I’ve heard conspiracy theorists described as needing to believe in some kind of order to the world and I think it’s the same for a lot of these people. if they had to process how bad it is when it doesn’t have to be, they’d snap

Yeah don't follow up on him almost explicitly saying that we don't feel obligated to obey international law and that might is the "iron law of the world"

there should be an online witness protection for when you dime to one of those video essayists about someone in your internet clique where they drop you into another fandom with a whole new name, profile pic, and unhealthy fixation

i do not remember this but lmao

If they ever "perp walk"ed me I'd simply do the funny John Lennon walk from that one pic so they'd look ridiculiys

i own one of those little laser tape measure things and every time i need it i look around for like 45 minutes but like every 2 days when i don't need it i see it and pick it up and go oooh doo hoo that wall is 113 cm away and put it down in the worst possible place

'Being John Malkovich' but you're permanently trapped inside Mr. Beast. You have to hear his voice in that muffled way from inside his head, for as many years as he will live.

the rat is dead. it was pregnant and the rat they're trying to give away is one of its children

hmm.

Nicolás Maduro Charged With Felony Oil Possession

i wonder if im rich enough to get on raya

i will admit i eat like a horse, but not in the way this email subject means. i eat like a horse in that i usually do it with my body in a horizontal orientation

hmm calling me pumpkin roll is a little familiar but i can't say that i hate it

secret forest animal summit

they're doing so little shooting in the liam neeson movies because squibs are too expensive right. that's the only thing i can imagine

i guarantee the cops were like "let's wait til the interview is over so they don't put this on tv"

ah this explains why microsoft teams on my work computer is currently called "Copilot | Copilot | Microsoft Teams"

@moderation.bsky.app is it against the rules to make robots that reply to people unsolicited. i thought it was but i don't even know where to look to figure it out. anyway if so, can you please ban this guy and also the annoying shakespeare bot dipshits

you know how German often has single compound words for complex ideas or feelings. There's one for this too

trying to remember what I do for a living

thinking about listening to a podcast and then making a youtube video where i repeat all the information i heard in the podcast like when arnold palmer invented the arnold palmer (famous tweet reference)

i don't know why so many people block me. i am just a man, online.

It's easy to live as an atheist. Not so easy to die as one. - Spike, Ice Road: Revenge

my dentist’s office is playing nightreign lore videos in the lobby??????

it's funny to me when people who are in sales quit their job and delete it from linkedin because it's like "Director of Sales, Northeast Region" but no company.

i don't know why so many people block me. i am just a man, online.

you know what's kinda funny to imagine is all the hot local grannies from the porno ads who actually do want to be out cruising for dick but we've made a mockery of them

Huh went away for 3 weeks and I got home and no new smells. Good sign

Dropping my bags and running to my vape pen like it's picking me up at the airport

This is the funniest thing that's ever happened on Threads.

It's soooo smart to go stand right up against the baggage claim belt with your legs actually touching it so that when the 20 people who fit have arrived nobody else can see their bags and have to fight through a crowd of people standing there like duhhh to get their bag off the carousel

Kind of worried about when the last time this plane was serviced was

rewatching Knives Out on the plane and even though I liked glass onion i do think this is better. the part where they make jokes about the kid being a nazi are a little more pointed now

going to have to cut bait on liam neesons while i can still finish another movie on this plane

i know that sounds obvious but it's way worse than the first one

im watching the ice road trucker movie sequel starring liam neeson and it might be the laziest writing I've ever seen

i think i, a 38 year old straight man, am going to start calling Sabrina Carpenter "Brina"

Nicolas HUSSEIN Maduro

the best part of traveling is a bunch of adults watching youtube videos on their phones on the external speakers because every person in this country is as smart and self-aware as an ipad kid now

i love how people are still quote tweeting like 2nd level bureaucrats at the state department saying can you believe he tacitly approved of this post he retweeted that implies there should be more white people in the US? folks the entire government is nazis. you don't need to keep doing this

You see, at a certain follower level you stop being a person and become an institution customers can complain to, like a bank

I think most Americans just assume countries that weren't major combatants in WWII just don't have a military

Flying out of the South back to civilization and there's a lot of guys at this airport who look like they watch golf in their 20s

My nephew just turned 3 and it's amazing how much of him I see in the 80 year olds who post on nextdoor and this wensite

Endless Column, by Constantin Brâncuși, 1938, 📸 by @stephenmally

lol these people have zero principles

every once in a while i look to figure it out and i think now musk could give every homeless person in the US a one bedroom apartment for like 35 years

most people wipe their ass with toilet paper and then clean their hands with soap and water just in case they touched their ass. but their ass is still on their body you know. so there's a line somewhere on their body where poop on one side gets wiped off and on the other side gets soap & water