🎶 My name is Thor And I liked to eat My feelings until they WEREN'T sweet I shagged Jane Foster And saw my dad die Couldn't kill Thanos but I sure did try! 🎶

NEW: Yikesorama. @telliotter.bsky.social reports www.wired.com/story/he-ble...

Turns out I can ask a question if I attend online. Anyone have a good question besides "why are you such a bitch?"

me discovering there are more chips in the bag

It's interesting seeing empty Waymos traveling in packs. Very good use of tech!

On two separate buses, I saw a child slap their dad and some grade school kids slap-fight each other until a woman lectured them. Public transit!

Saw an interview with two of these anti-trans nurses, and they sound as dumb and exclusionary as their case. (It's also striking that morning show hosts asked more questions than American journalists.)

Who's forcing him to continue his *psst... mediocre* show?

Timothée Chalamet is both too old and too young to be whatever his deal is.

HOT TAKE: Any social media post starting with the word "this" is going to be annoying. Example: "This!" "This is the way." "THIS motherfucker..." "This Orange Buffoon..." "THIS female..."

2030: Minority Report's Precogs log their first real-life usage in pre-cancelling potential "Love Island" contestants

Tilly Norwood has died. While filming the Mission: Impossible reboot, Tilly fell off a SpaceX rocket and caught on fire from its explosion.

“I made miniature pastries for networking events full of people who would probably describe themselves as ‘changing the world’ while leaving their dirty dishes on tables directly next to the trash can.”

Oh, you'd HIT THAT? You WOULD? You'd SMASH? Okay, DEAR.

"I hope the problematic political candidate manages to not be problematic if we vote them in!"

"New cities, new titties!" - Bret Michaels (1987), probably

"New cities, new titties!" - Bret Michaels (1987), probably

I can see from some responses that people are still confused about what's going on. A lot of us liberals are very literal! So we assume Trump is "confused" about this. He's not. "Trans" is an all-purpose category on the right now to describe anyone who doesn't conform to rigid MAGA gender roles.

Timothée Chalamet is both too old and too young to be whatever his deal is.

Sharpies stay on strong

There can be only one Song of the Summer, and it is crowned at the end of summer. Any and all attempts to pre-ordain a Song–let alone Songs–shall be deemed laughable. That's the rule.

God these people suck. “We’re currently drawing up plans to say, listen, these sanctuary cities where the local radical-left Democrats aren’t allowing us to do our jobs and enforce federal laws, then we shouldn’t be processing international flights into their cities either,” Mullin said.

The aliens from "Independence Day" have the opportunity to do the funniest thing.

Pondering

It's amazing that Trump appears alive despite his brain shutting down in 1992.

I hope the TRUMP letters from the building fall on him.

Watched a direct-to-video movie (with Bruce Willis being as active as he could) where the bad guys (all black) were partying in a seedy apartment in a montage–complete with twerking women and butts being slapped. It was their final moments of fun before the hero cops busted in and shot everyone.

DAVID ELLISON: You get that picture of Captain Kirk in Wrath of Khan I wanted? CHATGPT: gdehohihdvjkkddaarh'h'^°€•{{=}\\=™✓¥€}=™}®©|®........ ELLISON: Exactly.

Coffin Flop!

*Dave Chappelle deletes "Black Pope" script from Chappelle Show reboot*

🎶 Everybody blast now 🎶

I disagree with all but kids wanting to feel the adult behind the book. There are laws against that.

NO CASUALTIES. (But one casualty is okay.)

Hoping all those Manosphere dorks off themselves at the same time like the end of "Fateful Findings"

Awful Man Offers Witty, Acerbic Take On Everything He Sees https://theonion.com/awful-man-offers-witty-acerbic-take-on-everything-he-s-1819570846/

Milli Vanilli's still alive! Huh!

Daffy Duck is a selfish AND terrible lover

Buying a ticket to ask him why he's such a bitch

*Michael Stipe voice* "NIGHT-SCREAMING"

"Sorry for posting, but" is never followed by a rational thought.

Not sure if that felt like too much