May we all dream of such riches.

Spurs did not, in fact, come on.

COYS!

Sumo stars goofing about at tourist locations seems a more fun way to celebrate England than any number of flags.

The BBC are accidentally running the subtitles to Mrs Marple over the Mercury Prize, and it’s rather wonderful. A few of lines could plausibly have been written by Jarvis.

my god there has never been a more accurate use of this

You either die a hero or live long enough to see the bangers of your youth turn up in adverts for toilet cleaner or insurance or whatever

WOLOLO

I visited my ancestral home over the weekend and there was a flag hanging from every single lamppost on the 25 minute walk from the station to my parents’ house. This isn’t even somewhere rural – it’s the south-east of Hertfordshire! It’s in a TfL zone! It felt so alien and depressing.

If Tommy robinson was a journalist he wouldn’t have thousands in cash and a flash car

“What’s the charge? Eating a seal?”

These very true words from Steve Hely have given me tremendous comfort over the years.

Sunday

A *massive* spider has made a web on our kitchen window. It’s genuinely the largest native spider I’ve ever seen. I looked up the species, expecting it to be called something like the Chicken-eating Fire-legged Devil Spider, it’s apparently it’s just a European Garden spider? (No pics, I promise)

the most delightful version of logging on to see what news you've missed

hang in there bud

I’m old enough to remember when talk of renewable energy was always tempered with the caveat that “what’s the point, if China and India keep burning fossil fuels”. While certainly not the whole story, there’s some genuinely good news in here. www.bbc.com/news/article...

If you find yourself in Green Park Station, you can avoid the long walk between Piccadilly and Victoria Lines by taking the escalator up to the ticket hall and back down the other side x

A thread of inspirational quotes from two of my idols: Kemi Badenoch and Ange Postecoglou (uh-oh, I may have gotten some mixed up... or have I??) 🧵

*gasp*

well then stop using his website my good man!!!!!!! you can't hang out on someone's lawn all day every day then complain that he happens to also be on the lawn!

I love environmental storytelling in dystopian sci-fi games.

not sure what language this is, i’ll try to find out as soon as i’ve posted this letter, reaching my fingers through as far as possible to ensure a precise delivery

Making “I want to live in Britain” punishable by the same penalty you get for shoplifting. I mean what the fuck is wrong with these people. Who is voting labour for that???

This only happens to you once

My hot takes on ID cards is that the world has moved on since the last debate. Private companies hold vast amounts of information on people so government-issued ID cards are more palatable. As with any policy, you have to look at it through the lens of “how will Reform abuse this power?” though. 👎

The only Brit Card that folks in the UK will actually carry

the perfect wall clock doesn't ex......

What a time to be alive.

it's extremely funny that Andor takes place in the same universe, imagine Luthen giving his I HAVE MADE MY MIND A SUNLESS SPACE speech and the camera sweeps around to reveal a lil green puppet man

Customer: SOCCER TEAM DMV: ARSENAL Verdict: DENIED

It's been exactly 10 years since one of the funnest days to be online ever

What, and I cannot stress this enough, the absolute shit.

why does this rabbit always look like she's doing a "i've been cancelled" photoshoot for an interview with a UK newspaper

@rexfactor.bsky.social The best/worst thing about puns is that there’s a never-ending supply of them.

Boooo! Don’t make Twilight Imperium actually playable. Let it gather dust on people’s shelves like it’s supposed to. www.rockpapershotgun.com/legendary-st...

🚨 THIS IS NOT A DRILL 🚨 We’ve just seen this, by creator “Menapian” - a 4,998-piece set of the Great Exhibition (1851) Crystal Palace - complete with a bonus Megalosaurus and Ichthyosaur… beta.ideas.lego.com/product-idea...

Our bird feeder ran empty while we were away for the weekend and I came back to it’s camera roll full of disappointed looking birds

Cannot believe the gall of American free speech fans popping up on the LinkedIn page of a UK charity to try and get my colleague fired for a social media post they didn't like. Absolutely get fucked you mad little goblin.

Great that AI has unleashed the incredible journalism productivity hack of making shit up bsky.app/profile/jim....

"How curing cancer going?" "Don't come in!"

Spent a rainy Sunday building Lego’s Viking Village set with my kids. I can forgive the horned helmets but why is there a pumpkin in this set?? 😡

Decent hit.

If you can’t comment on a foreign billionaire calling for your government to be brought down, what is the point of you?

And this has happened *without* a massive sea change of actual popular opinion in favour of these thugs; the elite flip has not been responding to the public, but to social media

Why is this Labour government incapable of saying that they staunchly disagree with everything the far-right stands for? Why are they so unwilling to exercise their own free speech?

Hat tip @clownf1st.bsky.social