Went in to find out my wife was laughing way too hard at kid’s bedtime

no healthcare no vacations no energy no video games no jobs no steaks no housing no porn

Asking my partner if they would still love me if I was a screwworm

No matter how tall he actually is, Elon does look like a little guy who sat in the hot tub too long

Incredible answer from KAT about not being nervous before game one but having a calmness that he felt came from his Mom

Happy Pride Month 🌈

did you ever see this thread of tanuki matchbooks? Some absolute units in there

the way the dog turns his head halfway in sent me

many don’t know this, but the traditional 1yr crushiversary gift is a single strawberry

Me checking my notifications every half hour:

Prayers up for the dude I saw outside the Prospect Park subway earlier today decked out in Spurs gear shouting "I got $100 saying the Knicks ain't winning SHIT!"

TIMMY. HYPE. 🗣️ “That was a big win. Three more. Let's go.”

I have a theory that there’s something about being so big that it’s ridiculous that makes you a nicer person, both because people will often need your help and you will often need the help of others

The KAT Wemby center matchup is one of the all time great sports meetings of two delightfully good dudes

🚨"I'm press! What's your name and badge number?" our videojournalist Jon Farina refuses Newark police illegally trying to stop him from broadcasting near Delaney Hall ICE prison on Day 13 of hunger/labor strike. WATCH ⬇️

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another doja tweet has hit endor

"u look like u eat sand" is a great insult.

if it happens, zohran is guaranteed a second term. no one can say no to the mayor who got a knicks championship. it’s like obama coasting to reelection off of the assassination of osama bin laden. sort of.

👍

God: you can either win an Oscar or the Knicks- Chalamet: KNICKS God: I didn't even finish- Chalamet: BING BONG

three more

[taking notes] So the key to stopping Wemby is a large man standing still with his arms up

a fan just ran on the court. no trial necessary. life in prison.

tonight we were blessed by an encounter with remy, the dog who looks like our dog

b-b-b-b-b-b-basketball

🧡 the power of friendship 💙 🏀 go knicks 🏀

Spurs just let Bridges stroll right into that mid range jumper

cómo se dice gay

Only the very best posts require 10 minutes of explanation.

cannot be overstated how stupid this guy is. they have to give him posters that say like “America LOVE Ballroom” with a picture of a big smiley face before every presser or else he falls asleep. he simply cannot comprehend any information that isn’t delivered in comparative pictograms

VOD is live now! Having a lot of fun with Mina, and I think the assist options are an incredible way for players to fine-tune their experience with the game to be as fun as possible for their personal tastes. Good stuff!

JEFF-REY EP-STEIN! clap-clap clap-clap-clap JEFF-REY EP-STEIN! clap-clap clap-clap-clap JEFF-REY EP-STEIN! clap-clap clap-clap-clap

Just bought enough cookies and cake at the local Hungarian pastry shop that the girl at the counter asked if I was going to a party

Probably too obvious, but certainly would be ridiculous.

Morning coffee view

polaroid sounds like a slur for antarcticans

My crankiest old man take is that referring to all art/entertainment/journalism/criticism/comedy/advertising as “content” helped pave the way for broad-ish acceptance of AI slop.

Happy Pride 🌈

it is in absolutely everybody’s best interests to develop some hobbies aside from Phone

This will not end w/ voting rights. The fundamental premises of these SCOTUS opinions are: 1) Anti-discrimination is actually unconstitutional discrimination; 2) Intentional discrimination isn't actionable if any alternative rationale is presented. It's the beginning of the end of civil rights law.

I was reminded of this travesty at Apple Music.

Some villagers cower under their beds, the blood red sky awash with flames. Mother’s clutch their children to their skirts, Father’s make crude weapons with rough hands. The beginning of the end, they realise in futile horror 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔟𝔬𝔶𝔰 𝔞𝔯𝔢 𝔟𝔞𝔠𝔨 𝔦𝔫 𝔱𝔬𝔴𝔫 ₜₕₑ bₒyₛ ₐᵣₑ bₐcₖ ᵢₙ ₜₒwₙ ცơყʂ ąཞɛ ცąƈƙ ıŋ ɬơῳŋ

Full statement of Scott Pelley after he's fired from CBS 60 Minutes, detailing the sort of corruption of journalism Bari Weiss has brought to CBS News:

(Austin Powers game tutorial level) Austin: Wait a tick. When’s the last time I opened my shag bag? Basil: Good thinking, Austin! Why not press ⭕️ and check your inventory? Austin: I do pride myself in pressing the right buttons, don’t I? YEAH, BABY.