israel i'm just gonna assume you hate all mass murderers
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Greg the Miller
2 days ago
some of you need to log off so i can post my funny reply before you
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You never hear about small palookas
2 days ago
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Wow with the economy the way it is 100 Grand bars actually are
2 days ago
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"Have you been eating grass?" "No." "You're sure?" "I would never do that." "What's that green thing on your tongue?" ".......... gangrene."
2 days ago
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What's something appropriate to say as a bartender but not when you're artifically inseminating someone? I'll go first, "I'm mixing a Tom Collins"
2 days ago
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We saw some deer and eevee did not give two shits about them
2 days ago
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alexis simpson
2 days ago
getting Bambiboozled (tricked by a deer)
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