I beat my all-time new year mistakes record this year by somehow finding an ABC streaming version that showed the countdown 30 seconds too late.

🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡🫡

Isekaiing my pet to the vet for his annual checkup

goodbye to 2025. the “year of one thousand cuts”

Looking up the next Pantone Color of the Year like some people would look up the upcoming Chinese Zodiac.

I used to think it's ridiculous that the family from Gremlins just accepts that there's this animal they've never heard of, but now I'm like sure. I have been on the internet for decades and just this year I learned about the pink robin and the pacarana and the tiger quoll. The world has creatures.

oh brother, another bad post from political influencer beltway brian. i am furious at beltway brian all of the time. i share screencaps of beltway brian's posts with people who have no idea who he is. i hate all of beltway brian's posts and i read all of them every single day, including weekends

i think if a director wants to make a movie longer than 120 min they should have to get permission via national referendum

Merry Christmas! Here is a bunny named Xbox I saw at the state fair this year. He is my gift to you

My annual tradition of finding the Muppet Christmas Carol reaction meme

Watching Muppet Christmas Carol and freaking out about each famous muppet appearance like it's the cast of Heat.

i had to drop what i was doing to make this

Beaker giving Scrooge his little red scarf, 😭 x ♾️

No! No!!!

New Penny Arcade arc paints Grogu in a dark new light

We come to this place for Rizzo the Rat as Himself

Learned today that “Galápagos” comes from a Spanish word for tortoise, meaning that “Galápagos Tortoise” is, in fact, a tortology

It's so fucked up to have been a kid during the D&D is the devil freakout and the Tipper Gore dirty lyrics freakout and live to see the teen suicide machine get such a pass.

"there's a new serif in town"

AMONG TIME TRAVELERS IT IS CONSIDERED RUDE TO REFER TO ONE'S TIMELINE BY LETTER OR NUMBER SO INSTEAD THEY REFERENCE THEIR MOST IMPROBABLE EVENTS. THIS IS THE TIMELINE WHERE BOMBADIER BEETLES EVOLVED. THE ONE WHERE ADOLPHE SAX LIVED TO ADULTHOOD.

EVERYONE *DOES* HAVE SECRET KNOWLEDGE BUT USUALLY IT'S SOMETHING SMALL, LIKE I KNOW WHERE THERE IS A SMALL PATCH OF INTERESTING LICHEN GROWING ON MY FENCE

Me making my bed: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck. Me laying in it: Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!!

Again, if this is a legitimate reason to kill someone (it isn’t), then there was nothing the survivors could have done to avoid being killed. And we know that can’t be right, because the USMCJ cites the killing of shipwrecked people **as its prototypical example** of an unlawful order.

No! No!!!

Thorns are modified stems/branches, so these things on roses are NOT thorns. They are officially called prickles, which are epidermal outgrowths. Sorry, Poison, Every Rose Does NOT Have a Thorn. NB: These prickles have another function: they help the shrub climb. #Rosaceae #prickle #Botany 🌾🧪🌱

khyber monday

James Cameron could've spent all that tech on a Redwall series instead and I'm not sure if society would've been better, but it would've been cozier.

"oh, don't forget to highlight, in bright red, the two-letter word in the tagline! the two letter word that's kind of the whole point of this clever ad campaign! the two letter word that links this show to the horror movie of the same name!" "no problem boss. i'm on it"

I just learned the Bugs Bunny No meme doesn't even come from him saying no. It's a frame rotated 90 degrees from him taking a drink from a bottle. I needed to share this.

Gerald has upped the big veg game with his matching red cabbage fit

"Really R2, a 'thirst trap?' I hardly think this is the best use of my skills. Surely simple diplomacy..."

Just for clarification, when you talk about it: Gävle is pronounced "Yeah-vleh", not gav-la, gev-lee or gea-vley.

little gnome-type guy wearing a sleeping cap popped out of the turkey when we went to carve it this year. made a quip about how somebody must have “left the heat on(?)” and went straight to the couch. he’s been sitting there ever since. not sure what protocol is here. where did he go to the bathroom

When I see that the Gavle Goat is under construction

*brusquely at Thanksgiving* NO Aunt Jackie, I said I was working on my GRIMOIRE and SPELLING

I remember when there was a discussion on Twitter about Shein's manufacturing practices and some apologists invented all sorts of fantastical machinery and technology to avoid facing the more horrifying truth. Reminds me of this comedian's joke. IG bscomedian

Me: Obviously Lois Lane would be Miss Piggy in Muppet Superman. Kermit should be Clark Kent but *NOT* Superman. Superman is Henry Cavill and looking like a frog is just him acting meek Fellow Bunker Resident: (glances at screen counting down “Safe Surface Radiation Level 37.6 years”) Ugh

What’s balder that being bald? 🎤

Genuinely took me a moment

Deep in the Sumatran jungle today we found the extraordinary flowers of Rhizanthes pushing their fangs through the forest floor. A sap-sucking, leafless parasite, this is one of the world's weirdest plants.

Up in the middle of the night needing a glass of water but reading about aqueducts on my phone instead

Watched Alien From L.A. (1988)

a “Space Force”, if you will

You been hit by a smooth hymnal

Dragonflies are many things. Flashes of color over the water. Viciously efficient hunters. Members of an ancient and successful lineage that dates back to the carboniferous. But no one can be perfect at everything. Its easy to forget that Dragonflies can't walk! #didyouknow #entemology #bugsky