An explosion of flavors, but not onions and lettuce

I am unable to follow any UI/UX tutorial in this digital age because whenever someone mentions a “hamburger menu” or a “kebab menu” I start drooling like Homer Simpson

I agree: Sean Dunn is not guilty. This has been a “moments in living out the responsibilities you’ve assumed by selecting your username like seven years ago”

Butternut squash soup with braised hatch chile pulled pork #soupszn 🍲🍽️

good morning specifically to the FBI agent who introduced Mamdani’s dad to Marx

Calling John Tesh to make a Roundball Rock-esque cover of the call to prayer

Not surprised

🎶JUST PUT THAT DICK IN A BOX, PUT THAT DICK IN A BOOOoooox🎶

Chicken Knoepfle Soup 🍲 🍽️ #soupszn

you're wrapping up your meet-and-greet with Pope Leo XIV. as you shake his hand for the photo op, you surprise him with a Birminghamton Rumble Ponies Spicy Meatballs On-Field Cap. His Holiness accepts with grace, but you are struck with a bone-deep revelation he just asked God to send you to Hell

The Supreme Court has overturned Goofus v Gallant

Got a new McDonald’s product at The Shitty McDonald’s That Always Fucks Up Your Order But It’s On The Way To Drop Off My Wife At Work and I didn’t like it, but am still tempted to try it again at a non-Shitty McDonald’s just to see if it was an execution problem, and that’s how they get you

if you want me to extend grace to a schlubby white millennial man with questionable tattoos and a history of incoherent social media posts he better be slugging 40 homers in the bigs every year that's all i have to say

🍔🍲🧅🥓🥨 Cheeseburger soup with onion bacon relish and pretzel croutons #soupszn 🍽️

Would love to know the amenities provided at the rock she’s been living under

and another thing: he’s not mad. please don’t put it in the newspaper that he got mad.

Logging on:

Just saw Tron:Ares. Calling it now: Jared Fogle is gonna win another Oscar

i don't want to wake up and immediately read what you lot have to say! many of you have untreated personality disorders and strange fetishes!

Weeknight meal care of Trader Joe’s (TJ) and Costco (CC): - Autumnal harvest pasta sauce (TJ) - holiday vegetable hash (TJ), roasted w/ amylu chicken basil meatballs (CC) - Rana Italian sausage ravioli (CC) - lacinato kale leaves (TJ) crisped in the oven Got rave reviews! 🍽️

They're spinning this as a marketing fail but I think the real story is just that people are stupid as fucking rocks now fortune.com/2025/10/10/p...

Weird Al could do a parody of Opalite about archaeology and paleontology called Coprolite

Is it the shellfish or the pork sausage that make it Israeli?

OH MY GOD ITS THE CONCUBINE GUY

They should just do one of these bits instead

We could probably save a lot of pain if we somehow convince Donald Trump that Stephen Miller calls him a pissbaby behind his back

Italian Wedding Soup #soupszn

“That’s, like, your opinion, man”

*runs into room out of breath* guys, guys! Listen up, this is important! Does anyone here have moderate to severe plaque psoriasis?

My memories of being a “gifted” elementary school student: - peeing my pants mid-assessment in kindergarten - getting a special math program in 2nd grade because my friend’s mom bullied our teacher into it after we would finish the math test early and goof off

I’m gonna say something controversial: I actually don’t think chickpea anxiety is real

I have been bonding with dozens of fellow victims of the male loneliness epidemic over our shared suffering. They are my dear cherished friends. But if I ever let them know, it will all fall apart.

There was a sour cream dip where everyone seemed like they were just shoveling it in their mouth then a ford truck commercial where they did the movie trailer bwaam as a dude stared in the camera and I thought it was someone suddenly traumatized by the hedonistic dip consumption

dave matthews you know what needs to be done

Madison omelette: diced bratwurst and cheese curds, peppers, onions

BARACK: Michelle, my wife, this article on Yahoo dot com really lines up with my views MICHELLE: you should post it, Obama

I signed up!!

This is an organizing-first campaign. We are located within a movement that stretches back further than the eye can see, and we will use our resources to contribute to the greater Wisconsin organizing project. Today's volunteer is tomorrow's organizer. In WI? Help us: francescahong.com/volunteer

Got another one: They call them “zoomers” because they’re always “zoom”ing around on their e-scooters! The social contract that I grew up in has collapsed and instead of material analysis of why that is I just get angry!

“I’m strong and I want to have like fifty kids and a farm” of course you do. You’re twelve. “I don’t want to eat vegetables I think steak and French fries is the only meal” hell yeah homie you’re twelve. “Maybe if there’s crime we should just send the army” bless your heart my twelve year old buddy

working on a new unified theory of american reality i'm calling "everyone is twelve now"

Free boomer meme for grabs: I typed in “Springsteen” on my music search, and the first song is by Eric Church?! No wonder kids these days are like this!!!! 🤦‍♂️

In the same month that Silksong and Hades II drops, they just did a surprise release of the sequel to “baby shoes”

reposting with alt text because this feels incredibly significant. the right-wing disinfo machine means a lot of the people grieving Charlie Kirk never heard any of the things he said that would have tarnished his brand as Guy Who Just Wants to Have Dialogue Across the Aisle

Love this FanDuel graphic regarding the RedZone commercial breaks. I’m going to use it out of context so much.