I need help reacting to something.

9/11 conspiracy theorist who thinks it happened in a different city

This world is really broken because what do you mean it took me 34 years to learn about the existence of OCTOBASSES

*shakily removing glasses*

Jamelle was cooking. Gift link: www.nytimes.com/2025/11/12/o...

Gotta hand it to em, they had us on this one

"amid cancer journey"

okay, that just about does it

Beloved character actor K Callan, what are you doing?

not really the point of this post but this is how Jeffrey Epstein spelled the basketball player's name

i’d be more comfortable with the olivia nuzzi coverage if every story was headlined something like “seduced by a guy who eats roadkill: the story of an extremely stupid lady”

Sorry, leg cramp, sorry

Be sure to join us for the grand opening of "INSUFFERABLE™—An Influencer Hellscape", presented by Walking and Talking while Staring at the Camera You're Holding in a Slightly Elevated Position and Saying Hello to Individual Followers in the Chat

ME: Right now, Barnes and Noble is doing a gift card promotion—an extra $10 for every $100 purchased. But when you use the gift cards, they function just like any other type of purchase, earning you rewards. And all this is happening during one of Criterion's bi-annual half-price sales. SAMUS ARAN:

Pluribus (2025-)

NYT EDITORIAL DESK "did you do that Nuzzi profile?" "sure did, boss, real fuckin sexy, just like you liked" "you're correct, i did ask for that, now time to search for my name in the epstein emails"

I found another one!

I was holding it together until the disturbingly smooth rotoscoped animation of Fred Flintstone at the end...

When I encounter myself as a different colored cursor because I have the Google Doc open in two tabs

this is my emotional support u-haul truck filled with fertilizer

100 years of Disney films and at no point have I ever seen one that I wish had been made by robots instead of humans

For roughly 30 years, I have used the word “loomster,” a word that originates from a McDonald’s ad printed in Disney Adventures magazine. Looking at the ad for the first time in who knows how long, I now understand why it’s the only word I remember; all these other nonsense words are crap!

ok but that's pretty fitting advertising

the way basic human decency hits these days is crazy

"Sorry Liz, I can't stay late, I'm in a production of Hamnet" "Hamlet? By Shakespeare?" "HamNet by Chloé Zao. She did that superhero movie about how hiroshima was blown up by the gays. Oppenheimer."

they’re saying on the news goku is sick. they’re saying he ate a box of sunmaid raisins and they’re poison for him like for dogs. the camera cut to the weatherman for the forecast and he can’t keep it together. everyone in this town loves goku

In Super Mario Galaxy, the stars on the letters of the logo spell "u r mr gay", while for the movie it says "he mr gay". This is because you are watching Mario, not playing him.

ouroboreos

Jeopardy! knows what Bluesky will want.

Classic NY Times: powerless underage victim is actually the scheming perp; much-older member of the US Congress is actually a passive victim

Thinking about Yakuman DS and one of the most relatable characters in all of video games again

TIRED: trump killed epstein bc he knew too much about the sex crimes WIRED: mnuchin killed epstein bc he knew he had to stay on at treasury in order to keep the world economy on track

thinking about beer 30 again

please tell my wife this is why I have too many records

Do you ever think about how the real Mother Jones would hate you or do you lack self awareness?

You really missed your calling as Subway's head of PR (2015-present)

Michigan J. Frog’s indifferent expressions. That’s it, that’s the skeet.

fucking gasped aloud at this

‘No! Not Larry Summers!’ Wails Devastated Nation

"Smithers, this beer isn't working. I don't feel any younger or funkier." "I'll switch to the tablespoon, Sir."

in retrospect the metoo movement did not go too far and in fact should have been given spanish inquisition levels of power and authority

It would mean a lot to me personally if you would participate in this boycott. A few posts down is a link where you can register to receive updates such as when the consumer boycott is over.

Found a guy.

Like the scene in Airplane! where everyone's lined up to slap the woman, but it's a line outside his cell with Trump, Larry Summers, Deepak Chopra, Steve Bannon, a guy at the New York Times apparently