*to the tune of the activia commercials* suspiria

making small talk with charon

r's grandfather got her a skelteon

[to the tune of “Tiny Dancer”] Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

got a bunch of different ferns for this shady area in my backyard, plus a couple mountain mint varieties, a rattlesnake master, something with purple flowers i can't remember the name of, and a red osier dogwood that i plan to use as a mother plant for propagating for a future hedge. decent haul!!

cyber truck at the native plant sale

jokes about the confederacy are always funny, but you gotta think about it in terms of "Supernatural lasted 5x longer than the Confederacy", which is absolutely hysterical

lmao

reserved my spot for my first parent teacher conference

<seeing a post I disagree with> chilling... this is exactly what George Orwell wrote in his classic work titled "Posts I Disagree With"

now you know i love the zoo, the number 3 zoo in the country (and number 1 in my heart), but would it kill them to post a list of the plants that potentially could be available to purchase at their twice-yearly native plant sale

it really depends on whether i'm enjoying myself in the meantime. i'm fine with an author throwing me in the deep end and trusting me to get to shore on my own, but it has to be a fun swim and i have to trust that there's land *somewhere*

Watch the whole way through, you will not regret it.

that sign rules

"macrohard" jesus christ what a contemptible dork

in the cat in the hat comes back, the kids' father's shoes are worth $113.28 in today's money

finally, a thanksgiving dessert that reflects america in 2025

well this was a stupid day huh

he's just a little guy

getting cooked on this app (MyChart)

I'm not sure about this branding but I'm not the billionaire business genius

Sep 18th 2017 - A hungover Tree Gelbman wakes up on her birthday in a strange dorm room. On her way to a party that evening, she is murdered, and immediately wakes up, starting the day again in a time loop. 📽️📅 Happy Death Day (2017)

arise, my love, fresh horrors await us

traveling back in time to tell early 2000s me that the website i used to buy discount textbooks for grad school and the website i used to send money to my roommate are the trees of Great Evil

oh my god why does every school cafeteria smell exactly the same. just had a proustian moment and suddenly i was ten years old again

if i've learned anything from true crime, it's never trust someone described as a "prankster"

Salient advice

FUCK YES there's one (1) cvs in the greater cincinnati area providing the new pediatric covid vaccine and there was one (1) appointment left for today

some good news!

finally something to pair with my radioactive shrimp

Make sure you touch base with the Extremely Handsome Men in your life, it’s going to be a difficult day for them for sure

09/16/25 3^2/4^2/5^2 9+16=25 IT IS A DAY OF TRIVIAL MATHEMATICAL SATISFACTION, REJOICE

One of my favorite Robert Redford stories is when Mike Nichols was considering him for "The Graduate" and told him he needed to act like a guy who has struck out with women and Redford replied "what do you mean?"

this kid is sick AGAIN??

weakling children’s book authors: uhhh there are no animals that begin with x … X-ray fish??? eXtremely big bird? This is hard Richard Scarry: fuck you we’re learning Latin nomenclature

today's the tenth anniversary of the rottweiler tweet

dizzy! at the lab

man it's so fucked up how beautiful spotted lantern flies are

no thanks, you fucking dweeb

r wants to be tall enough to "eat the moon"

every time i see a butterfly now i just think "drinky sugar"

Dominico Pizzaman United States, Census, 1930

"hey guys"

r wants to hear all about the many ways eyes can get injured

🦄 Hawaiian fishes Honolulu, Hawaii, Tongg publishing company, 1944. [Source]

Do you think unbending Clippy until he was a long piece of metal would be painful for him. Or do you think it would cause him to feel a great sense of relief

“leftists have an infighting problem” buddy you should see what they’re doin to each other on the far right