virtually every main social ill we face right now is downstream from the fact that rich people have more money than they know what to do with. national security risk

Leave Lindsey Graham out of this.

Two-out walks, man #WorldBaseballClassic

Right. We all know that the side that drops the most ordnance wins. That's why Vietnam was a great American victory.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Roll 'em in a circle of homies and watch me break 'em with the seven

Normalize not wearing baseball hats with suits. More than we already have normalized that, I guess.

You don’t have to type on a keyboard to prompt me to say dumb shit

“Let the word go forth from this time and place that the torch has been passed to a new generation of Americans, and they will never, ever let it go.” -John F. Kennedy (paraphrased)

I wish I were as good at anything as Republicans are at wrecking the American economy

theyre just all so fucking stupid and we were told we had to be respectful and treat their stupid fucking opinions seriously even though we knew its all bull shit and now here we are

In two years all these people clamoring for this war will act like they were always against it, including Donald Trump

Getting ready to travel back to the US after nine days away. Now, for a nice big drink of coffee before checking the headlines…

These thieves keep stealing blueprints from my theft empire!

Why do I have to pretend that I'm going to print something in order to save it as a PDF. Why do I have to engage in a little ruse.

The Supreme Court:

its amazing how chatgpt knows everything about subjects I know nothing about, but is wrong like 40% of the time in things im an expert on. not going to think about this any further

I refuse to learn what a “mog” is/does.

Is Barbra Streisand scheduled for #Colbert this week?

Rand is responsible for so much wrong with the world today. Absolutely wretched person.

This is so spot on

reminder that as insurrectionists and domestic enemies of the United States, all Republicans everywhere are constitutionally banned from holding or seeking public office, so every position they hold they hold illegitimately, and every vote they receive should be deemed invalid

my new job at the EPA is to hunt and destroy every last goddamn bee they’ve ever saved

Opinion | Epstein's friends aren't just pedophiles—they're also job creators. by Bret Stephens

The BLS revisions next month are going to be historic. And barely reported on.

“Who is buying ‘Melania’ tickets?”

Imagine being scared of a guy on TV singing in Spanish. Truly the most unique of snowflakes

This time it’s personal.

“The only thing more powerful than hate is love.” MAGA wanted you to boycott this.

we're getting another lady ghostbusters

Watergate, but if someone was killed.

"Twitter is cooking their brains" theory looking pretty strong

Someone who is good at computer please take the Homer/Bart “so far” meme and put Trump’s head on Homer with Tim Scott’s head on Bart. TIA!

1. It was not an accident. 2. It was not a staffer. 3. While the president may have dementia his racism is not due to dementia. 4. He isn’t sorry. He means every racist thought he shares. 5. His base agrees with him. 6. He will do it again. 7. No one in power will hold him accountable.

The simplest explanation is often the correct explanation. It has never been about EcOnOmIc AnXiEtY or anything else other than gutter racism.

I remain convinced the blockchain is a remarkably elegant solution to a problem that hasn’t yet been discovered (and the root cause of many more problems)

How freaking good is Jessica Williams in #Shrinking? Really freaking good. That’s how good.

If you campaigned for the presidency on a promise to destroy these assholes, you would win a landslide the size of FDR in 1936, when he campaigned on a promise to destroy these assholes.

one thing you can say about jeffrey epstein is that he simply loved emailing

multiple trump-created crises converging with deadly results.

Did you ever stop to think that maybe the Pro Bowl thinks YOU’RE dumb?

Epstein Files confirm Elon Musk to be a world-historic loser

Thank your four attention to this matter!

What is the appropriate amount of time after kicking a vehicle for federal agents to execute a man without trial