It's reasonable to assume that a calorie is a calorie until you read and discover the process is mindblowing. My approach is: the alternatives aren't at all equivalent, BUT any amount of your milk your baby gets is a gift only you could give them, and it doesn't have to be zero sum all or nothing.

Periodic request that if you have ANY leads on a job in Seattle/nearby, my eldest is looking for work. FT, PT, temp, anything. Bachelors in Public Health, experience in hospitals, direct patient care, emergency med, plus customer service & reception exp in court, social work & clinic settings.

Dee's birthday? I think I stopped drinking once we left the party, and by the time it ended, I was sober. I don't need the drinks. All I need is a DJ who knows how to fucking transition the songs properly.

…I gotta watch a random episode of the third season of an unrelated television show to understand this movie?? 😭😭 I’m GOOD!

I just put on my pajamas but I refuse to go down without a fight.

I’m sorry, am I to believe this young woman has romantic or sexual feelings for an erudite zombie?

no ass >> no ears

folks, Sean Duffy is very bad but even he knows that we need air traffic control, that’s why they’re canceling flights that is not a real quote, the account even says parody on it

The makeup line is insane but we should talk about how the cartilage in his ear magically grew back

4/4 I'm not feeling well. Exhausted. and I spent the whole damn day helping people who voted in 2024 to deprive me of my humanity. I have no fucks to give. But this brings me to the point of no matter what there is an element in this country that believes Black ppl were created to serve them.

Tim Walz also signed into law free lunch for kids. We coulda had him, y’all. And we wouldn’t be here.

If we don’t, how will we eliminate all the jobs? I mean think about it you fools

Tech guys six months ago: haha yes we’re cutting all this WASTEFUL spending by eliminating medical research and USAID Tech guys now: yes I think taxpayers will be excited to bailout my non consensual pornography machine

We got to tour a distillery and blend our own whiskey using different whiskies! A belated gift for Jocelyn. A perfect friend day! (Baltimore spirits company)

for the longest time ive been pronouncing them as "co-ela-canth" but its "see-la-canth"

Folks can set themselves up to win by saving preferences and customizations in a note. That way, not only do I not have to make yet another decision, I don't have to run down my order and specs yet again. I can go cry in the shower and put on comfy pants before the food gets here.

Look. Back in college, I took wifey out to an Italian restaurant and she fell in love with their chicken marsala. Guess what I learned how to make? She had a rough day at work? Guess what I’m making for dinner? Gotta learn how to win.

If you get on that woman and start studying them real good… you ain’t gotta ask a lot of questions You gone know them better than cover 3

Yall married and have a child and you don’t know what she wants from the spot and that she will be hungry at some point in the day?

Like all yall have to do is pick OR if you must have me make a choice, narrow it down to two options we both eat and THEN just ask A or B.

I scored zero. I’ve done them all. Am I the Highlander?

At the heart of every woman she’s essentially a food… figure out the kind… figure out the order and you can live as a god forever

And they stay with their hands in our pockets when they fail but that wealth stays in theirs

I don’t even have to say it. Y’all could say it for me. ___ ____ ______.

When one of my cousins got engaged I gave him all the tips. He ain’t listen. The engagement lasted half a football season.

Just pinned it to my profile. I will keep adding to it as I remember where I got cool stuff.

Trying to sell me a product that’s giving people asthma, inducing suicidal ideation, and using up all the water, but can’t do math and does not know how many r’s are in “blueberry” for the low low price of MY tax money? Do I have that right? What happened to the money your investors gave you?

what is this, amateur hour?! loaves & fishes, my man. loaves & fishes.

What a disappointing human

A loud reminder that Zohran Mamdani's middle name is KWAME and he was named after Ghana's first president after Independence: KWAME NKRUMAH.

Only way we'd get "left behind" is because they're sabotaging & not innovating on traditional tools anymore in order to force us to use weak monthly subscription Ai tools. It's like making wood handles on all new hammers rubber & then telling ppl "See! battery powered nail guns are superior!".

NEVER fall for it when she says she doesn't want a plate. Not gonna lie it has that je ne sais quoi when you take a bite of what somebody else has though.

Bruh…when she says she’s good, SHE AIN’T GOOD! Don’t even ask. BUY AN EXTRA PLATE!

In today's episode of listen to Black women:

My people. 🫂

You should have known to buy 2.

My boss once forced me to use AI to edit a paper. She sat next to me and told me how to do it and watched me. It found one valid error, a typo. Meanwhile, my own eyeballs found 63 errors. Tell me how AI is better again?

Get ya ears off the charger and listen: “I don’t know what I want” doesn’t mean I’m not hungry. It means I’m about two inhales from being violently hangry & lack the executive function to navigate a menu. Know what I like to eat and FEED ME so no one gets hurt.

Now why you ain’t buy two? Rookie behavior. SMH

With the added caveat: while people are starving, being kidnapped, and fired while the governments on paid vacation

Ours was the sweet tea pitcher. We would make sweat tea in the yard (you know, with the sun), and then put it into this pitcher.

What stage of capitalism is ‘make a bubble so big you can publicly highlight the need for a bailout before it happened’

have you ever taken a picture of someone you love doing the most mundane thing and you don't even know why, exactly, but somehow it feels like there is a glimpse of the divine in their very existence and you managed to catch it

Evidently AI needs us to bail it out and these losers are gonna try to tell us it's a win🙄

“AI is inevitable” “You better learn to use AI or get left behind” First of all, guttersnipes, do y’all have AI money?

Obviously I'm not the only one who misinterpreted Justice Ketanji Brown Jackson's Friday night stay, but when you look at the details of why she entered the stay you can see how deliberately confusing Trump's USDA has been since September on issuing or not issuing SNAP benefits.

keeping recipes >>>>>>

I STILL HAVE MINE. When I went to college my mom gave me the old one, so yes I drank beer out of the pitcher I drank OJ out of as a child. I just moved, the same pitcher is sitting on the counter of my new apt 😂😂😂

The bookstore Kelly manages has been going regionally viral on tiktok, so if you’re an author friend of mine (especially a Black woman) and you’re wondering why you’re suddenly selling so many books in central Indiana, I can make a guess!