We off the richest person in Britain and take all their stuff and give it to everyone else and then we work our way down the list of the next richest people doing the same until everyone else can afford food, warmth and housing. If we can't afford poor people, we can't afford rich people.

Now, before everybody starts using phrases like "homicidal maniac" and "needs to be jailed," let's just hear the man out. I think his suggestions have some merit and deserve to be discussed.

MUPPET TRENT REZNOR: what have I become / my swedish friend? SWEDISH CHEF: ervie wurr ye durr gurrs awerre en de ern

<I’m wheeled into the Pitt> Santos: male, 36, at happy hour, now saying “tummy feel crazy” Al-Hashimi: 47% of men’s bodies reject modern IPAs. They’re too hoppy now Robi: the silent killer. Get him to surgery McKay <alone now, staring straight at camera>: I am the same type of communist as you

Yup. Confirmed this is actually happening and not an april fool's joke even if there's a lot of obvious jokes in the statement.

I recommend everyone try this in their best bad Rob Zombie impression.

I think about four eels every single day

moby-dick, his eyes enormous: from hell's heart you STAB at moby? for hate's sake you spit your last BREATH at moby? oh! oh! the great shroud of the sea for ahab! the great shroud of the sea rolling on as it rolled five thousand years ago!!!!

You can say when someone is lying or bigoted

Shout out to all my fellow An Occurrence at Owl Creek Bridge heads, hope you’re having a good day wondering if this is all a brief fantasy before a terrible snap.

have you seen the new supply chain vuln? don't update tubu. it's literally on heebee. they got poodee's deps. they infiltrated dippy. roll back weeno. disable scripts in ~/.gumpyrc. it's in poob. do not install poob. do not update poob. uninstall poob right now. poob has it in for you.

a computer program should look and work the same as long as a fault doesn't need to be addressed by the change. a computer program can be and often is finished

Having cozy source relationships with evil people makes your journalism worse and degrades your personality

I'm not specifically religious but I do see Busta Rhymes as a kind of minor deity

I've been a big fan of John Lithgow, starting when I was 6 and saw him in Santa Claus the Movie - in which he makes a cynical cash-grab product but when he's informed it will probably kill some children he decides to feign ignorance, take the cash and let them die - right up until a few months ago

Every company website now has a CONTACT page with absolutely no way to contact a human presented on it, instead they all just funnel you into a labrynthian rat's nest of AI interactions you must somehow figure out how to trick into connecting you with a real one. It's pure garbage.

“We only have three days to steal fifty cars?” “Don’t worry, we’ll do them all in one night. And then we’ll be gone…in sixty seconds.” “You just said three days and that’s not enough time either. Memphis, what are you talking about?” “Gone…” “Memphis? *Randall*, what are…” “IN SIXTY SECONDS.”

“I’m not gonna die. But if I do die, I’m gonna die…hard.”

You guys wanna see a dead body

me: what up you tube. its your boy Lightgazer as always i am here with my thrall Silváno Silváno: (thick goblin accent) ꜱɪʟᴠᴀɴᴏ. me: and i am going to be looking into some bright ass lights. okay Silváno Silváno: ꜱɪʟᴠᴀɴᴏ. (tapes 6 flashlights together and shines them in my eye) me: thats very bright

what people sound like when they say i asked claude

When Baz Luhrman had the guns say "sword" on the side in Romeo + Juliet, that was the best choice that has been made in any modern adaptation ever.

My favorite part of dune 2 is when the violent militaristic empire with no statecraft decides to make a huge show of martial force resulting in a massive boondoggle that unites their underestimated foe and leads to a crisis related to a resource needed for long range travel ah fuck

There's just gonna be 3 hits: me hitting you, "Breakfast at Tiffany's", and you hitting the ground (me fighting Deep Blue Something)

Not now second sphinx mysteriously discovered buried deep beneath the sands of Egypt, we have enough on our plate www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/...

The LOTR memes will continue until morale improves

John D. FitzGerald’s Great Brain series was so much better than Harry Potter, *and* if you read it as a kid, you were well ahead of the game when you read NIGHTMARE ALLEY as an adult.

I know a ship crewed by the angry dead when I see one

I'm watching End of Days Arnie's character is called JERICHO CANE Kevin Pollak's character is called BOBBY CHICAGO America, what happened, you used to be a real country

Bad news. The King's archers are loosing volley after volley of arrows, yet John Fetterman continues to gather up our village's cows and put them in a giant canvas sack.

"I cant bring myself to stop supporting the show that supports the pedophile president v_v" Batman couldnt get that out of me

Me whenever I see Mifune in a movie

Guys, you’re still trying to replace Big Boat Stuck. told you we can't do it, and we can't do it. Now, what we might be able to do is re-create him. Re-create him in the aggregate.

Yep; no way these things get diagnosed simply because people recognize symptoms and attempt treatment, right?

Suspect Waits Patiently While Cop Sounds Out Miranda Rights

This is completely unbearable. But also like… why are his insane ramblings never summarized like this in the media? We gotta wait for a substack guy to put it together like this?

Meanwhile bike fuel prices have not changed at Costco.

formal proposal of a replacement for the vince mcmahon meme format

Best pitch for an unmade movie I've ever heard is Margot Robbie and Elijah Wood starring as a couple honeymooning in Europe when they get mistaken for a pair of world class assassins played by Samara Weaving and Daniel Radcliffe. Hijinx ensue.

Intern: Patient's 35 years old, checked in because he saw a dog that was "too big" Dr. Robby: Come on we talked about this. You can't come in for that Dr. Al-Ashimi: Actualllly, one in three dogs is too big *she looks at the camera* And it's perfectly normal to be afraid of them.

Not once does this story mention that offering a federal job in exchange for a political favor is a crime

This is non binding unless Congress passes a law though. This is just Trump trying to wish people would treat him as a king

though I am starting to suspect that the Blues Brothers is my Star Wars: a gigantic worldbuilding genre-classic if you ignore some dated elements and at least one incredibly disappointing sequel CAVEAT: Ray Charles has better aim than a Stormtrooper

Some things were made to be drawn by Gary Larson

Every year the senior class took a day trip to Parchman Farm, aka Mississippi State Penitentiary, including a scared straight meet’n’greet with prisoners from death row.

HANK HILL: I would like to order a *sigh* Caniac combo with a *longer sigh* Leprechaun Lemonade.

Sorry for the lack of activity it’s literally just this

Why Do Some People Still Wear Masks In 2026 And On A Completely Unrelated Note Why Is Everyone In The Office Sick Right Now Apart From The Guy In The Mask?