Hot take: Tacos are sandwiches

if kash patel had a dog, it’d be this guy

the humble forest baguette

It's nearly two weeks til new year! Don't be that sucker editing all your footers at midnight. Set it automatically with the power of ✨AI✨

In the future, millions are forced to become IT truckers after economic headwinds ruin most 401k retirement accounts Sure, the fatality rate is 69%, but when you need medical help, how else do you pay for a few minutes alone with one of those sexy healthcare/MechaHitler robots that replaced humans?

Wake up, babe. 2025 Wikipedia Wrapped just dropped

Done got eaten by a Santa Claus who lives in a shed. 10/10.

actually all of my systems are nervous

(Yes, canonically Oscar the Grouch maintain a green coating of algae and such over bright orange fur and has been doing so for half a century (Orange for the first season in 1969, Green from 1970 onward))

Also, please make the nuclear block actually launch nukes at people that post bad and aren't me (seriously though, I'd love it if we could collapse reply threads)

I bake a mean sourdough. My sourdough: "Fuck you."

🎶It's the moist wonderful time, of the year 💦

If you think that's big, you should see the front

*Werner Herzog voice* Santa Claus is gravid with Holiday Cheer, which he will gladly birth in your living room for a token gift of cookies and milk

can't stop watching this clip of a tesla Optimus teleoperator taking his headset off before properly logging out the robot

No, you can’t tell me that the FIFA peace prize is literally a bunch of grasping hands for the world… that’s TOO on the nose… Also it’s FIFA, shouldn’t touching the ball be a penalty?

this has become a very important video to me

Me too, buddy. Me too 😄

Ah, so it's been officially renamed the "U.S. Institute of Piece (of Shit)"

“Scuttle your gums its time for supper” you make me puke

Fingers crossed

Nuh uh. No more holes. Not after the last one.

On this hallowed thanksgiving eve, I'd like to take this time to remind you that the movie ThanksKilling existed, and may god have mercy on your soul

If a baptized grizzly eats the supreme pontiff, does a catholic bear shit the pope in the woods?

if we could go back in time and talk to someone about our day to day hassles, it would be mental illness. if we could go back in time and journal about our feelings, we'd win the PKD award for paranoia. but we can't go back. we just have to sit through this world like everyone else.

Thinking about hamburbers

cryptography is a mathematical system for transforming problems which aren't key-management problems into key-management problems

icymi, Musk's Ai, Grok, appears to have been instructed to always say Musk is the best at everything. And, when you do that, it turns out there's a loophole!

Net loss

im beginning to think it was a mistake to stake our entire economy on chatbots and fake internet money

If you see this, post your spirit animal.

okay so why is this post still up & account still existing? actual question. the account isn’t even verified like some of the other fed gov accounts either, but also it shouldn’t matter when they post “we will kill you” along with videos of them killing people.

Get in, losers, we’re going to the Cambrian Explosion.

at some point I realized that "let people enjoy things" includes myself

jeffrey epstein won't see your jokes about how poorly written his emails were, but your barely literate friends also won't see them, because they can't read. fire away

DO NOT REPEAT THIS INSIGHT

A firm that sells extraordinarily powerful phone hacking technology that has been demonstrably connected to widespread harms worldwide, including gruesome murder, and was properly sanctioned and held liable because of it ....is now in the hands of these people. That's Bad News, everyone.

Tonight’s dumb napkin cartoon…

Happy There Is A Circulatory System Walking Through The Kitchen Day to all who celebrate.

This is the face of a menace

us @ the moon tonight

42 million people cant buy food this month. It’s time to tax billionaires.

"Baby got back" would be a great name for a song about dachshunds