I cannot stress enough how much anyone who complains about the government spending money to give new parents free diapers should never know one single moment of peace

My new favorite entry on setlist.fm

I feel like this perfectly encapsulates whatever is going on with the Rockies.

How much if you want it cold?

Absolutely not see you in court.

googoo dolls iris voice

that said, this is still the best piece of advice

My favorite Christmas song even without the Letterman connection. youtu.be/CocL2Hrbi9k?...

new euphemism for "fact" dropped, today's is "scientific orthodoxy"

logging on every day to see what's going on

A common theme of Trump II is an utterly cowardly class of elites while everyday regular people have risen to the occasion

Rockwell was just begging for an audit

movie you’ve watched more than six times

never forget and not in the corny 9/11 sense. Literally never forget what they're doing to your neighbors in your communities

Tweeted a joke about Dean Cain in 2017. Someone in the comments tagged him, then I got this notification as I was eating a burrito and listening to Doug Loves Movies.

1977: why would the bartender in star wars even care if some robots with artificial intelligence came into his bar 2025: ohhh ok

'Vacations.' The word is 'vacations.'

Instantly thought of like 10 more movies I regretted leaving off but no regrets about these ones being included.

OK, here is your one-minute primer on the whole concept of "trickle down economics," from the obituary of Fred Smith, the founder of Fedex. I mean, if you still can't see it, I have no hope for you.

The satisfaction of putting the USB in right side up on the first try feels like it should be a 1 in 10 chance.

There’s a chance the next pope could be an Italian guy named Pierbattista Pizzaballa, and I think collectively as a people, we need that win right now.

deporting people FOR PAYING THEIR TAXES

Well caring deeply about politics turned out to be a mistake. Time to instead become emotionally invested in a field where I’ll never be let down: sports

Holding up a little sign that says “please stop” as the notorious serial killer, Illiterate Bob, stabs me to death

ADP the rest of draft season

I remember the street I was driving down when @katcorbett.bsky.social played this on KROQ the first time I heard it. All-timer.

In less than one month, we’ve had a season worth of storylines that would’ve been rejected as too dumb for Veep.

This raggedy bitch got a ‘c.’ by his birth year like he was Tutankhamun

Ah damn it turns out this whole political system relies on false assumptions about how big of an asshole someone could be

You: “Hey Jeff, you got any good 90s alt rock late night talk show performances?” Me: “I have many..." David Letterman youtube.com/playlist?lis... Conan O'Brien youtube.com/playlist?lis... Jon Stewart Show youtube.com/playlist?lis...

We should have some unprecedented events that are good for once

good time to remind you of one of my favorite comics. for no particular reason.

[I get home to find a note on the refrigerator that says "I'm leaving and i'm taking the kids"] me: [unplugs fridge from power outlet] you're not going anywhere, you piece of shit

bill nye’s full name is william new years eve

Tired: is Die Hard a Christmas movie? Wired: is L.A. Confidential a Christmas movie?

[post credits Samuel L Jackson] “a complete unknown.” Did you really think you were the only one traveling? I’m here to talk to you about the Wilbury Initiative.

Something tells me his wife is hoping he never retires.

Went to this last year and it was amazing. Seeing John C Reilly and Rain Phoenix cover “All I Have To Do Is Dream” felt like a fever dream.

“Quick burg at the hospital before we take grandpa off life support” is one of those phrases I know is going to stick with me the rest of my life (From r/burgers)

We've all seen the picture of the UnitedHealth shooter. If the cops were serious about catching him they would have staged an M. Night Shyamalan "Trap" situation at an Arctic Monkeys concert by now.

As per usual, great list to discover some music you might’ve missed this year even if Steven has “no love” for some of my favorites.

Feels like nobody is bothering with the Dakotas

You used to call me on my self-own

Artists seen by letter AFI Bon Iver Cure Deftones Explosions in the Sky Future Islands Grizzly Bear Hum Interpol Jungle Killers LCD Soundsystem M83 Nine Inch Nails Outkast Propagandhi QOSTA Rolling Stones Spoon TV on the Radio Used Vampire Weekend Westerman X - ❌ Yeah Yeah Yeahs Z - ❌

cashier: can take your order? me: [spent the entire time in line rehearsing for this moment] yes, one pleaseburger cheese :)

Matt Gaetz’s brother-in-law Palmer Luckey is the founder of Oculus VR and looks exactly like you would imagine.