this is your one Hour warning

I've heard of Canvas Hack...but Stefan Heck? Yep, and he's hosting the stream tonight, while I'm sitting on my rump making everyone crazy! LIVE NOW twitch.tv/gooffkings

my hot cross buns placed third in “Rolls - Other than listed” in the LA county fair’s culinary arts contest. I am very proud of my crossed buns. everything in the cabinet looked so good! well done everyone!

Legitimately his most depressing review of all time

It's the KFC Boneless Bucket Five Two when JF is eating it in his car. twitch.tv/gooffkings

man I really wish Slippy looked less like me

I know Red Wings fans mean well when they say they know what Canucks fans are going through re: the draft lottery but it sort of feels like a guy stubbing his toe and then telling a guy who just severed his leg and is dying in a big pool of blood that they feel his pain

live draft lottery reaction twitch.tv/gooffkings

Well the one positive of all this is that there’s zero argument to be made: the Canucks are the unluckiest and most cursed team in NHL history. So now if I hear somebody else complain about their team I get to be like, “sorry, you don’t get to complain about anything.”

If the Canucks somehow win the draft lottery (they won’t, they never win anything, they’re the unluckiest team in NHL history and I’ve already accepted that they’re picking 3rd), I will buy this card and get it framed on my wall.

If the Canucks hire Pierre fucking Dorion I think I’m fully done with them. A lifetime of fandom out the window. Truly cannot fathom hiring one of the only GMs nearly as stupid and incompetent as Jim Benning but I guess this is the worst run team in all of pro sports for a reason.

Over 100 suggestions so far and I think this was a really bad idea

We're launching the Go Off Kings Store soon, and we need help coming up with a URL! Tip $5 to add a URL to "The Wheel of URLs," and we'll spin it at the end of the night to decide our store URL for the rest of time! Wow! twitch.tv/gooffkings

A Go Off Kings store? That's right - and YOU get to help choose the URL! Wow! Incredible! All that and some other crap, this week on the stream.

The best part of this is that it’s 4 and a half hours long and it’s just clips from 2023 lol

If you were ever looking for 4 and a half hours of lore about a random guy from the internet have I got the video for you youtu.be/XRuqGhL1ctc?...

FUCKED UP JEOPARDY. AFTER 100,000 YEARS. IT RETURNS. FEATURING JESSE FARRAR, NICK WIGER, DAN O'SULLIVAN, AND A MYSTERY THE NASTIEST GAME SHOW ONLINE. SATURDAY, MAY 23RD

Actor Party 6: No Country for Old Podcasters w/ Tom Hill. Stefan and John put their acting hats back on to recreate the infamous gas station scene from "No Country for Old Men", and we do that after Tom puts us through some uncomfortable acting exercises. It's fun! www.patreon.com/posts/156939...

We're going sledding with @demilardner.bsky.social! (pictured here) twitch.tv/gooffkings

We're playing Spelunky 2 with @thelukeman.bsky.social! #KeepGoing #DontLookBack twitch.tv/gooffkings

i think my mouse died. i'm using this piece of shit

its time to write with honors 2. with demi! twitch.tv/gooffkings

We’ve always wanted to watch TV on stream - and now, thanks to our friends at @netflix.com and @gaggltv.bsky.social, we can! Join us now as we watch the first two episodes of Stranger Things: Tales from ‘85 live on stream! twitch.tv/gooffkings #ad

"Look to my coming at first stream on the Monday. At 5 PM Pacific, look to the Go Off Kings."

🖕

👇 blocked me after her pill-popping employee publicly called for me and others to be murdered, continued to employ said pill-popper

Nobody cares 👍

A Saturday stream... and JF is playing a cat version of Dark Souls??? What????? twitch.tv/gooffkings

We are gaming with our friends @rickypeacock.bsky.social and @thelukeman.bsky.social! Wow! twitch.tv/gooffkings

Butt Rogers has a visitor... twitch.tv/worstofkings

Playoff hockey as a neutral fan with no skin in the game is so fucking good. Glad I will get to experience it that way for at least the next decade.

The first edition of the podcast’s phone swapping game was a real hit. @demilardner.bsky.social

I have not seen the Joey Cameo in which he allegedly reveals what the Colossus is but we are about to watch it on stream

BREAKING: We know what the Colossus is and are revealing it on the stream. This is not a joke. Also @libbycwatson.com and @coollike.gay are here to play Spelunky! twitch.tv/gooffkings

looking good sir

We must carry His spirit. It is time

The Marasubathon to End Pot Use starts NOW twitch.tv/bighowelldawdy

No stream Wednesday but bonus stream on Saturday! PLUS: Will Peep return this week? Or will we have to start watching him on Rumble?

Peep This Out getting his YouTube account hacked on my birthday has made me believe in God.

we are playing to frustrate each other twitch.tv/gooffkings

Tonight... we game in hell. twitch.tv/gooffkings

That’s right - we are gaming.

Pull up a hot cup of hot java (especially if you're in Puyallup!). That's right! It's the long-awaited return of the Go Off Kings morning stream! Well, it's not the morning everywhere. But it is in our hearts. And yep - we're writing this post live on the stream right now www.twitch.tv/worstofkings

Now this is cool: on tonight's stream, JF will be sampling the Derpy McFlurry! McDonald's and Netflix, together at last - only on the Go Off Kings! twitch.tv/gooffkings

This week on the stream... Looney Tunes Basketball! The return of the beloved Morning Stream! Super Battle Golf! And more!