On average, you eat one Borrower a year in your sleep.

Every photo of this man makes him look like that photo of Cilla Black when she stole that guy’s table in a restaurant and refused to move

Not to victim blame but this balloon does feel like it's asking for trouble

Finally getting to say what I had been saving up all campaign: it is good that Anas Sarwar isn't going to be First Minister, I am extremely relieved, and non-partisan niceties can't be expected to be maintained for people actively hostile to the human rights and dignity of my community

saw a truck for a company called Absolute Chimneys and I can’t stop saying that to myself as if I’m an English soccer announcer calling a free kick that sailed over the crossbar

They put one of yours in the hospital, you put out a statement about how disappointed you are. That’s the centrist way.

Every Reform councillor who was elected this week is going to go into their first day of work thinking that 80% of their borough's budget goes on giving immigrants pronouns and they're all going to find that every single department is underfunded and slightly reducing the budget will kill people

a) Ed Miliband b) it would be funny

Joycon Drift lmao

Why does it look like Rachel Reeves is officiating a wedding between Keir Starmer and Gordon Brown

here we go again, the new york times calling an increase of 115k jobs under Trump "solid" while it called similar or considerably bigger gains under Biden "disappointing" or "weak"

Absolutely gutted for the brilliant Mags Hall, who missed out by 0.1%, with IGV taking 0.9%. Meanwhile in Argyll and Bute, *voting staff* mixed up the IGV and SGP *during the count*. Very, very big questions for the Electoral Commission.

googled a joke to see if people had made it before (they had, many times) and look at that, AI does not understand the joke. i almost feel sorry for it

farage held a party conference here and all their fucking wretched, clapped as fuck councillors hang about the cladhan every week frightening asylum seekers and they still lost. FUCK you

“You know what I’m sayin’? … Me, for example. I couldn’t work in some stuffy little office. … The outdoors just calls to me.”

That’s a beautiful majority, well in

If Reform do as well as expected, I'll be reposting this on the hour all day tomorrow.

Best song ever used in a videogame, I'd say youtu.be/Qx1jeYkpXtI?...

Unironically this was perfect comms strategy.

I am at a loss for words.

Perfect Tides: Station to Station is now available for pre-order in the Nintendo eShop at a 15% OFF discount! It's coming at you fast with a 5/14 release. www.nintendo.com/us/store/pro...

A hacker ran me over with a robot lawn mower. But that's NOT the worst part of this. That robot led me straight to the owner's door. Exact GPS coordinates. Email addresses. Wi-Fi passwords. It's all up for grabs. www.theverge.com/tech/925696/...

"Warrior comradeship is stronger than blood!"

Exeggcute

Weezing

As people get ready to vote in the Scottish Parliament election please be careful of the spoiler operation which is 'Independent Green Voice'. They are listed second on the regional ballot paper in South of Scotland with the Green Party further down. IGV is a right-wing spoiler operation.

MAMMAL BULLYING A REPTILE: Nice body temperature dude. Did the sun pick it out for you

Why are we doing this, as a country? What for? Do we think we can just have these things back a few years down the road if we're feeling a little bit more flush?

I’m slightly more of a dog person than a cat person but I deeply respect how dogs have all been bred to serve humanity in a bunch of specific ways and cats have been domesticated for 10,000 years and are still going “look I’m just gonna do cat stuff take it or leave it”

a country which truly embraced christian values would enthusiastically embrace somebody convicted of a crime 30 years ago turning her life around and contributing positively to society

More rattled than I should be by Hacks introducing a character called Nico Hayes

We have to at least consider the possibility that Dawkins knows where his bread is buttered and realizes that a celebrity rationalist who tells the AI industry its products are conscious will be able to buy a bigger house before ChatGPT learns how to set a timer

I should be able to delete a file while a program is using it. The program will just have to figure it out. Who is in charge here?

AZRAEL

There’s a reason everyone brings up that one tweet over and over.

On its third attempt tonight, Marblehead Town Meeting approved an “MBTA Communities–compliant” district largely centered on the 125-year-old Tedesco Country Club, meeting 3A requirements on paper while all but assuring no new housing would be built. This comment says it all.

Andor is the closest thing we have to a historically accurate account of the Rebellion. Movies are Jedi propaganda. Luke never existed; Leia did, but not as she's shown. Han Solo is a composite dirtbag. Chewbacca was a more important leader than them all but sidelined by humanocentric racism.

Here lies Nicol Hay. Cause of death: Heart of Midlothian Football Club

these two sentences, a mere few lines apart, are *chef's kiss*, the absolute pinnacle of fucking around and finding out

Here is a different kind of goal celebration. Tomasz Skublak of Inter Toronto in the CPL, who is also a real estate agent, scores a goal and celebrates by taking out his business card.

So if something happens to that one strait, the whole civilization collapses? That is a great system, well done. Have you thought about colonizing Mars? You'd be good at it.

POV you’re a doordasher

"Instruct him in the matters of loss & pain. Make him suffer. Make him wish he were dead." "Yes?" "And then grant his wish." "But how?" "The cunning warrior attacks neither body nor mind." "TELL ME HOW!!!" "The heart, Osborn. First, we attack his heart!" -🕷️Spider-Man (2002)🎃