Ha ha April Fool. You've actually been having a bizarre dream and it is in fact 1996 right now. We are all going to go watch the new Coen Brothers movie 'Fargo' later. I will call you on your phone that is attached to a wall and can't make you insane later.

(unconfident Mario) it's uh, me - Mario.

she's literally funneling the cash from all her various media ventures into a money gun and pointing it directly at whichever institution promises to hurt trans people the most. she's not even lying about it. she's just telling you that's what she's going to do if you give her more money

First they came for the trans people, and I said nothing because I wasn’t trans. Then they were like actually I’m pretty sure you are trans and I said no I’m not and they went okay well show us your penis then and I said what no get out of my face and they said that one’s a girl get her

we appear to have four competing fascist movements jockeying for control: blood & soil nazism under miller and hegseth, darwinian ecofascism from rfk, technofascism under vance and musk, and one Big Wet Hitler who understands the true animating core of the american volk is a deep love for shopping

things every single republican president of your lifetime has done - started a war in the middle east - completely destroyed the economy

I feel this so hard

if you hate or love "maxxing" please be advised that guys my age think it's funny as hell and will shortly be using it approx. 500 times a day. you will be cringemaxxing and despairmaxxing but no amount of cringe & no depth of despair will stop the guys my age from usemaxxing "maxxing." just fyi

- most American Christians are not evangelicals - Beshear has held the line on LGBTQ rights better than a lot of far less religious Dems - James Talarico is right not to run as a Reddit atheist in Texas

there are a lot of sad things in the world right now but I can’t stop thinking about this little golden man who will be leaving us on Monday I love him so much

aspirational america is unmeasurably important not just here, but for the world

From @acyn.bsky.social (posted on X) "Reporter: Do any of you have a favorite animal? Child: My favorite one is a gold snake that can move. It has gold eyes, and it has a super-duper tail… Reporter: Mr. Mamdani, the second question for you. Mamdani: Yes. It’s also the golden snake."

I'm just a shitlib but i think there's a lot of evidence at this point that this level of concentrated wealth is incompatible with democracy

tomorrow is my birthday and all I want is for The Thing to happen please please

I’m old and have a lot less at stake than many people. If I get arrested, I won’t lose my pension. If I get shot, I’ll lose 10-20 years of arthritis getting worse and worse. I have no reason not to rouse a little rabble.

oh shit we got hennepin hannah

I used to be an extra and Catherine O'Hara is on my "people who were exactly as delightful as you'd hope" list.

❤️

brass solidarity band performing “stand by me” in the streets of whittier next to alex pretti’s memorial. the crowd started chanting “the people united will never be defeated” so they incorporated it into the song. i love minneapolis

this is so fucking beautiful, I'm crying again

Wake up. Make breakfast. Do email. Watch a murder. Go to a party for a 5 year old. Laugh with my daughter. See a different angle of that murder. Hear govt officials slander the victim. Play Barbies with my kid. Feed her dinner. Tear up at that victim reading last honors to a vet. Put kid to bed. USA

i’m not particularly attached to “abolish ICE” as a slogan but as a policy it’s mandatory

Republicans: everyone must be able to carry any gun at all times, up to and including high powered rifles, to protect themselves against tyranny also Republicans, without batting an eye: carrying a gun is unquestionable justification for federal agents to shoot you dead in the street

I’m not watching that video because watching the Renee Good video over and over fucked me up good. Sometimes it’s not cowardly to look away. Stay healthy so you can fight

To repeat: Abolish ICE.

I have only read text descriptions of what happened. If it's not your job, you really don't watch that video. There's no lay person on this app right now in the right headspace to be watching that video

The anger people have at media institutions and college administrators can’t be detached from this, it’s not just that people can perceive cowardice it’s that they see others with more on the line doing more to stand up for their values than the people who have been trusted to safeguard things

Seeing a bunch of normal ass midwestern moms and dads marching in -20 degrees knowing they might be tear gassed or worse really drives home what a cowardly lot of people the pundit class is

i am so sick of the dumbest people alive being in charge of everything and the second dumbest people alive writing opinion columns about how it's good

honestly "the chatbots are essentially the fae" would probably be better for normies as a mental model

Suspiciously asking my wife who's funding her anytime she criticizes me

I keep thinking about the toxic, pervasive mythology of "rugged individualism" as a driving force in American culture, and how the collective efforts in the Twin Cities right now are proof that the only way through hard times is together, as a community.

If you are in Seattle, please go patronize this store because this is amazing content/promo 😂 (laughing to keep from crying, and I do kind of low-key want that orange spider plant I have never seen that before) Source: www.instagram.com/reel/DTQrTqZ...

This cartoon was made with me in mind

GoFundMe for Kaden Rummler, the young trans man blinded by ICE agents this week. www.gofundme.com/f/stand-with...

“Don’t trust the experts”

The Trump admin, which says it was investigating fraud in Democratic-led states, quietly shelved a massive welfare fraud investigation in Mississippi involving public funds funneled to Brett Favre and others

Please support the good and brave people of beautiful Minnesota

Trump is selling seized Venezuelan oil and putting the cash in a bank account in Qatar. Nothing to see here. www.semafor.com/article/01/1...

boy that gyre sure keeps getting wider

this is all it’s really about for them. Not domestic policy, not “economic anxiety”, just an endless desire to punish stand-ins for the Mommy who forced them take a bath, even if it tanks their own quality of life.

so pretty soon ice will have deployed every officer they have to minneapolis and the thing to do then is cut a huge hole in the ice in a big lake and have bugs bunny dress up like a lady and stand behind talking all "help help rescue me from all the foreigners!"

stepped outside for a vibe check and saw a beast fuckin hauling ass towards Bethlehem

white guys who want to sneer at the resolve of liberal and left wing white women right now: this is a superb time to shut the fuck up and go do something useful instead

Who wants to be in my organized wine mom gang? I’ll bring the cheese and gluten free crackers

Went to an ICE Out for Good rally in Cal Anderson park today and y’all, the normies are MAD

WSJ investigation: In the past 6 months ICE agents have fired at vehicles 13 times, leading to: * 8 people shot * 5 of which were U.S. citizens * 2 died * no victims drew a weapon The playbook: Agents box in a vehicle, block attempts to flee, then fire www.wsj.com/us-news/vide...

There honestly cannot be a satire cutting enough to make fun of Americans. What the fuck do you mean the highest colonial ideal you could imagine was a parking lot with McDonald's on both sides