Cristiano Ronaldo: what if a mall in Dubai was a person

Hopefully only part one of losers eating shit today

If Spain had a fit Nico Williams, they’d be out of sight. However, if Portugal Literally Anyone other than Cristiano, they’d be cruising it

Every lifelong football fan I've ever met is like "I think players are supposed to serve their suspension" and every adult convert is like "the Archon of Constantinople's epistle on the Pentacostine rites of the eucharist clearly states handballs are mandatory."

If England barely fights off the Norwegians, but then is too exhausted to resist France, you do realize we’re getting a tapestry about it

I can't believe they gave Tilly her own movie after she encouraged the key grip on her last set to commit suicide.

Americans excusing Balogun-gate on the basis the on-field call was wrong, rather than missing the point, are merely enacting a deep cultural conviction that ends always justify means when serving their interests, brought on by sustained propaganda in support of imperial foreign policy. In this essay

Lots of disgusting innovations at this World Cup but you have to say fans with AI placards is right up there.

Spain kicking ass without scoring in a way that always, always ends with Cristiano getting a questionable penalty

Monday Morning, 3 A.M.

If you see guys like this in a 70’s heist movie you know you’re about to watch an all-time classic

Tapping my wrist impatiently to signal that I am fully ready for the James Corden World Cup Postgame Program to start. Let's get to the good stuff!

this is the official scooby doo account

👟New comic: Baby Shoes, Never Worn👟

Norway defeated England in a World Cup qualifier in Oslo on September 9, 1981. Which led to this—the greatest call in sports broadcasting history. Kick rocks, Maggie Thatcher.

From the Telemundo broadcast just now by the commentary team during a slow-mo replay of the goal and a shot of Haaland with his hair down: "This is a perfect goal. The ball didn't touch anything." In exaggerated, gravely, dramatic voice: "TERMINATOR"

Despite being written off by many, Neymar steps up and proves he can still be a pure wank at the highest level

Once again, we see plainly the disgrace of Scotland’s squandered North Sea windfall whereas Norway invested in long-term programmes designed to yield sustainable Haalands

Only Ancelotti could make me have any doubt that bringing on Neymar now would have anything other than hilarious results

This second half has had the pace of Everton and Villa playing a friendly in Singapore during what locals call Summer Death Season

"Got any ideas for that Beech-Nut Gum ad?" "I was thinking a circus clown and strong man sharing a couple sticks backstage." "And they're in love, right?" "Of course they're in love."

Programme aired on 20 December 2025, but the initial legal letter was sent first to ITV, then inexplicably rerouted via Channel 4 before finally being dumped in the Costa outside BBC Broadcasting House.

The NHS was founded 78 years ago today. It was built after the devastation of the Second World War when the country was bankrupt - but when the people demanded a society built on fairness and dignity for all. Today, we must defend the right to healthcare and rebuild our social security system.

AVAILABLE NOW THUNDERCLASH PRESENTS: THE HUNT FOR HYPERDRIVE is our biggest and best book yet! With a 48-page story and 16 pages of bonus content, including art, interviews and even a letters page! Digital copies available RIGHT NOW or you can Pre-order a physical copy to collect at TFN!

action therapist trailer 1-4

"For sale: baby shoes, only worn once but are absolutely massive because the baby was temporarily giant due to irresponsible domestic science (baby has since reverted). Mild wear and tear." - Ernest Hemingway

I have such an expertly curated algorithm that I'm seeing posts from Mexican street food restaurants in the US and this is how they're advertising the game tomorrow night. "Good vibes"

gn

action therapist preview

the kelce bros tearfully disassembling their bunk bed

Wile E. Coyote Finally Kills Road Runner Then Immediately Wishes He Hadn’t

with replay even

The reality of soccer time keeping is that it’s an hour game that takes place in a brisk 90 minutes and the only way to achieve that is for ALL OF YOU NARCS TO KEEP YOUR DAMN MOUTHS SHUT AND QUIT ASKING QUESTIONS.

trump whispering to the Teddy Roosevelt AI to ask if dying is scary

every job i see these days is like: LEAD CONTENT ANALYST, Puppy Killing Factory (remote). $350,000 - $500,000. You will edit our internal newsletter (circulation 500). Associate Editor, Nonprofits, Global Good Magazine (in office, NYC). $27,000 - $28,000. Lead ALL of our fundraising efforts!

Couldn't be prouder of the five we made, but I had at least two seasons more in me. Wanted to hit up the Delta and Gamma quadrants. One more Vindicta holodeck movie. Meet a weirdly nice leftover Weyoun, more stories with the whales and Kayshon, T'Lyn and Ensign Olly. Lots of stuff.

Mt. Fuji climbing season has begun. This means it's time for the other seasonal tradition of TV news crews filming underdressed foreign climbers. www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1TB...

The Kettle, Glasgow Garden Festival, 1988. Pic: Donald W/Flickr

TONY STARK WAS ABLE TO BUILD THIS IN A CAVE, WITH A BUNCH OF SCRAPS

this doesn't even have the full context which makes it funnier

Obviously I've made my peace with soccer theatrics, which I mostly just find funny, RIP Neymar etc, but "the truly maimed are usually quite still" goes so hard as a sentence

Love to see Galvatron getting smacked right in the knackers like that

JB ran over and gave my son and his buddy high fives a few seasons ago before a preseason game. My son’s buddy was so thrilled, he literally puked 5 min later. Might be my favorite basketball moment of the past decade.

witnessing the birth of a new all timer post is such a beautiful thing

We're still thinking about Danny Murphy and Bob the Cat. Commentary camera just dropped. 🫡

WELCOME TO FIELD

Seeing English people on the TL go heavy on cheering for their team against DR Congo

The cherry on the top of this will be when Chelsea drop £70m on Mpasi and get mad at him for not having the game of his life every week