bold of the editor to not translate Fetterman’s texts from their original Oaf English

“And my other boy, and this is the hardest pill to swallow, doc. My other boy, Grogu… Ivinalititavitch… I no longer love him.”

So you CAN get reparations you just have to be a reactionary white person who tries to overthrow the government because black votes shouldn’t count

Someday...

he thinks you 🫵 are stupid

SHAFT

You’re laughing. Our obese stupid senile pedophile president is trying to barricade himself in his winter palace after sinking the nation into an empire shattering conflict he cannot win and you’re laughing.

Never forget who you’re fighting for.

AP Exclusive: Hamlet Performed at High School, Eight Students Feared Dead

the passive voice store was visited by me and you were known by everybody there

I hate every bot I see. From gpa to gpt

Every picture of ICE agents in airports is just this again

“Someone on LinkedIn viewed your profile” <deletes account>

one promise the cyberpunk future failed to deliver on is me being a courier for 512MB of highly sensitive corporate data contained in my brain zip drive while i wear a nice suit instead of being a courier for burritos in a 2012 hyundai

leland palmer in the black lodge

I wonder what percentage of Americans knows that the CIA helped overthrow a democracy in Iran in 1953, installing a brutal dictator who tortured and murdered people. Republicans keep citing the 1979 Islamic Revolution as if that was the start of U.S.-Iran hostilities. Go back 26 years earlier.

Jan. 6 rioter pardoned by Trump gets life sentence for molesting 2 children

It is so damning of US news media that so many outlets refuse to just straight up say that Senator Tim Sheehy assaulted an activist. He did not "help" Capitol police. They did not need his help. He wanted to assault the guy and did. He should resign.

This is the exact same Guy you could find 2,000 years ago as a Roman senator gleefully listing the number of Germani slain and sold into slavery, 900 years ago exulting in the sack of Jerusalem, or 100 years ago celebrating 500 yards taken on the Western Front. Timeless chickenhawk scum.

Operation Epstein Fury

new gorillaz day mostly an excuse to revisit the greatest tweet ever made

Lmao

Gavin Newsom was in Iowa and chased down a dog that kind of looks like Hitler to suck off the dog, but then the dog bit him and he died (1967-2026). 10 people were at the funeral. They all work in venture capital.

I want to go back to this: this is a genuinely crazy thing to say when the latest polling indicates a supermajority of the party wants Abolish You have been handed political capital on a silver platter, and you're telling us "no thank you." You're telling us "I know ball" and holding up a cube

Hurriedly retitling my script about the Defenestration of Prague to “Yeeted Rivalry”

If I were a billionaire yes I would occasionally swim in my money, but I would also spend most of my time going on adventures with my grandnephews and my below-average IQ pilot

bring back shame

An ICE agent covered head-to-toe in body cams, just thousands of tiny cameras, beating the shit out of an old woman. That's the bipartisan dream

A mental image I couldn't shake #thecritic

congragulations

Yeah but what if the Melania movie was called Seven Samurai instead? And then when you went to see it they just showed you Akira Kurosawa’s 1954 masterpiece Seven Samurai? I bet you liberals would *love* it then. Typical.

ELON MUSK: your island is so freaking like, based. it's seriously like effing amazeballs. i'm going to basically be making like all of mars totally just like the same as how epic this is STEPHEN HAWKING: jeff rey why, did you in vite, this lame, ass nerd

For Liam.

They really have no fucking idea what is coming. No fucking idea.

New CBS News contributors: Aaron Rodgers, Roseanne Barr, Anton Chigurh, Stephen Miller, Stephen Miller (the other one), Stephen Miller (found a third one), a smokin' hot babe with huge bazongas, Walter White, Tom (not Jerry), big bucket of gravy, Budd Dwyer (deceased), Thomas Chatterton Williams.

They straight up murdered this guy for filming them

From this moment forward (and before, but clearly now): -If you work for ICE. -If you vote for money for ICE. You are complicit. This is the gestapo. You're on the wrong side. You can't pretend not to know.

This is quite literally one of the stupidest human beings alive

@gavinnewsom.bsky.social you are a dumb cunt

[sombrely, with tears in eyes] "truly the people of Iran embody the great spirit of Flumpo The Fart Wizard" - author of Flumpo The Fart Wizard