alternate timeline where instead of reading to children on 9/11, george bush was in the middle of filming hot ones

it might be hard and a long journey but a better world is possible

It’s World Diabetes Day what did you get me

mental health break? you bet it did

not fox news eating the onion

letting this dipshit attempt to navigate geopolitics is going to be horrific to watch

Bringing polio back to own the libs

heard they made reddit snoo secretary of the treasury. can he even do that

Not evil enough for Twitter, not stupid enough for Threads, and so we find ourselves here at the ass end of the internet together

they’re calling the second trump term the most “reddit” administration in history

AI companies scraping data: Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!! AI companies having their data scraped: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck.

You there boy! What discourse is it?

accidentally bought Water For Babies

welcome to Bluesky, we got

kiki saw a basket and immediately said i am sitting in that thing

me, to someone taking me out to dinner: well damn let me at least fuck you first!

no mom you gotta come pick me up, im being gangstalked on the closed beta app

A monkey once hi-fived me, because game recognizes game.

ME: my underwear is just two soft flour tortillas held together by electrical tape INTERVIEWER [desperate]: ok and how about weaknesses

rise and scry wizards

ELON MUSK: grok tell me who Elon Musk is GROK AI: Wimmy wham wham wozzle! Elon Musk is a pretty far out dude who was one of the first guys to put money behind Tesla before becoming ceo! MUSK: but I invented Tesla GROK AI: no, Tesla was invented- MUSK: grok please commit suicide

Good Cop: It’s not your fault that you did the crime Bad Cop: Go ahead and do it again, who cares

What's up with this frog

Let's fucking go!!!

thank god

Hugh Hewitt: I have heard that the Chinese are giving us all cataleptic vapors to defeat us with their many ghosts. Is that true? Ramaswamy: It is. I will pass a law that makes every American overseas legally a cop. I will bomb Mexico. And I can say that as someone who was once put into a toilet.

20 likes on twitter: I'm an idiot, a loser, a fraud, universally despised 20 likes on bluesky: well well well look who's Queen Bitch of Fuck Mountain

no new posts on the Bored Ape subreddit in the past two days. this eye thing may have taken out the entire community

"ABORTION, POT, AND TRANS RIGHTS MR PRESIDENT"

I haven't actually read the article yet but if the answer isn't "The partially dismembered body of the world's first richest man" my disappointment will echo through this hotel like the howling of a lonesome train wolf.