Things are going well for Big Lesbo. Managed to get stuff from Tesco, forgot to tap clubcard AND could still afford on pleb prices!

Sharing, without comment, British newspapers’ depictions of the only Jewish person currently leading a UK political party . Times. Mail. Telegraph. Sun.

In 1979, Mattel sold toy Battlestar Galactica fighter ships that fired a tiny spring-loaded "torpedo." One 4-year old choked on it, and the entire line of torpedo toys was recalled and never sold again.

This is embarrassing

TRUMP: I'm not a rapist. I didn't rape anybody O'DONNELL: Oh, you think he was referring to you?

Report: Every Place On Earth Has Wrong Amount Of Water https://theonion.com/report-every-place-on-earth-has-wrong-amount-of-water-1851544516/

Are they that bad?!

the strait of hormuz needs to have regular, predictable open hours or frankly they are going to lose me as a customer

Some shite comedians are gonna earn more than they ever have!

so wholesome ❤️ (via samfnch on threads)

😬 Started off the show with a wee faux pas! Apologies, to all Ukrainians! 📹 @standcomedyclub #standupcomedy

Hahahaha

Trump April 1st: We could hit it and it would be gone. And there’s not a thing they could do about it. They have no anti-aircraft equipment. Their radar is 100% annihilated. We are unstoppable…

may this define her for the rest of her life. she was willing to stoop this low and still got fired. girl, bye.

I'm very much a pacifist but when this fucking idiot starts slagging off our Navy, then hold me back!

And it was going so well.

No one has ever been "thrown out for laughing" at a comedy show.

Not NOW Houthi Forces

This is truly depraved. Savannah’s and her family’s pain isn’t fun and glib “content.” For the love of God, the irresponsible speculation and just making shit up and acting like details never revealed before suggests a conspiracy is sick and inhuman.

Very strict rules at our accommodation for this weekend. NOTHING about piss though, checkmate booking.com 🤓💡

This is what a vampire looking at a classroom would say.

it’s generally considered polite to conduct your rimming circles in private when all participants are this ugly

It’s cool that the highest level of our government is basically a Make-A-Wish program for middle-aged losers

Trump: “Robert Mueller just died. Good, I’m glad he’s dead. He can no longer hurt innocent people! President DONALD J. TRUMP”

Trump: "Who knows better about surprise than Japan? Why didn't you tell me about Pearl Harbor?"

We should be making so many comedy shows that it doesn’t matter whether you think SNL UK is any good or not, cos there’d be another sketch show you do like. Like we do detective shows.

Reporter: “If you could say something to Trump, what would it be?” PA voter: “You're a worthless pile of shit.” Reporter: “How many times did you vote for him?” PA voter: “Three times. That was my bad. Apparently I'm an idiot.”

I didn't want friends anyway. Everyone is just jealous of me. I like sitting alone at lunch

Wow. Tulsi Gabbard deputy resigns to protest Trump’s Iran War.

A couple and their 5 and 7 year old kids… Shot and killed in front of their 2 other kids by the IDF This would be on every front page and condemned by politicians far and wide if the victims has been Israelis And yet when they’re Palestinians… Utterly utterly shameful.

Not sure if this is cliche or what everybody thinks. But why are 🖨 in 2026 worse than in 1996?

When do we start bombing these butchers? Unfathomable cruelty.

😏 life is for living

Justin Trudeau Finally Comfortable Enough To Keep Brown Face Paint At Katy Perry’s https://theonion.com/justin-trudeau-finally-comfortable-enough-to-keep-brown-face-paint-at-katy-perrys/

I need your help

"Let’s see more amazing comedians writing brand new hours every couple of years [...] especially working-class talent." Ross Leslie (@rosslesliecomedy.bsky.social) of Good Egg Comedy chats about being a Good Egg and supporting new Scottish comics

"Easier than we thought" * Kills 170+ children

Moskowitz: "Let me congratulate the former Homeland Security Secretary on her appointment to be the Shield of Americas, which I'm pretty sure the president came up with when he watched the last Avengers movie"

I'm teaching about early 20th century eugenics today and was reminded that 9 years ago Republican Representative Steve King was stripped of his committee assignments by his GOP colleagues for this post that simply states what is now bog standard GOP policy/rhetoric on immigration and "civilization."

Guy just finished watching The Wire for the fifth time: "are these numbers clean"?

Quit ChatGPT: right now! Your subscription is bankrolling authoritarianism | Rutger Bregman

HANNITY: There are people who say Israel dragged Donald Trump into it. Your reaction? NETANYAHU: *evil laugh*

Oh.

Remember this? Just admit you like bombing shit, and you like distractions, cretin.

RIP to a real one