BREAKING: trump fires Nobel committee.

This 👇

HIDE THE KETCHUP 🤣

Jaxson Dart is a crazy good quarterback name. It’s like a golfer named Johnny Hole-in-one.

SKATTEBOOOOOOOOOO #nfl

SKATTEBOOOOOOOOOO #nfl

This is NOT the start that I expected from the Giants! #nfl

Shared this with my children. I told them that in no uncertain terms, whatever it is, I will not be upset. But also in no uncertain terms, whatever it is, I will not know what to do.

hi, cis folks in california! this headline leaves out that newsom has another 5 days to sign these bills into law. if you’d like to tell him he should do that to protect trans californians, you should to reach out. he also has a phone: (916) 445-2841 want to know what to say? next post! 🧵

Reminder: Telling a woman she should "smile more" is a non-verbal way of asking her to perform emotional labor for your comfort. Don't be that guy.

“We are home now. We marched from the park to ICE, very peaceful crowd. We were standing around ICE pushed us down, sprayed us with chemical and I was hit in the head with a projectile. This was so unprovoked. People have to know that the Feds are attacking people with NO provocation whatsoever.”

Hey my #Phoenix are #cat people, I need some help. Looking to re-home Maury. I'll be blunt. Maury's awesome, except when he's not. I understand that a particular characteristic of this breed is very loud meowing. He does that. A lot. I'd hoped it would settle down. Happy to answer questions.

... but surely they were all also drag queens, right?

I wish the iOS app store would get its shit together with regard to in-app purchase pricing. What in the absolute fuck does this even mean? How much is a "Pro" 1 year subscription? How much is a 1 month subscription? Why is "Pro", without any time constraints, the cheapest option at $2.99? #apple

I simultaneously chortled and guffawed. Chortawed? Guffled?

What if this holiday season, we spend our money at local/small businesses? Do some research and find alternatives. Money still flows into the economy, but not through the oligarch-owned corporate channels. Even if we only bought 30% of our gifts this way, we'd make a dent and send a message.

"I wasn't served well by the people who ick judges" (spoiler: He picked the judge) Also, he says if you want to see Portland burning to the ground, just turn on the tv or read a newspaper. But even if that _was_ the case, aren't they all fake news? Or is that just when they disagree with him? 🍑🤡

I know antifa isn't a real organization because I don't get 40 texts a week from them asking for donations.

Shows in Wilmington DE and VA Beach.

Y'all, I don't care if you need a house in the Tampa, FL area or not. You _MUST_ check out this Instagram account. www.instagram.com/tampa_bre/

What ever happened to Canada becoming the 51st state? Or us taking over Greenland? I don't think the insanely stupid shit that comes out of his mouth that has no basis in reality gets a fraction of the amount of media coverage is it should. Also, they no longer seem to be eating the cats and dogs.

Really? Not a single “Cheers” fan among us? 🙁

I feel bad that my initial reaction to this is that Albania borders on the Adriatic, its land is mostly mountainous, and its chief export is chrome. #iykyk

Very little effort has been put in to obfuscating the underlying intentions of the ruling party, but the manner in which they are currently mocking their resistance is bald-faced and bold beyond contempt! Please, somebody explain this away or show me how I'm over-reacting.

As seen on the Facebook.

"Leadership: Whatever happens, you're responsible. If it doesn't happen, you're responsible". - trump, Nov 8, 2013 x.com/realDonaldTr...

I approve of this.

Let's go to the videotape... Since the year 2000, there have been four federal government shutdowns. 2013 - Obama (17 days) 2018 - Trump (3 days) 2018 - Trump (several hours) 2019 - Trump (35 days) Anybody see a pattern here? One that might suggest where to actually lay blame?

Don't care. Just want him to do his damned job.

If _THEY_ shut down the government? Who holds the majority in the Senate and the House?

I'm no legal expert but this seems like pretty blatant election interference. Also, somewhat related, RELEASE THE EPSTEIN FILES.

It’s Monday, the gyre is widening, and I am once again asking for your support. My Republican opponents have loaned themselves $50k and $100k respectively, trying to make it look like they have large support. I believe a candidate should be for the people. www.efundraisingconnections.com/c/Kluwe/

"The party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command."

Skattebooooooooo

Nobel Peace Prize stuff right here amirite?

Knock knock. Who's there? Ah. Ah who? Werewolves of London.

OMG ☠️🤣

Gettin’ some weather out here right now in the 85345.

My Big Fat Greek Sausage

Ironroot Republic Harbinger Straight Bourbon Whiskey 160° Back in June of ‘24, I got to be part of a pick team to pick a barrel in honor of a friend that had recently passed. I’ve had this since April, but opted to save it to celebrate the day that I get a job. Today is that day. #whiskey

If the ICE shootings were committed by our side, the ammo would have looked like this..

By this "logic", I look forward to seeing him go after Fox News, Newsman, OANN, and others as major Illegal Campaign Contributors to the RNC.

Not gonna lie… not sure who teared up more during Kimmel’s monologue… Kimmel or me. Really great stuff. #jimmykimmel