my son had too much stage fright to participate in the first grader dance recital this morning but instead of refusing to get on stage or running off crying or whatever he sat down in the most visible spot, upstage center, and threw his feelings of misery to the back row. I think I have a thespian

Sorcerer (1977) dir. William Friedkin

Tired: I haven't shopped at Target since the boycott began Wired: I haven't Bought anything at Target since the boycott began, but I've taken a shit there like 6 times

Gotta give fish wife tinned fish a big “eh”. Not worth the ten bucks imo.

Sustainable band lineups include four cool people (Ramones), four dorks (Weezer), or two cool people and two dorks (Cheap Trick). Unsustainable band lineups include one cool person and three dorks (Pixies)

came home exhausted, absolutely drained after a long day of work, immediately housed two hot dogs and now I feel like I could go 12 rounds in the ring

Did the three cueing conversation just come up spontaneously at the same time as all of these emails were being made public or was it as an explanation for why these people write and communicate like this

coffee at 2pm won't affect your sleep adversely if you are pure of heart and spirit

I think a good bit would be a forward facing camera TikTok/Instagram reel of a guy describing a tough time he is having regarding a woman but it’s just a prose recitation of Jessie’s Girl

this week ya girl will have been unemployed for ONE YEAR !!!! please consider buying some THINGS to HOLD STUFF

[Ed Harris in Apollo 13 voice] alright. What do we have on this spacecraft that isnt gender.

I am forty one years old please don’t make me look at someone correcting a zoomer with the phrase “princess diana was princess diana for gays” I simple cannot emotionally absorb the circumstances that led to that statement having to be made

Hey cool the train will simply not be running at my stop or any stops I generally need on the weekends for three weekends in a row. I ❤️ NY

Taking a statistical approach to examining the records of the Five Year Mission of the Federation Starship USS Enterprise, in the hopes that it may help future officers who find themselves in similar situations.

I think to use Instagram you have to pass some sort of test and if you fail before you are allowed to make a comment a big warning screen pops up and says “This is a bit. It was written and acted. this is not a video of real life. Do you also write letters to NBC that Weekend Update isn’t accurate?”

posting an intrusive thought here for just long enough that I can be sure it’s in someone else’s brain now and it’s gone from mine. sorry: “someone else”

You: Ugh, this migraine is killing me. I’m going to take excedrin Alien: (50,000 light years away) Our psychic broadcast telling them blueprints for an infinite free energy machine has failed. They used the inhibitor

Only about two weeks until I have to start obsessively tracking all the Instagram stories of all the revival houses in NYC to see who is playing Eyes Wide Shut and Carol this Christmas season

COOGAN: i haven't heard your Peter Griffin but I assume its something along the lines of "Holy Crayup, Lowis" BRYDON: That is where you're so wrong, thats the very thing I don't do. COOGAN: well, do your Peter Griffin. BRYDON: before the cancellation Peter said "howely CWAP, Louis,"

Every time there’s a Politics quote post I don’t agree with

Every regulation written in blood

Interesting

A middle aged Irish woman approached me at a pub and told me I looked like Michael Fassbender, then asked if I even knew who he was. I said of course, he’s a very famous and good looking actor, and she rolls her eyes and goes “oh, he’s not that good looking” and turns heel

on a road trip, in a completely empty rural church in danish jutland we went upstairs to see the organ room which was through a trap door and I was the last one coming back down and absolutely for no reason the trap door just flipped and smashed me right on the head. Antisemitic ghosts imo.

I feel this illustration in my soul. Every goddamn night you gotta decide what's for dinner and it's just such a fucking hassle

@professorlevy.bsky.social took our family photos again this year (hire him!!) and this is the one that I think really captures something

Trying to get ahead of that Joyce Carol Oates dunk

too many temporal qualifiers in this one sorry you’re simply going to have to tell me if this is good or bad

I saw a 35mm print last year or the year before last for the first time since it was originally in theaters and it looked so so much better than the blu ray I have. The grain is fucking beautiful.

this has to be the single greatest image in the history of sports

Who at signal decided that when you post a link to bsky it blows up the pfp as huge as possible?

"babies are born worshipping unknown gods" is one of the most incredible dwarf fortress bugs i have heard of. its poetry.

Here's an absolutely deranged marketing campaign for the 1949 rerelease of The Wizard of Oz

Gay Net … [lowers sunglasses] In Big 16

Just noticed on an old VHS that Robert Patrick was wearing a NIN shirt when he was 3D scanned for the T-1000. That would have been 1990, so he was proudly supporting his brother Richard Patrick, who was in a new band called Nine Inch Nails at the time.

reskeet with a tweet you still think about

this guy started the video with his qualifications as if there was any chance i wouldn’t trust this man about clocks

Academics in Assyria in the 7th c BC complain that admin is preventing them from doing research and teaching

Just caught a guy performatively staring into the middle distance…he wanted me to think he was meditating upon the strange vicissitudes of fate but I could tell he was just a wastoid

“What the fuck is Blinkist” it’s cliffs notes for execs

Highwayman searching for his sword and sword hand in the bushes:

Performative or not I don’t think men should read. our boys tabluas need to be rasa for the revolution. Empty cup male is the new sigma.

Beautiful, meditative, vivid chapter in Anna Karenina where a well-intentioned gentleman landowner/farmer takes up the scythe and mows a field with the peasants he hired to do it Anyway he comes home and his gentry brother is immediately like We’ve Had Some Complaints - no one wants you doing this

i love being a part of the bustling NYC nightlife scene (outside at 5:30pm)

accusing people reading a news paper of “doomturning”

You Must Be THIS 🫳 Menopausal To Consume Gowanus Seafood