Art by • Alexey Gorboot

With the help of the Sandy Hook families, The Onion has reached a long-awaited deal to take over InfoWars. We've enlisted the help of @timheidecker.bsky.social, who will be InfoWars' Creative Director. Please stand by for more.

"Facism is the act of self-deception in service of making your own life more painful, solely for the payoff of making life more painful for people you dislike."

Oooooof. That's certainly not what you want to see when you're in a distant third in your senate primary.

How I’ve Been Pronouncing It (Feat. Foghorn Leghorn, my… roommate?)

can this be a solution?

why do I always fall for this exact ship dynamic

It was and still is wild how this guy got to be an open Gater, changed or apologized for none of it, and everyone chose to ignore or make defenses for it with KCD2.

40 years ago... Ridley Scott's LEGEND

eventually he was executed

The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was making sure that every image featuring a woman’s bare foot would be followed forevermore by references to Quentin Tarantino

AGAINST ALL ODDS, THOSE WHO BELIEVED BLUESKY THAT THE CRASH WAS DUE TO A DDOS AND THOSE WHO DIDN'T BELIEVE BLUESKY AND WERE SURE IT WAS BECAUSE OF THE AI VIBE CODING WERE BOTH RIGHT

Ideal relationship dynamic

Who knows who you'll encounter in The Castle Automatic? A pawn of the Court of Swords? A peacockatrice? The Emperor of the Wide World? Mammon, devil of greed? www.exaltedfuneral.com/pages/the-ca...

I was at a dog-friendly bar in NW Portland tonight and a table behind me started singing Happy Birthday and then I realized it wasn’t for a person but a really old dog who was wearing a crown and he was old and fucking adorable and I love this city

Internet slang in now awash with AAVE because whenever white people in this country have heard Black folks talking amongst ourselves they have to copy us bc we are the arbiters of "cool". This predates the internet by almost a century. Even cool was stolen.

You've got the power to be his friend!

Thanks a lot for all the follows, everyone! I'm having soo much fun reading and viewing all the Moon Child love. 😊🙏 I'm also forwarding stuff to the other guys, including Ramon, our music composer. Here are some pencil-on-paper concept sketches I made around the start of Moon Child development. 🙂

would you be his friend

I never want to be a killjoy so I won't get in the way of people dancing in the streets when he drops dead but I think one reason everyone is so thirsty for it is we tacitly understand that to be the only consequence he'll ever face. Which sucks! There should be way more consequences

THIS IS NOT TRUE This is insane please don't buy this The KYM page is just using the regular ass crying emoji, it's Twitter Zoomer brainrot shit. Lance is moral panicking.

#vyper #deadlock fan concept

Vyper deadlock is on the brain. #deadlock #Vyper #valve

Why do the Japanese like their buns askew (2026)

It's been a year since this wonderful video dropped Happy birthday to Kindness Luigi, a true beacon of kindness and an inspiration to all!

You've heard of looksmaxxing but the new thing is heightminning. Getting smaller every day. Becoming a little lad. A cherub-cheeked Fauntleroy with a big lolly, or perhaps a leprechaun.

girls want one thing, and it's to be this weird little dude absolutely lost in the sauce

I can't believe Disney tried burying Halloween Town with the Owl House shm. :/

“So Hexed is Disney’s way of pretending Owl House didn’t happen” The fuck are you talking about?

I was really inspired by the You Cannot Play this TTRPG jam - so I decided to make something for it. Here is a character sheet I have designed for a game about Goblins which you will never, ever, be able to play.

Would've been more wonderful if they still had the actors they fired for asking for union protections

It really frustrates me that we continue to nominate and give awards for queer content to big AAA assholes doing the bare minimum with their eyes rolling and lips curled when there are so many queer indies out there putting their hearts on platters that get ignored because they don't have the budget

Once again: corporate-approved horny. Baldur's Gate and The Witcher and Cyberpunk will not be banned on Twitch, while less lascivious indie games are banned from sale. Horny is an increasingly relevant Cultural Trend, and culture must be consolidated into the hands of capital.

also this is a funny admission because yeah it's totally correct most gacha games would not hold up as playable offline titles because most gacha games are bad! they are bad games that completely cease to have functional loops once the gambling is removed

tl;dr Brave was created by a guy who got kicked out of the for-profit part of Mozilla for being too for-profit and corrupt, so he created a browser that was focused around manipulating advertisements to divert the revenue and then threw several crypto scams on top of it when that failed.

joey...

I'm so fucking tired of this face. For the love of GOD Disney. All your female characters look the fucking same.

I haven't looked at Pragmata even once and asked myself "what do you think the most off-putting fringe freaks you can imagine will make of this?" Please stop asking me to consider this perspective.

it’s really sad and confusing to watch the fandom attempt to make The Pitt into something more complicated than what it is and what it, in fact, needs to be: a simple way for Noah Wyle to deliver to me secret messages containing the instructions for my missions

Goblin doodles while listening to writing stuff.

How everyone feels only finding out about Moon Child 19 years later

This is the single funniest thing I have ever seen Bluesky staff do.

My husband was recently laid off, so I'm looking for extra commission work and refreshing my Ko-fi page with some new selections. You can also leave a small tip if you like my art! Any bit of help is appreciated. ko-fi.com/ksantee/comm...

It, again, truly doesn't matter whether vibecoding actually caused the outages or not - when you start bragging about how claude is making every engineer on staff more productive and the site goes through months of persistent downtime, that's a Statement.

it's that easy

I know it's not the most important thing here but Quentin Tarantino didn't even write the fake Bible verse. He stole it from an old Sonny Chiba movie. And something about that last extra layer of bullshit really adds something to this whole thing, to me