But… but is there *ANY* way this could be a woman’s fault…?

I would honestly kms if an email was leaked where I said "girls ftw" What a momentous loser.

Legendary comic actor. Very sad news

Fuck, we could all be in with a shot

Someone inflate that jacket?

Fuck these people

I watch this like every 5 years lol Every World Cup year I need my McNulty fix #AUTISTIC

[cough]

Looking good, Mr President!

alt headline: “the immigrant wife of an american president with armed gangs of thugs killing citizens on the streets is screening her vanity project funded by a massive political bribe from one of the wealthiest men in the world”

I just spoke with the White House after another horrific shooting by federal agents this morning. Minnesota has had it. This is sickening. The President must end this operation. Pull the thousands of violent, untrained officers out of Minnesota. Now.

Here's a good cause if you want to support efforts in PWTorch's homebase of Minnesota to support those terrorized by unconstitutionally aggressive tactics by ICE all over our neighborhoods, including terrifying schoolchildren and good families living their lives peacefully. (Aaron's work is great!)

"Yoùr task is to get the left to attack you for having no spine, and the right to attack you for not being a spineless traitor. You are not allowed to physically remove your spine. Good luck, your time starts now."

It has to be physically uncomfortable to be this pathetic.

Mafia goon: Nice house you got here...it'd be a shame if something happened to it Media outlets: Mafia goon rules out use of force. Expresses regret at the mere thought of it

“why are you still on twitter” -> whiny, makes you sound like a scold “oh you post on the pedophile app” -> makes them sound like a pedophile

Hahahahaha

NEWS: The U.S. Department of Justice has formally moved to block the appointment of an independent monitor or special master to oversee the release of Epstein-related records

People performatively mispronouncing Irish names is one of my pet paimhs

I was very annoyed at not winning the big penis prize (due to my penis size being rejected by the judges for some reason) but now the big penis prize winner has given me the big penis prize so now everyone knows I have the big penis.

this whole thing is just a late-era WCW plotline, the face champ turns heel and vacates the belt to the bigger heel

🍆

REPORTER: How does ICE killing Renee Good equate to them doing everything correctly? LEAVITT: Why was Renee Good killed? R: “Are you asking me my opinion? Because an ICE agent acted recklessly and killed her unjustifiably.” L: “Oh, okay. So, you’re a biased reporter with a left wing opinion.”

Funniest timeline now is that Jenrick and Farage can’t work out a deal, and Jenrick ends up having to do the full Powell and join the DUP.

Dumbest electorate in the world voted for this

'Might I suggest private chat in the turret? You have selected MUTUALLY ASSURED TRAITOR DESTRUCTION'

The Globe and Mail

Wes Streeting here looking like he has just been cornered by Hackney Nonce Destroyers in a sting outside Lidl

Oh my god I had no idea how high Bovino's voice is. Honestly explains a lot.

Amazingly, Zahawi only got round to deleting the below after the press conference announcing his defection to Reform.

Anyone still on that site should be fucking embarrassed

He didn't shoot her in the head at point blank range because he felt like he was in danger. He shot her in the head at point blank range because he was furious that she wasn't afraid of him. He shot her in the head at point blank range because he felt emasculated.

Marco Rubio hands Trump a note that was meant to be private and then Trump reads it aloud

JD Vance Claims Renée Good Had No Authority To Be Alive In First Place

The right wants to talk about fraud? Somali fraud? Okay, give me 60 seconds.

The American people electing Trump after he staged a coup attempt 5 years ago was a nail in the coffin of our democracy. You can rationalize it all you want - But inflation! But wokeness! - but ultimately it was a societal suicide attempt and probably the dumbest collective voting decision ever made

A propos of my previous post this guy was the best reviewed stand up at the Frimge last year and his show did not get the hype and attention it deserved. Intelligent and funny it's on for 2 nights next week. sohotheatre.com/events/sam-l...

Trump Claims He Will Marry Maduro’s Wife Until Suitable Replacement Found https://theonion.com/trump-claims-he-will-marry-maduros-wife-until-suitable-replacement-found/

Days after his third dementia screening in six months the president of the United States, who is an open pedophile, abducts a foreign head of state

See what that lunatic Trump did in the Venezuelan capital? Aye, crackers. No, CARACAS. Thank you very much guys.

Get ready for Phase Two: a raid on Oslo to seize the Peace Prize.

RIP Dick Cheney, you would have finally found something to like about the Trump presidency (illegally overthrowing a government for oil)

I wil never take ozempic, because what if the time finally comes to eat the rich and I have no appetite?

Its the time of year when you are just unwrapping indiscriminate shapes in your fridge wrapped in foil with no fucking idea what is going to be within. Love it.

My annual Xmas Eve tradition. Dinnae even need anything but just spent an hour over at Tesco getting in folks way for a laugh.