SHAKESPEAREAN HAIKU Shall I compare thee To a summer’s day? Alright – Thou art very hot.

It's almost embarrassing how much better I feel when it's 60 degrees and drizzling than I do at 90 in the sun. (15 and 32C, roughly.) If you ever needed proof I'm a PNW girlie...that would probably be it.

Headline: “Where things stand after the deadly Venezuela quakes” Me, grimly: “It was deadly because of the buildings that did NOT remain standing, so maybe you could have phrased that better.”

My neighbor has a band. They were practicing late into the night, so I sent the following text. "Tell your bass player he needs a click track; he's consistently a 32nd note late on the attack." The music stopped entirely shortly thereafter.

Even the pope wants you to finish that screenplay

Pete Hegseth proudly announced that flu vaccines were no longer required for the military. Predictably, a flu outbreak has descended upon the Air Force’s boot camp. Flu vaccines are again required for all new recruits.

Looks like the Earth woke up today and chose violence. Damn.

imagining a grizzled hardboiled detective saying this while gripping some guy's lapels at a shady bar

*you're

apparently the bassist for the Oregon Symphony wore a shark costume for their performance of the Jaws score, you love to see it www.reddit.com/r/Portland/c...

Algae is loving this news cycle. They’ve never been more relevant. Microzooplankton sitting at home changing the channel like, what about us? we even have cilia and pseudopods, this is bullshit.

When reality surpasses fiction! Top: fictional forecast for August 2050, broadcast by French TV in 2014 to warn about the consequences of global warming. Bottom: Real French forecast for yesterday, June 22, 2026.

Egypt and Iran have requested that Pride events in Seattle during their World Cup match be canceled and… no. Welcome to Seattle. This might be the most patriotic I’ve felt in my life. Pride isn’t happening during your game; you’re here during Pride. Suck a rainbow. apnews.com/article/worl...

This needs a skeet of its own. In Boston: ducks (and ducklings) got cones. :) #SCO

seen on i-5 in seattle

one thing i respect about the UK is they’ll choose a prime minister and then almost immediately turn around and be like “actually we fucked up, this guy sucks”

"Something just brushed past my leg!" — Luke Skywalker, #StarWars Image credit: tempestkc on Threads #LincolnMemorialReflectingPool #USA

Check out this sword stuck in a stone!!

Do they have to come back?

I’m not too embarrassed that we are losing to Iran. It’s a big boy country with missiles and drones and so forth ran by stone cold killers. That’s NFL ball for you. I am a little embarrassed we are also losing to algae.

Asking children aged 9 what they think they'll be like when they're 40.

The Veteran in a New Field, by Winslow Homer, 1865 (flipped), 📸 via @shanebacon.bsky.social

Quote from The Guardian that made me chuckle: "A Seattle crowd is singing Take Me Home, Country Roads. I’d wager less than 2% of this crowd have been to West Virginia." (probably true)

Currently dying at the fact that the Washington State Department of Health department issued a warning to all visiting the state that our weed is VERY strong & not to be taken lightly. Be safe out there visiting soccer fans! (credit to @pgcornwell.bsky.social for sharing this hilarious nugget first)

I have to imagine that facing this poster while you pee is a bit intimidating.

Sometimes they have been doing more than one of these things at once!

FWIW, the Aussies who have been meandering around Seattle for the last couple days have been utter delights. Wearing yellow jerseys everywhere, doing shooeys in bars, waving inflatable kangaroos wearing sunglasses at Mariners games. It’s been fun as hell.

“And the building shakes in Seattle!” PNSN’s seismic stations captured the crowd response to both Alex Freeman’s goal and the VAR decision overturning the offside call. It’s #USMNT 2 to Australia 0 at half-time. #WorldCup2026 #FIFAWorldCup #SportsSeismology

ngl, it’s a funny feeling watching a World Cup match at a stadium that’s just down the street from my old office. Definitely home turf.

My editor would, yet again, tell me this is too on the nose.

🤣🤣🤣

Okay, it's time for a Moist Owlette™ timeline cleanse. Today's moist owlette is "Owlfredo" at the Stone Zoo in Stoneham, Massachusetts. She's an Eastern screech owl (Megascops asio) & Animal Ambassador with a big personality. (📷: @zoonewengland.bsky.social via IG)

Here's an easter egg in the new Lego Batman that I think all of you will REALLY appreciate. It's so good, I had to make a video.

If Waffle House doesn’t make this their new slogan, then capitalism has failed

Conversation at the beach: BLACK WOMAN: Now that’s how you cook! A little of this, a little of that, that looks interesting, then add seasonings until the ancestors tell you to stop. WHITE WOMAN: Unfortunately my ancestors were also white.

*thousand-yard stare* I am going to throw all my technology into a volcano, forswear electricity and all the trappings of so-called civilization, and move into a cave by the sea where I will write on pieces of dried kelp

Three years ago and they hit a perfect bullseye

NPR is comparing a trans woman fleeing Texas for her personal safety with a conservative fleeing Seattle because he was annoyed with his neighbors. This is honestly insane both sides framing to a degree that is just blatant lying by omission.

A good obituary, recommended reading for those who did not know the range and importance of Jane’s work as a storyteller. Also, for anyone with small children, I really urge them to find Owl Moon. All by itself it is a legacy. www.nytimes.com/2026/06/14/b...

Never pass up a chance to share this story. There's always someone who hasn't heard it, always someone waiting to experience the joy of reading about it for the first time.

They paved it, the motherfuckers.

In a word: blehhhhhhhhhh.

cooking - add these ingredients over, uhh, medium? uhhhhh, maybe medium high heat? then toss them around until they’re squanchy. then add some herbs or shit, i dunno, here’s dinner BAKING: “IF THE PRECISE TEMPERATURE OF 352.348 DEGREES IS NOT REACHED *EXACTLY* A GREATER HELLRIFT WILL OPEN DIRECTLY

Still my favorite source of local sports updates, just on general principle.

WELCOME TO WASHINGTON, SOCCER FANS. Get acquainted with our state via this highly accurate and mostly-to-scale map.

Dylan, on life in your 80’s, is incredible. @nytimes.com www.nytimes.com/2026/06/14/o...

Applies to virtually every chronic illness, really. (she says as she gets ready to go to the dermatologist…again…about skin issues that no one’s truly figured out over the last decade of trying, and believe me, we’ve tried)

guess who opened her second can of sparkling water tonight and only just now got the hiccups (hic)