Assuming that this racist is being rewarded for attempting to humiliate Ta-Nehisi Coates on air, it's both obvious and really quite adorable that Bari Weiss considers herself a general in the War of Ideas, moving her troops back and forth across a map that's actually just a game board for Candyland

Once again, the ads in the print edition of @theonion.com are worth the price alone

"I'm not in denial, I'm in open rebellion" damn that quote goes hard

The most compelling argument for this is that Sam was once a baby raised without ChatGPT, and look how he turned out.

“We’ve got a fantastic show tonight! The top salesman of something called snake oil is here! Super psyched to hear what that’s all about!”

Limiting myself to just films from pre-existing IP: SW: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER IJ & THE DIAL OF DESTINY THE MANY SAINTS OF NEWARK

You know what works: Small class sizes Teachers with support from admins Engaged, rested, properly fed students not freaking out about EVERYTHING You know what doesn't: The race for the latest technology. Yes, even that one.

JAKE TAPPER: “Nope, he seems very mentally-competent to me.”

Becoming a billionaire gives you the brain of a dog but without a dog's heart.

Portnoy employs a legion of giant babies who make gobs of cash by throwing genuinely unnerving temper tantrums while also claiming they represent How Real Men Behave. This is one Barstool personality's response to the Dodgers signing Edwin Diaz. Normal stuff. Definitely not a (literal) freak show

Again, this whole question-posing approach is fucking terrible. Speak declarative sentences. Make statements.

I see this sort of proud posturing a lot and it's really a wonderful way to loudly demonstrate to everyone you have absolutely no idea what's going on

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to accidentally knock this over and drop my bag on it 17 times until it cracked.”

#ComingUpOnTCM THE NIGHT OF THE HUNTER (1955) Robert Mitchum, Shelley Winters, Lillian Gish Dir.: Charles Laughton 12:45 PM PT A bogus preacher marries an outlaw's widow in search of the man's hidden loot. 1h 33m | Suspense | TV-PG #TCM #TCMParty

Why in the fuck is this made to be the default option? Stop forcing this shit upon people, let them have the option. Tell them “hey, give this new thing a try and see if you like it!”

I only want my songs to transition as god intended: with a listener dedication from Delilah

Lawmakers and bible thumpers don't want you to understand the people they're demonizing are doing more good for society than they ever would

The only people who act like this don't watch sports and have never played a sport in their lives. These are the biggest wet bitches, the whiny fucks who would get their shit wrecked if just one person were to haul off on them

Will Arnett was on Conan and told a story about how Conan dealt with the death of his parents by accusing Jason Bateman of killing them. It’s so funny.

Every CEO: But Donald Trump and the NYT and Fox News and Newsmax told me everyone loved AI

every time i read about one of these college presidents promising to reinvent the liberal arts education i think of "marge v. the monorail"

the way that ai is being advertised now is that everyone has to pretend to be incompetent and incredibly incapable and useless at everything

I can’t emphasize enough how much you need to watch this until the end

I remember when Greene and her buddies (including “a man who would later enter the Capitol during the January 6 insurrection) would get a kick out of harassing Ocasio-Cortez: www.cnn.com/2021/05/14/p...

there's got to be a better way

the only difference between this guy and uncle rico from napoleon dynamite is at least the athletic achievement uncle rico never shut the fuck up about was real

“So how do you think people raised a newborn before ChatGPT?” That’s the question anyone with a functioning brainstem asks.

Everything else aside, the idea that this is a model for many men of *masculinity* is so wild. This? This is "manly"? This is how people think it's cool to act? www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-wG...

Young Republicans are looking for Trump to “be their Franco” but don’t you dare call them fascists.

The fucking “defibrillator” sign directly over his burnt nutsack of a head is frying me.

He's tired of being home with his 19 kids

The way student loans are meant to limit your options in general is truly unhinged. I have fully paid off the amount I took out twice and still owe more than I took out.

Vulture Cinematrix No. 622: Dec 8, 2025 I got 9/9 Correct Score: 2648 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 🟩🟩🟩 Play at: vulture.com/vulturecinem...

Who gives a shit?

Andy Kaufman explaining what soap is to southern wrestling fans

"God-given breast milk," I reckon Bobby is remembering his favorite Hyapatia Lee movies

Santa is a gooner

“And we’re going to demand to see their papers when they enter our airspace, but probably still shoot them down anyways. Reindeer are brown in color and that means they’re a threat to the safety of true Americans.”

It’s very funny to me that countries are trying to pass laws banning teens from social media until they’re older and can “handle it” as if the last decade hasn’t been about watching rich middle aged men nuke their brains on Twitter and then run the USA via shitpost.

You’re not an ACC football team, Pete.

McDonald's serving up low-grade slop? Well, I never

You will be visited by three spirits

30+ movies a year. Wow. That's very impressive. This year Paramount released a grand total of 7, exactly one of which made the year's top 25 (while losing $), so there is zero reason to believe that the company has the means to more than quadruple its output. deadline.com/2025/12/para...

Wow. So we're in a reality where a crony of the president and his son-in-law aligned w/financing from sovereign wealth funds from Saudi Arabia, Qatar, Abu Dhabi for a hostile takeover of the company owning CNN, a major film studio and HBO. Terrible times. https://loom.ly/RE7eJuw

When you’ve been handed everything in your life, you cannot fathom hearing “NO” for an answer.