participation trophy type shit

At least we know he had a shitty night.

Teaching my football team about the tragedy of the commons, with the lesson being that we should leave the showers running in the locker room at our next away game.

Going back in time 30 years to tell my teen self that Nine Inch Nails would one day make the music for a Disney movie, and that a lot of people would be pissed off about that movie, but for reasons having nothing to do with NIN.

Now I have to know how many more layers he's wearing.

Let's see what my local theater has scheduled on the anniversary of the JFK assassination:

The baby had a higher exit Velo than that single ball that Bryce made contact with this postseason

(As I tolerate the latest abuses by the smoked fish Boyars): "If only the smoked fish czar knew about this."

statler: i heard she wrote “wood” about his penis waldorf: yeah and “cancelled!” about his playoff plans ha ha ha ha

Kind of wild that my local theater is doing a Centennial Retrospective for Lee Grant, who (a) is still alive, and (b) has a bit of mystery surrounding her birth year, to the extent that Wikipedia lists it only as the mid-1920s.

A funny bit in One Battle After Another is how the cops and military guys react when given a fake name in an interrogation. In a movie where you report to a guy named Steve Lockjaw, is it that ridiculous to think there's someone walking around named Fred Flintstone or Peter Parker?

Officially OBAA-pilled. Might be the first time in nearly 40 years of moviegoing I've spontaneously applauded a loathsome guy getting killed. Great cinema can truly change who we are.

You know a lot of people are telling me, Mr. President the ribbon around your neck is the most beautiful I’ve ever seen but we never see you without it. They’re saying we need to know, we deserve to know what you look like without it. It’s true. But I’m not gonna take it off. Maybe I’ll take it off

I can't wait for us all to get this excited for an album release again next month when John Darnielle drops his rock opera about the prophetic visions of a dying ship captain.

Ordinarily I'm opposed to erasing the contributions of problematic or cancelled artists, but if we're being handed a chance to remove Diddy's verses and ad-libs from all of those Biggie tracks, I say we take it.

You know a guy deserves the Nobel peace prize when Norway has to “brace for fallout” if he doesn’t win one

I'm going back to Peach.

That the king is actually unaware of what his bad boyars are doing is one of the funnier world historic turnarounds

Bluesky devs built a website for tedious nerds (Silicon Valley variant, evil) and accidentally acquired an audience of tedious nerds (political variant, mixed)

I can't wait until Robyn's album comes out and we get a diss track but it's just about some nameless (imaginary) woman whose life she ruined at the club. It will become our favorite song and we will take the wrong lessons from it

i looked at the methodology for this and it is a. sex addiction counseling group in texas did a surveymonkey and extrapolated the results to the entire us population which is the sort of research design that earns you an ff on an intro methods class (the extra f is for extra effort), and b. p-hacked

I could never be a major league slugger because I would take a moment to mourn if my beloved bat, whom I love, were to break.

People on this site will post anything. "Charlie Brown had haters." Yes he did. That is canonically true.

Fat Bear Week MJ flu game #WitnessingGreatness

I don't care that they're in different fields, I think the Canadian wrestler who goes by Cat Power should have to change her name like the Charlatans UK or the English Beat had to.

Please report this fucking AI slop. Goddamnit. www.amazon.com/KALEB-HORTON...

Why limit this to sports betting? I should be able to wager on whether the guy picking a fight with Reacher is going to win or not.

One small but immensely annoying thing about these AI nostalgia videos is how they mimic the look of lightly damaged celluloid as a sort of catchall "old" aesthetic.

Always love a real-world instance of the Marshall McLuhan scene in Annie Hall. "That's interesting, because I happen to have Jane Goodall right here, and she thinks the cartoon is hilarious."

Saw this graphic while watching Baseball Tonight and almost laughed out loud at a real-life Tungsten Arm O'Doyle moment.

Burr's own preconceptions about Saudi Arabia here are, like, Reagan-era stereotypes about Libya or Iran. I'm genuinely curious if he could even articulate the argument against performing in Riyadh or if he thinks it has something to do with objections to Saddam Hussein or the PLO.

She let me hit because said please and fell to my knees and started sobbing, begging, and pleading.

generals gathered in their masses/president calls them all fatasses

Showing this poster to the customs agent trying to insist I pay a tariff on a Blu-Ray copy of Sorcerer.

American manufacturing never went away.

A teacher friend of mine once had me volunteer as a judge for a debate competition. I was supposed to be evaluating purely on strength and presentation of their arguments, but I definitely ended up deducting points from those kids who were super obnoxious.

Almost every ICE goon in this video is wearing a hat - one even has a white cowboy hat! - and not one of them has the decency to take it off and throw it to the ground after the cyclist gets away.

As a Philly fan, I don't believe there's anything cuter than happy Mets fans in April! We call that foreshadowing

talk about double trouble: two new york baseball teams are headed to the postseason. or i mean talk about single trouble: a new york baseball team is headed to the postseason

"Well, everyone knows that Republicans love Trump and will always support him. What my plan presupposes is . . . maybe they don't."

Of all the "Unsolved Mysteries" type stuff out there, this seems like the one with the lowest possibility of a government cover-up.

Can we accept that the NFL sucks, its longstanding policy on not paying Super Bowl performers might need to be revisited, but also that the only source in this story is clearly in Taylor's camp and the "they wanted her to do it for exposure" framing seems tailor-made to maximize online outrage?

We need to bring back the Golden Age of Television (HBO shows that get shut down because they killed too many horses)

I would like the child sacrificed to stop, either by we stop doing them, or we acquire an orb with some kind of enchantment, I don't want to be too prescriptive about it, but an orb or other artifact with magical properties that causes them to stop.

I see tons of ads for these advent calendars (mostly for football teams and tv shows) whenever I log into Facebook. I'm sure they're going to bear no resemblance to the AI images and I'm very curious to see how all of the people who got suckered into buying them react when they open them in Dec.

There’s an entire parallel bizarro Bluesky made up entirely of 2017’s top resistance grifters that and possible to be entirely unaware of its existence.