SUBWAYTAKES GUY: So what’s your take POORLY DISGUISED BLACK BEAR: Campers should leave more food out

declaring her officially settled in

r's started watching friendship is magic and it is with a heavy heart i must admit that the bronies were right, this is a good show

this is the most millennial dad joke ever conceived

debbie chose tonight to explore the 2nd floor and particularly r's room, which explains why everyone is still awake at 10:45pm on a school night

Last night my wife said she grew up thinking the song "Mellow Yellow" was about the soft drink. I told her I'd always heard that it was about getting high by smoking banana peels. We checked Wikipedia, and...

East Liberty. 6231 Penn Ave - Target. Caller a bunch of kids just took his bike. Caller says he is wearing a Batman t-shirt and is chasing them down one at a time.

i looked up the plot for this book and every couple of words is a new punch to the head, i need to read this. Books are so cool.

i have learned that british people pronounce "thanks" with the same a sound as "apple". i'm very upset

HEAD OF TEETH

r's in the bathroom and she just yelled "you do NOT wanna smell this"

[chuckling indulgently as a data center vaporizes all the clean water in my town] well, you see, I've always been a free thinker and never been big on joining purity cults, so who's to say if this is good or bad

now more than ever

what if a baby was a gremlin

oh my GOODNESS there's a dog in my neighborhood named gladys, she's some kind of hound mix and she's incredible

that's haines, this is his town

on one hand, it's good to know that i have proper lifting form, on the other, my legs hurt so much rn gang, please pray for my leggies

My white allies: the way to show that you care about people of color as much as you care about your own is to pay as much attention when a majority Black city is under assault and send just as much aid. Minneapolis=60% white Memphis=63% Black

grogu is his nickname his full name is Gruesome Goo

day two of my big garden project, yesterday was laying bricks/pavers, prepping the site, today was planting, placing cardboard, and mulch. i'm halfway through mulching and i'm ready 2 die. hottest days of the year so far, in the sunniest spot in my backyard. i am a huge dumbass

Average bluesky experience: "Damn, it's raining ☹️" Someone 4 timezones away: "no it isn't? 🤨"

It was me, I broke Bluesky, I asked them for a nude Tayne

*to the tune of seal's "kiss from a rose"* poop from a butt

incredible things are happening

KOKO THE GORILLA: Koko birkin bag. Practical Koko possession bag RESEARCHER: No, Koko. You can’t have a Birkin bag. KOKO: Good Birkin good Koko give beautiful Koko deserve gorilla RESEARCHER: Koko, we simply can’t afford a Birkin bag. It is an unjustifiable expense. KOKO: jealousy professor

Me immediately thinking of a context that would invalidate the generalization you just posted

"hi, my name is doug, i'm a capricorn. i like hiking and running and standing really still. looking for my partner in crime"

ace ventura pet detective. i remember thinking "this is just stupid, it's not even funny

Guy with visible stink lines: the birth rate,

y'all ever eat ice cream on a warm sunday afternoon

guy who is mad at Nolan’s Odyssey because it depicts the sea as blue instead of wine-dark

#EBC162

the thing to understand about debbie is that she's killed before and i believe she'll kill again

did you hear about the horrifying thing that youre powerless to do anything about

While I was out yesterday, J did the following activity with our class. Please enjoy "Kids finish the lyrics"

i will never rate my purchase

Every time I open Bluesky,

considering getting a bunch of small bells to hang on my front bushes so the sound will scare the deer who try to eat them. fully leaning into whatever hedge witch direction i'm aimed toward

I knew something was up with that guy

SHE NAPPED ON MY LAP

i've known dozens of cats in my life and there is no louder purrer than debbie. it's like a biker gang

my red osier dogwood is starting to bloom!! i planted this last fall so this is my first time seeing these

i love using the wildlife identification app bc i see a weird ass bug and it's just like "insect? i guess?? i don't know man i'm pretty sure that's not a spider"

it's a gorgeous may afternoon, so you know what that means: r's watching halloween specials on kanopy

"from the hands that created coraline" from the HANDS!! art!!

goof morning