We're using this definition of "far right", I presume.

You will *never* guess who is actually the real villain in the Venezuela story. Turns out it’s not Trump, it’s not Maduro, it is in fact you, the hypocritical liberal - my latest for Sp!ked, by Brendan O’Neill.

By the Clicking of My Thumbs

Tuesday

I'm writing a book about an Osteopathic Serial Killer. All his victims report quite minimal lower back pain before dying.

Stats!

This is correct. Baldurs Gate 1 felt out of date and boring when I bought it a year after I’d finished BG2 for the third time.

Can we agree on what country we are going to use for the extraordinary rendition of people who use "cups" as a form of measurement? I hear there are some facilities in Rwanda we could make use of.

Jamie Oliver gets extra for calling for a “lug” of things

Also gulag for having no website button that says "skip to recipe." I don't want to scroll pages of SEO guff about summers on your grandma's farm making The Very Best Apple Crumble Recipe. Dicks.

Add a sprinkle of indefinite detention and stir

Additional time added for "until it looks/feels right". I don't know what it's supposed to look/feel like! That's why I'm using a damn recipe.

Under my benevolent dictatorship, all recipes which don’t use precise measurements - I’m looking at you, “a glug of wine” - will lead to the writer being sent to the gulag for a “bunch of” years.

Read here, etc:

I do like the rhythms of the new year. The snow. Back to work. Manchester United sacking their manager.

A *mild* zombie apocalypse?

Astounding

Possibly the greatest tabloid headline of the modern era

Every world leader when Donald phones them from this point on:

It’s 32 until it’s 33 and that’s a fact

Not the main point of this but it isn’t “as many as 33% believe civil war WOULD happen”, if you follow the link it’s 9% very likely and 23% think it somewhat likely, which is 32% and I would say only the 9% are saying *will*

I was provoked into my observation by visiting Home Bargains FWIW

Things that didn’t exist three months ago and reality is gaslighting me about: Dubai chocolate

Serbia was a mistake. There goes my windscreen

Or organise gladiatorial games in an MMA octagon! Live on Fox Sport Plus.

Be cool if it was like a big safari park, you're driving through and suddenly your car is swarmed by captured presidents and they're bending back your windscreen wipers and eating all the rubber trim.

And eventually there’ll be a pokemon battle between the US and Russia involving all the former dictators each collected

Maybe he’ll start kidnapping all the other Presidents, one by one. Keep them in a big zoo. Like some unholy cross between a Batman villain and someone playing Pokémon.

In May 2024, my wonderful wife Isabella was diagnosed with breast cancer. A whirlwind followed - surgery, 4 months of gruelling chemo, and more. She showed huge strength. She’s now taking on a 100km trek for CoppaFeel. Please sponsor her if you can: www.justgiving.com/page/isabell...

Honestly continues to be bizarre that the Conservative dead-enders theory seems to be step 1) lie step 2) ???? step 3) govern successfully.

It's a fair enough comment though - after all Trump treats everyone except Starmer respectfully, right? Right???

Well he did tell Thatcher beforehand - a couple of hours beforehand, with the Marines about to go in. Thatcher was apoplectic. Oh, and it had been a British colony, which is probably why he felt the need to tell her at all. So, not exactly a wonderful comparison as proof of DECLINE

I mean this is a straight up lie about Grenada isn’t it?

Of course he’s the kind of person who applauds when the plane lands

Spending the last day of the holidays proper (before the dread Sunday of the soul) - eating cheese and pate and crackers and watching Winter’s Bone.

Mixed day. On the one hand, Donald Trump has I would say quite resoundingly destroyed the remnants of the global international order, that were already pretty frayed after Ukraine and the Gaza war, but on the other we did all get to laugh at Ian Leslie so

Honestly I’m not sure Avon and Somerset police have jurisdiction over Venezuela

Final December book haul (Xmas, birthday, charity shops)

Don’t call it being a shitposter, call it embracing

Winter walk

Rational measured reaction from Galloway, here

The thing is, the Venezuelan economy is essentially a corrupt autarky run for the whims of its disgusting authoritarian president so are we sure Trump hasn’t kidnapped him for tips?

Don’t worry everyone, I’m sure President Trump has a thought through plan for what happens to Venezuela after they abduct Maduro and it won’t descend into chaos

I spent most of the last two decades arguing that no, whatever else you want to say about Iraq, it wasn’t really about “oil” in the incredibly crude* way that anti-war protestors claimed. Anyway, this is about oil in the incredibly crude way that anti-war protestors claim. *see what I did there?

Normalise starting your posts “I don’t think Bluesky needs my uniformed takes”.

I mean when you put it like that, it sounds a lot more forgivab… What? Why are you all looking at me

He’s going to start wars until we give him The Nobel Peace Prize for ending one.