a few months ago, i talked to Tony Kushner for an hour and a half about Munich

Gavin Newsom was in Iowa and chased down a dog that kind of looks like Hitler to suck off the dog, but then the dog bit him and he died (1967-2026). 10 people were at the funeral. They all work in venture capital.

Michael Shannon sings R.E.M. (2026)

Huge respect for Michael Shannon: using his celebrity to honor art that he finds meaningful and putting on one hell of a show. Here’s General Zod singing “Superman”from R.E.M.’s album Life’s Rich Pageant

yes, the wheels of justice are slow. agonizingly, excruciatingly slow. and oftentimes they miss or go off the tracks entirely. in fact most of the time. but occasionally, very infrequently, that big wheel of justice delivers theoretical remuneration for a handful of vested business interests

I want to go back to this: this is a genuinely crazy thing to say when the latest polling indicates a supermajority of the party wants Abolish You have been handed political capital on a silver platter, and you're telling us "no thank you." You're telling us "I know ball" and holding up a cube

Hurriedly retitling my script about the Defenestration of Prague to “Yeeted Rivalry”

If I were a billionaire yes I would occasionally swim in my money, but I would also spend most of my time going on adventures with my grandnephews and my below-average IQ pilot

bring back shame

An ICE agent covered head-to-toe in body cams, just thousands of tiny cameras, beating the shit out of an old woman. That's the bipartisan dream

A mental image I couldn't shake #thecritic

congragulations

Yeah but what if the Melania movie was called Seven Samurai instead? And then when you went to see it they just showed you Akira Kurosawa’s 1954 masterpiece Seven Samurai? I bet you liberals would *love* it then. Typical.

ELON MUSK: your island is so freaking like, based. it's seriously like effing amazeballs. i'm going to basically be making like all of mars totally just like the same as how epic this is STEPHEN HAWKING: jeff rey why, did you in vite, this lame, ass nerd

For Liam.

They really have no fucking idea what is coming. No fucking idea.

New CBS News contributors: Aaron Rodgers, Roseanne Barr, Anton Chigurh, Stephen Miller, Stephen Miller (the other one), Stephen Miller (found a third one), a smokin' hot babe with huge bazongas, Walter White, Tom (not Jerry), big bucket of gravy, Budd Dwyer (deceased), Thomas Chatterton Williams.

The nurses and doctors at Pretti's hospital taking a moment of silence for him.

They straight up murdered this guy for filming them

From this moment forward (and before, but clearly now): -If you work for ICE. -If you vote for money for ICE. You are complicit. This is the gestapo. You're on the wrong side. You can't pretend not to know.

This is quite literally one of the stupidest human beings alive

@gavinnewsom.bsky.social you are a dumb cunt

[sombrely, with tears in eyes] "truly the people of Iran embody the great spirit of Flumpo The Fart Wizard" - author of Flumpo The Fart Wizard

Kicked out of my favorite Vietnamese restaurant again. Fear they may soon bahn mi.

TFW the blonde has fashionable glasses

There's a man in back of this place. He's the one who's doing it. I can see him through the wall. I can see his face. I hope that I never see that face, ever, outside of a dream.

and you may find yourself living in a

My new year's resolution is to befriend the eagle that pecks out my liver every morning

Isengard stands with Mordor.