extremely normal couple of days coming up

Tiny Tim, who did NOT hit her. He did not. Oh hi, ghost

ah yes, the festive crimcram crow caws for all this morn

you've been visited by the crimcram crime ram

everyone else is still asleep and it's almost 9!

*at a christmas party* oh Rudolph is your favorite reindeer? That’s cool yeah yeah he’s pretty great *in reindeer chat* BlitzenBoy92: at the work thinh. take a guess DonnerTime: buncha dolphies? VixenLover: fuckin lame bro just keep ur cool change the subject The Dasher Enjoyer: thinh

we cannot wrap presents bc r refuses to go to sleep

oh no! you've been cursed! you must now either skitter or slither. which do you choose?

(Electric Six voice) Manger! Manger! Hath spoken!

Bluesky is not a Christian website, but its morally scrupulous heart is very Catholic

this photo was going viral on here like an hour before Charlie Kirk got shot and now that the dust has settled somewhat it’s time to revisit how funny this is

Maroon 5 voice: This! Horse! Is! Kicking my dad to death, Kids say goodbye, No grampa anymooore,

i just heard her say "see ya, toilet!" as she flushed. this kid's a poet

The weasels in Roger Rabbit float up to heaven when they die because even the evil toons are unafflicted with human original sin

r's singing a song where the only lyrics are "my little tummy isn't full" honestly it slaps

(to the tune of "feliz navidad") denis villeneuve

Not now, hundreds of Victorian shoes.

Bob Wehadababyitsaboy will return in Avengers: Doomsday

i had to drop what i was doing to make this

From the 1966 Sunset Magazine “Sunset Cook Book of Breads”

that's clark, this is his point

Dec 22nd - When his family go on a Christmas vacation, Kevin McCallister was accidentally left behind. He does what any young boy does when he gets left #HomeAlone 📽️📅 Home Alone (1990)

Grink, Grank, Grunk

there’s a 30 rock bit for everything, if you just believe

Doc Bullfrog, you smoke too tough. Your swag too different. Your bitch is too bad. They’ll kill you.

Prosper Alphonse Isaac (France,1858-1924) #Fish, #stingray, and #octopus, c.1900–24 Black ink & watercolor wash on laid paper 7 15/16 × 6 3/16 in. (20.2 × 15.7 cm) MIA 2018.117.10 collections.artsmia.org/art/128659/f...

🎵you better wise up, bari weiss🎵

*the little nude white guys from common side effects skitter across the room*

me seeing an article about the 25 Hottest and Most Popular Celebrities: haha who are any of these people? me seeing a screenshot of a horrible post by CeleriusAvignon8888, Based Viscount of the New Bayesian Duchy of Pure Reason: oh it's this fuckin guy again

hey! hey!

there's a dad playing "babe i'm gonna leave you" by led zeppelin on acoustic guitar

going to a 4 year-old's birthday party with a dozen little girls guests, please keep your ol' pal mollz in your thoughts and prayers in this trying time

cool, cool cool

wait nat king cole was only 45 when he died???

we solstin

ohhhhhhh hell yeah its the fuckin solstice !!!!! fuck the equinox its #solstice the god damn #Solstice ‼️‼️

Ace attorney fans one joke is defrosting

7 year old giggling: when goku, gets super hungry, he eats like 30 meals in a row Me sounding exactly like Jesse Gemstone: I know how much goku eats

treen fish hams

One of the gifts I am giving this year was described as “Squishy Grinch.” Every time I see it I think, “Who up squishing they Grinch?”

lmao every year i forget that j has extended relatives with this last name and every year i get a little scare

It's your birthday, Duane.

It was such a joy to celebrate Hanukkah with Mandy, Kathryn and their son, Gideon. As Jewish New Yorkers across our city prepare to light candles and mark the seventh night today, I wish you and your families a Hanukkah full of light and love. youtu.be/KIxAKyioXng

You bolt awake in the seminary at Wittenberg. You are not online. It is 1517 AD. You are the monk Martin Luther, and you have changed your mind. The future cannot come to pass. Rome must prevail.

if i was in a pluribus situation, i think i would break in and explore a ton of people's homes. i'm just really nosy ok